Pamela, A Love Story (2023)

First of all, I'm glad that this documentary "went there." It doesn't really shy away from any of the ugly parts of her life and embraces all the embarrassing details. I was also surprised how much nudity they included, since you figure at some point her sons would watch it (I was very relieved that they seem to have turned out well, despite all the shit they went through). That being said, with how raw and open she is about everything that happened to her, it's still shocking to me how a sex tape effectively ruined Pamela's life and career, yet became a stepping stone for the likes of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian. I feel like that's the most fucked up thing; that she never really got her due or was able to build and control her own image (similar to Marilyn Monroe, I suppose). I was actually very moved and proud of her for headlining Broadway as part of her "redemption arc." It's inspiring how she pulled herself together and still seems keen on working in the arts. She definitely needs more opportunities to keep her busy and stop her from regressing into more empty marriages.

3 centerfolds out of 5

Still: A Michael J. Fox Movie (2023)

Michael J. Fox was dealt a bad hand. Diagnosed with Parkinson's disease in 1991, he kept his condition to himself for almost a decade, when he became a public advocate and eventually created his own foundation for Parkinson's research in 2000. And the poor guy has been hanging in there ever since.

I put this off for awhile, but it's a really great doc. It doesn't shy away from the harsh realities of his condition, but treats it with empathy, kindness, humanity and dignity. It's also really fucking funny. I guess you have to have a strong sense of humor in order to survive that kind of tragic day-to-day struggle.

The way they combined old film/TV footage and outtakes in order to tell the story of his life was brilliantly put together. I've been a fan since Family Ties and the Back to the Future films, so there was a lot of history there. I feel so bad for the man, because you can still see the same light shining from behind his eyes; he simply can't control his movements. And all those falls and breaks and pins inside him...it's just heartbreaking to fathom. Selfishly, all I can think about is how much my life would be improved if I had a partner like Tracy in it. Despite all the bullshit he's had to endure and everything he's suffered for the past 30+ years, he's still pretty lucky to have someone like that by his side.

3½ takes out of 5

Val (2021)

Throughout the course of his life, Val Kilmer shot hundreds of hours of home movies and personal footage, spanning 40 years. After being diagnosed with throat cancer in 2015, these archives were uncovered and assembled into a documentary told through his own words and narrated by his son, Jack Kilmer.

A promising young man with a playful persona, Val was a misunderstood artist typecast in a number of roles who lived life to the fullest while struggling to find his voice. It's a raw and intimate and deeply reflective journey ultimately ending in tragedy, but there is great power in having a voice and being able to tell one's own story, even when ironically it has been cruelly taken away. 

3 top guns out of 5

Chris Hemsworth: A Road Trip to Remember (2025)

After being diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer's, Chris takes his dad Craig Hemsworth on a trip down memory lane through the Northern Territory of Australia as a bonding exercise and an effort to recapture the past, since it's been proven that reminiscence therapy can slow down cognitive decline. The subject matter in itself makes this inherently sad, even as it celebrates a life, while Chris confronts his own genetic predisposition towards the disease. Although it can all feel so fruitless at times, there is also the cynicism that this type of experience can only come about through a publicly funded project. 

3 Crocodile Hunters out of 5

Stiller & Meara: Nothing is Lost (2025)

Ben Stiller directs this film as a touching tribute to his showbiz parents who performed together as a double act for decades. While going through their personal belongings in preparation of selling their home, it becomes about Ben and his sister's story as much as it is about their parents, told through home movies, audio recordings and letters left behind. It's a deeply affecting and often uncomfortable look at growing up amidst fame and professional embitterments, told through the uniquely skewed perspective of being an actor. It's very much a family affair that soon becomes a healing project and a way of connecting with his own kids, who grew up with similar experiences.

3 contained emotions out of 5

John Candy: I Like Me (2025)

A portrait on the late actor who starred in 43 films in his 43 short years. Still remembered fondly by fans and all who knew him, he was larger than life, but known for his kind heart and gentle nature. If you're looking for dirt, you won't find it here. No one has nary a bad word to say about him. His only demons were the ones he was battling in silence. A lot of his story is told in his own words, as well as through his SCTV castmates, and especially his collaboration with John Hughes. He resists being typecast as the fat man, while seeming very secure in who he is, which remains relevant 30 years after his death. Like John Belushi or Chris Farley, he appears to live on with each new generation.

3 smiles through the pain out of 5

Note: Hearing Catherine O'Hara give John's eulogy hits doubly hard now. R.I.P.

Marty, Life is Short (2026)

Comic actor Martin Short has led a life lined with many failures, punctuated by death and tragedy, but in the process managed to find his own voice. Filled with madcap energy, and ever the life of the party, his efforts might come off as exhausting, but his sensibilities are always funny. His greatest success was with his wife Nancy, whom he shared 36 years with before her life was cruelly curtailed. Lawrence Kasdan's documentary explores the behind the scenes through home movies and celebrity interviews, who all praise the man behind the persona, previously a one-note joke, but now more in demand than ever.

3 insults out of 5

Steve! (Martin): A Documentary in 2 Pieces (2024)

"Do you ever get sad because you're not as happy as you think you should be?"

Steve Martin has always been an enigmatic figure to me, even though I've been watching his movies ever since he turned grey. Fascinating to see how his rocky childhood, Disney upbringing (working at a magic shop) and 15 years of stand-up helped hone him into the wild and crazy guy he would become. And yeah, even the banjos stretch back that far. This doc contains a lot of rare footage and newly filmed interviews, and even a couple of candid moments of raw emotion. The first half covers his upbringing up until his "retirement" from stand-up in 1980, while the rest encapsulates the breadth of his film career all the way to his successful stage show with Martin Short. It's a good overview a life well-lived; recommended for fans and comedy nerds alike.

3½ arrows through the head out of 5

I'm Chevy Chase and You're Not (2025)

An impartial look at the comedic actor known for playing bumbling, arrogant characters with his trademark acerbic wit, from his beginnings with National Lampoon to his meteoric rise on Saturday Night Live; and the flourishing film career at the height of his popularity, before his perceived fall from grace. 

I've always liked Chevy Chase. Even when the world says you shouldn't like 'this person' because of 'this, that or the other.' Honestly, I relate more to the outcasts than anything. Once you get past his thorny exterior, you realize he's full of contradictory layers; thin-skinned and sensitive to criticism, but just wants to be loved. Even when he rubs people the wrong way, there's a self-awareness of coping and pain behind his eyes. This doc features him, warts and all. My only complaint is that it feels like it merely scratches the surface.

3 pratfalls out of 5

Lorne (2026)

Lorne Michaels, the maverick behind Saturday Night Live for the past five decades, is given his own spotlight here, where he is as cagey, elusive and stoic as ever, including to his own friends and co-workers. This doc attempts to penetrate the mystique that surrounds this aura with a cheeky narrative approach that guesses at half-truths, along with some candid footage of the man behind the curtain at Studio 8H, where he ushered in an era of counter-cultural voices and leaves behind an enormous legacy of comedic talent. Yet, at the end of the day, we still don't know much more than when we started. 

2½ Dr. Evil impressions out of 5

The AI Doc: Or How I Became an Apocaloptimist (2026)

What is A.I.? That's the first question the film poses and I was already lost from there because nobody seems to agree on anything. Interviews with leading experts in the field are juxtaposed with the story of a guy whose wife has recently become pregnant and is worried about the world their children will inherit. Predictably, it's filled with lots of doom and gloom and fearmongering, but it's a complex, multifaceted issue. Told in three parts—the pessimists, the optimists, and the realists—there is also a fourth part to the story: the people getting rich off this technology, which is really all it boils down to. Like the Space Race 2.0, it's a rush to whoever can get to the finish line first. The scary part is that this technology exists in the hands of everyone, so it can be exploited for their own gain depending on their moral values, which is where the true evil lies. At a certain point, I find myself on the side of the robots.

Part of the problem with this doc is that technology moves so quickly that a lot of this information already feels obsolete. Before long, it becomes clear that none of these so-called "experts" know what the fuck they're talking about. It's all endless speculation. There are good and bad outcomes, but nobody knows for sure what will happen. No one can predict the future, not even A.I. 

In short, this movie stressed me the fuck out. I did not feel assured by the end.

2½ Arthur C. Clarke predictions out of 5

Mel Brooks: The 99 Year Old Man! (2026)

An informal sitdown with the director/writer/actor/producer extraordinaire, recounting his storied career through new interviews and a wealth of archival materials culled from his 75+ year career. Literally 99 at the time of release, Brooks remains a natural showman and a gifted storyteller, demonstrating a brilliant mind of quick wit and even quicker retorts, while exploring the many contradictory sides to the man; comedy icon, serious introspective, political provocateur. Yet he proves himself to be a real mensch. This extensive deep dive interweaves his body of work with his private life; his longtime marriage to Anne Bancroft and his lifelong friendship with Carl Reiner. And death. A lifetime of death and tragedy follow you when you're the 2000 Year Old Man.

All of this rare footage is so entertaining and engrossing that it's hard not to develop a ton of respect for someone who claims to be so tasteless and ribald, yet has contributed such a lasting legacy to film. I'm glad I saw it while he's still alive because I expect it would hit a lot differently after the fact.

4 more hits than flops out of 5

Note: Features the final on-screen interviews of David Lynch and Rob Reiner.

Music by John Williams (2024)

A cursory glance into the life and storied career of composer and conductor John Williams, although it leaves out much of his vast, 70+ year repertoire.

Jaws, Star Wars, Superman, E.T., Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park, Harry Potter, etc. You know the music. He's a part of all our collective psyche. John Williams was long overdue to have his own documentary, and here he tells his story in his own words, along with interviews from filmmakers and fellow composers, many of whom I had never seen their face before. It seems like no one has a bad word to say about the man; everybody praises him and it's hard to argue with the results. Mr. Williams himself comes off as humble, intelligent and charming. If it was even possible for me to have more respect for him, I did. 

Spielberg knew the genius of Williams early on and hitched his wagon to him from the start of his journey, and they brought out the best in each other. Not just collaborators, but great friends. It's exciting to see their collaboration in motion in behind the scenes footage, and also learning that it was Spielberg who convinced Williams and Lucas to work together and score Star Wars.

On a personal note, JW is responsible for so much of my love of filmmusic and classical music alike. An inspirational figure through all of his 100+ scores. He represents the music of childhood and the rich symphonic tapestry to my life.

4 leitmotifs out of 5

Ennio: The Maestro (2021)

AKA: The Glance of Music

A comprehensive look into the life, legacy and extensive career of Italian film composer Ennio Morricone. Known for so much more than the "wah wah" sound of Sergio Leone's spaghetti westerns, his rich orchestral soundscape spanned the course of 500 compositions in 75 years, which is an incredible metric by any standard. Featuring in-depth interviews from contemporaries, the biggest treasure trove here is a newly filmed conversation with the maestro himself, completed shortly before his death in 2020. It's an exhaustive deep dive that revisits his career, decade by decade, landing on all the greatest hits. As the ultimate retrospective, it's impossible to cover the entire breadth of his work, but this is a good start. None is more deserving of such a celebrated tribute.

4 cinematic vistas out of 5

Piece by Piece (2024)

Hip-hop mogul and producer Pharrell Williams inexplicably tells his life story through a documentary presented entirely in animated Lego form. Why? is the question I kept asking myself throughout. Pharrell experiences the world through synesthesia, which is a way of processing everything through color in the mind's eye. It's your typical, cookie-cutter rags to riches story, with the usual rise and fall (ever so brief) before inevitably coming back stronger than ever. Nevertheless, it contains a wide range of songs from his musical career and it succeeds by marrying the colorful images and catchy songs together. However, at the heart of it all, it still feels like a cynical ego-driven vanity project. I probably would have enjoyed this more as a series of music videos.

2½ Lego McNuggets out of 5

Billie Eilish - Hit Me Hard and Soft: The Tour (Live in 3D) (2026)

Over the past two decades, James Cameron has directed three movies about tall blue alien dudes...and this, a concert film/documentary featuring 24-year-old, 10-time Grammy winner Billie Eilish during the final leg of her 2025 tour. It's a dynamic performance full of spectacle and boundless energy, as the pop singer-songwriter bounds up and down the 360° stage with a swollen ankle. No matter what you think of her music, you have to respect the gumption and raw talent it takes to command a stage like that, while we observe glimpses of her working hard behind the scenes. It's the very definition of a vanity piece, but it's made with the fans in mind, so you know you're going to get a lot of footage of teen girls crying in the rafters. It's the closest approximation to a live concert experience I've probably ever had sitting in a movie theater.

Regardless of whether you're a fan or not, this is what true power looks like.

3½ bad guys out of 5 (duh)

EPiC: Elvis Presley in Concert (2025)

While Peter Jackson is busy preserving The Beatles' legacy, Baz Luhrmann is doing his part for Mr. Presley. As part of his research for the 2022 biopic, Elvis, he came across newly uncovered archival materials and stitched them with audio recordings from the King himself to create this ultimate documentary and concert film, told through his own voice, some 50 years after his death.

What's great about this movie is how much it humanizes the man, because there is a tendency nowadays to tear down and reframe the past from a modern perspective, and it's become increasingly easy for people to cast aspersions towards people who are no longer around to defend themselves.

Interweaving interviews with behind-the-scenes footage, the film is at its best when it allows the raw performances to play out in full, and becomes frustrating when it chooses to chop up performances with vocal overlays. 

Digitally restored with enhanced audio, it looks and sounds great, which makes it a must-see for any fans. It features Elvis in his prime; always the premier showman, with a playful stage persona, he lives up to his reputation.

4 hip gyrations out of 5

Michael (2026)

The long-awaited, "official" Michael Jackson biopic finally arrives, and I was its biggest skeptic. Honestly, while I was entertained throughout, it does feel less than impressive. It sands down most of the edges, but still manages to hit all the biggest story beats and peculiarities, like his obsession with Peter Pan and exotic animals (complete with CGI Bubbles), various surgeries and the infamous Pepsi incident. It only tells about half of the story (from 1966 to 1988) and basically turns into a concert film at the end, but mostly focuses on Michael's strained relationship with his abusive father and how he finally manages to break free and come into his own. His story is larger than life to match his massive talent, but the music speaks volumes and remains as iconic as ever. Jaafar Jackson (real-life nephew to Michael) embodies his spirit, even as I was put off by the uncanny valley cast by all the makeup and prosthetics involved therein. Michael had a real gift that can't be denied, even to those who are dedicated to smearing one's legacy. While it can be argued that it's heavily sanitized and has no teeth, it ends on a high note rather than a low.

The movie: 3 nose jobs out of 5

The music: 5 moonwalks out of 5

Note: It's amusing to me that Mike Myers basically plays the same type of executive character here as he did in the Queen Bohemian Rhapsody biopic.

Young Washington (2026)

Sadly, this isn't a case of a Mel Brooks-style spoof starring Gene Wilder and Marty Feldman. Which would have actually made this pile of shit watchable.

Just in time for the semiquincentennial of the United States of America, this patriotic hogwash is a dry, stale series of historical reenactments steeped in 18th century propaganda. I know it's become the vogue thing to shit on history, especially when it comes to celebrating victory steeped in violence, but this is a very sanitized PG-13 version of events, full of divine intervention, which doesn't seem especially historically accurate. It follows young Georgie as he makes his way up the ranks of warfare, stopping just short of the American Revolutionary War, with the Declaration of Independence and his Presidency merely relegated to a footnote. I don't have any issues with celebrating key historical figures, but I do have a problem with lame nationalistic messages being passed off as light entertainment. This movie feels like school.

1 quarter out of 5

Supergirl (2026)

Supergirl deserves her due. Kara isn't just some carbon copy of Superman. She's a reluctant hero with a punk rock attitude. Unfortunately, it feels like she's been sidelined for most of her own movie. As the second film in the DCU, this doesn't feel part of a cohesive whole. The stakes are curiously low. Lobo is in it for some reason, but doesn't really justify his inclusion. Milly Alcock is super as the titular heroine, but by the time she's kicking ass in the suit, it's already fallen victim to a generic capeshit plot. It does exactly what you think it's going to do. No subverted expectations here. It lacks all of the darkness and emotional depth that made Superman stand out for me, which doesn't bode well for the DCU's future. It's too bad because I was rooting for her all along.

2 bastiches out of 5

Note: Next project in the DCU will be the limited series Lanterns this summer, followed by the theatrical release of Clayface, just in time for Halloween '26.

Toy Story 5 (2026)

The reason this franchise hits so hard is because it's clearly made by people who love film and have a fond remembrance of childhood. Each one has been about embracing and leaving behind the past, and as we get older, so do our memories. The farther away we are from those experiences, the harder it hits.

This one tells the story of how electronic devices are leaving the traditional brick and mortar toys in the dust and forcing kids to grow up too quickly. It's easily the most depressing entry of the series and makes me feel older and more obsolete than ever because it hits on an inevitable truth. It seems like it's on the verge of having something significant to say, but then bails out at the last minute. It's a shame. Can't disparage our technological overlords, I guess...

2½ Lilypads out of 5

Toy Story 4 (2019)

Boy, 2019 feels like a long way behind. This film features the vocal talents of Don Rickles, Carl Reiner, Betty White, Estelle Harris and Carl Weathers, all of whom are no longer with us anymore. It also predates COVID, which feels like simpler times. Film truly is a time capsule. It's important to preserve the past.

Likewise, this franchise understands the value of legacy while continuing to take risks and reinvent itself, branching out in all new directions. This film is about those left behind who must move on from the past in order to find new purpose. It does it in traditional Pixar fashion and succeeds with flying colors.

This would have worked better as the last film in the series, but, you know...

3½ sporks out of 5

The Death of Robin Hood (2026)

Did we really need a dark and gritty version of Robin Hood? This is basically Logan without the mutant healing factor. Once known for stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, now the legendary outlaw slaughters everyone for their goods, rich and poor, old and young. Although the bulk of this film takes place on an island as he recovers from an attack, which was exceeding dull and monotonous to slog through. The problem was I just didn't care. The biggest struggle was trying to stay awake. I couldn't wait until it was over.

1 bloodletting out of 5

Disclosure Day (2026)

I have to take a moment to appreciate that it's 2026 and we're getting a new original Spielberg sci-fi epic with possibly one of the last original scores by John Williams. These days feel numbered. Spielberg has been obsessed with extraterrestrials his entire career. It feels like he's completing a cycle here that began nearly 50 years ago with Close Encounters of the Third Kind. In many ways, he's been working towards this film his entire life. The scale is smaller and more intimate, but the implications are timeless. We've all grown so cynical in this day and age, yet I admire how he makes magic and wonder seem possible again in the world, even if it only exists on the silver screen.

3½ cardinals out of 5

Scary Movie (2026)

Reboots are all the rage these days. Just as Scream called out the idea of the requel (both a reboot and legacy sequel), this "rebootiquel" aims its sights at cancel culture and poking fun at Gen Z. The Wayans are back, restoring their own particular brand of R-rated humor to the franchise. It casts a wide net, but their target is far too broad. Despite the plethora of modern and niche horror references and meta, self-referential humor, it doesn't feel as though it will age as well as the first two. It's funny, but never quite as funny as it should be. It's filthy, but not quite as filthy as it could be. And yet, when the humor hits, it hits HARD. I never wanted it to end. It's comforting to see the old gang and that early naughts humor back again, even if it's just a shadow of its former glory.

2-and-a-half-gay shit out of 5

Stop! That! Train! (2026)

What if a bunch of drag queens made Airplane!? Answer: It would've sucked balls. A runaway train is headed directly towards the eye of a "Stormaganza" and the conductor is taken out of commission, so it's up to the Glamazonian stewardesses and the President of the United States (RuPaul) to get them back on track. I'm a sucker for anything that follows in the broad footsteps of ZAZ, even when it's diluted by modern day sensibilities and wokeness, but this is such lazy, ill-conceived, low-hanging fruit. To turn a spoof of disaster flicks into something this disastrous takes a special kind of talent all its own. The result is something that feels far too safe and "inclusive" rather than poking fun at everyone equally. This feels like the absolute antithesis to Scary Movie.

½ a hot flashback out of 5

I Am Not an Easy Man (2018)

AKA: Je ne suis pas un homme facile

Okay, so I saw it. 

A chauvinist man bumps his head and winds up in a parallel universe where gender roles have been reversed and women are the dominant sex. Unlike the American remake where everything is an exaggerated stereotype, here the differences are more subtle, and it has fun with the premise rather than being overtly preachy. Some of these distinctions feel cultural, such as women being topless and sporting body hair, which seems rather European in nature. 

The reason this movie doesn't work is because if you were to reverse the gender roles back, it becomes a rather trite story that doesn't hold up to scrutiny. A lot of these outdated clichés went out in the '90s. However, it's not as one-sided as the remake makes it out to be, and it at least falls back on a clever ending. What I learned here is what a big difference 8 years can make.

2 pectoral landing strips out of 5

Ladies First (2026)

A misogynist hits his head and wakes up in a misandrist's world dominated by women, effectively inverting their positions. Once you get the joke that every single gender role is reversed, the plot doesn't get any deeper than that. What doesn't make any sense is that the men are all feminized and the women are endowed with masculine qualities, which contradicts the very message it's trying to put across, so I'm not sure what this film is trying to say. The endless moralizing on screen comes off condescending, exhausting and insufferable. And without any of the male empowerment roles that are afforded to women, the men here are all portrayed as either weak or evil, with no in-between. It might be considered problematic if the whole thing wasn't so fuckin' stupid. 

Remake of the French film, I Am Not an Easy Man, which I have no plans to see.

0 testicle bras out of 5

The Breadwinner (2026)

I'm not sure where the hell Nate Bargatze came from, but the world really likes telling us he's all of a sudden somehow the highest grossing stand-up comedian in America. Marketed as a clean comic to broaden his fanbase, he comes across as a likeable everyman, in a milquetoast kind of way. This is a very old fashioned kind of family comedy (à la Mr. Mom) where the father has to step up and take on the role of house husband after his wife is offered a huge business opportunity. It's completely generic, inoffensive and full of product placement to remind you he's being sponsored by all the big brands.

1½ bubbles of consent out of 5

Tuner (2025)

A virtuoso piano tuner with sensitive hearing and pitch perfect ability utilizes his specialized skill set to crack safes after he's accidentally recruited by the wrong type of people. It's a very simple premise, but extremely charming in the way it plays out, owing in no small part to the chemistry between the two young leads. It feels like the type of caper film that could have been made in the '70s, no doubt due to Dustin Hoffman's captivating presence in the cast.

3 tuna fish out of 5

In the Grey (2026)

Guy Ritchie movies bore me silly. It's a lot of bravado and bluster wrapped up in a glossy package of pretty actors posing like models. They mainly seem to exist as an excuse to employ Henry Cavill. This one is a formulaic heist thriller that amounts to roughly an hour and a half of setup for 15 minutes of payoff. 

½ a Faraday cage out of 5

The Furious (2025)

AKA: Huo zhe yan (火遮眼)

A mute father teams up with a journalist to take on a corrupt criminal empire after his daughter gets kidnapped. The laziest way to garner sympathy from an audience is to put a young, innocent life in danger, so I can't quite explain why this movie feels fresh. Like The Raid before it, it takes enormous swings with brutal martial arts, stylish choreography and nonstop pulse-pounding action from start to finish. It's the kind of movie where you walk out sporting an erection because of how much adrenaline is coursing through your body.

3½ bloody pulps out of 5

The Punisher: One Last Kill (2026)

Frank Castle wrestles with demons of his past and forced to go on a violent spree set to some heavy metal needle drops in this one-shot, standalone, hour-long Marvel Television Special Presentation. Mostly satisfying, after sitting through the lackluster second season of Daredevil: Born Again. Jon Bernthal is compelling to watch as the PTSD-addled veteran with nothing left to lose. Funny that he also co-wrote and starred in a thematically similar one-off episode of The Bear that unfolds in much the same gritty, guerilla-style fashion (which makes it especially bizarre that they were both released within a week of each other). It's a very simple story and I appreciated that it wasn't moralistic or preachy in any way, although it does make me feel about as empty as Frank Castle. It neither moves the needle nor overstays its welcome, but mostly functions as a bridge to The Punisher's appearance in the MCU.

3 headshots out of 5

Masters of the Universe (2026)

I should preface this nut by stating that I don't have a very strong connection to the He-Man and the Masters of the Universe franchise. As with G.I. Joe and Transformers, it was a cartoon designed to sell a toy line. I never really found the premise too deep. Aside from owning a single He-Man action figure as a kid, I have no nostalgic ties to the character or the canon, which makes me the perfect guinea pig to test out the new direction of this latest reimagining.

Young Prince Adam is, by all accounts, a pussy (not unlike Cringer). When the evil Skeletor threatens Eternia, his royal parents send him to Earth (not unlike Kal-El) along with the Sword of Power, which he promptly loses. 15 years later, he tracks it down and returns to claim his birthright. So far, so good, right?

This movie is frustrating because of how much it does right. Visually, it looks amazing. The scale is epic, rich and powerful. The action scenes are dynamic and exciting. The soundtrack is fucking rocking, courtesy of Brian May from Queen (lots of nods to Highlander). However, tonally, it's weird and all over the fucking place. Everything is treated as a joke. Adam never really changes; even when harnessing the power of Grayskull, he's still the same loser except with half the wardrobe. Teela is the one to show him the ropes and assumes the position of power over him and her father, the drunken and disgraced Man-At-Arms. Skeletor looks way better than his 1987 representation yet still feels hugely underdeveloped. Evil-Lyn is hot and that's about the extent of her role.

What I can't forgive is the neutered characterization of Adam (as a modern day he-man in touch with his emotions), even as it attempts to address and criticize toxic masculinity. But it's simply not fun. In every other way, it blows the 1987 film out of the water. Yet it could have been so much better. Its sole purpose for existing seems primarily intended to bait Doc and Neg back out of hiding.

2 fistings out of 5

The Mandalorian and Grogu (2026)

It's been 7 years since the last theatrical Star Wars release. Since then, there have been 7 different live-action Star Wars TV shows released on Disney+, including The Mandalorian. Set several years after Return of the Jedi, the series follows bounty hunter Din Djarin and his apprentice Grogu (colloquially known as "Baby Yoda") in their adventures across the galaxy. The first two seasons were great, and felt like a return to the raw and gritty side of Star Wars seen in the original 1977 release. Their further adventures were stitched between The Book of Boba Fett (technically season 2.5) and season 3, at which point it burned through its goodwill and felt like there was no real direction for the future. After taking a few years off, creator Jon Favreau brings us this self-contained standalone story, which could easily be dubbed season 4.

Grogu (50 years of age) still hasn't grown up and suffers from a distinct lack of character development, which mostly hinges on being cute. And cute he is. The puppetry and practical effects are to be commended because it feels like it could have been crafted in the '80s. Meanwhile, Mando is a man of few words and even fewer facetime. The duo are sent on a mission to retrieve Jabba the Hutt's son and feature in largely generic set pieces. Grogu is by far the more interesting character and he shines whenever he's on screen. The best part is easily a wordless sequence that takes place late in the film. In the end, we still know nothing about these characters and we are no better for it. Still, I enjoy this stuff more than the self-seriousness of Andor. This is the way.

3 plot armors out of 5

Backrooms (2026)

Kane Parsons was only 16 years old when he created his found footage web series The Backrooms, based on the popular creepypasta. Now at 20, he adapts his own material for his first feature film, which retains its grassroots design.

It's interesting how internet-based folklore (such as Slender Man) has steadily creeped its way into our collective subconscious, but it tends to keep building on itself. Taking its origins in the 1990s and early 2000s, the idea of glitching through reality into a space "in between" that stretches out infinitely is pure nightmare fuel. It has that uneasy feeling of being lost in the outer boundaries of a video game, and the ensuing claustrophobia and panic that sets in when you realize there's no escape. This is spooky stuff that hits at a primal level. This type of labyrinthine fever dream was also recently explored in Exit 8.

This movie is quite the experience. It's almost as if someone mainlined Twin Peaks season 3 directly into their veins. A lot of bizarre, nonsensical stuff that can't be explained and held together by dream logic, haunting imagery and loose strands of plot. It is truly eerie and unpredictable. I can't get enough of this shit. It leaves so much to the imagination. A simple, back to basics horror concept that can be explored ad nauseam, yet it merely scratches the surface. Just don't wander in too deep or you might get trapped in some rabbit holes.

4 l̶̛̛͖̮̞͉̽͋̈́̀͊͛̐̅͂͘̚͝i̸̡͖̗͉̽̇͒̏̈́̒̐ͅm̶̛̩̖̗͇̺͕̹͙̜̜̺̳̎͑̌̀͛͂̀̈́̇ͅi̶̛̙̳̙̘̭̭͇̻̲͎̒̀̊͑̎̿̿͒̋̑̄n̵̯̳̺̲̔̋͂̈̊̆̇̍͗̿ą̶̨̰̹͚̖̈́̑̐̉̀̂̄͑͗̕͠ͅͅl̵̡͙͇̯̤͇͔̮͍̪̦͒͌̔̈́͗̾ ̵͚̭̈́̌̏̓̿̽͊͌̾͑̓̚͝s̸͔̳̱̖̖̜̓͒̂͊̉͜͝͝͝ͅp̵̨̨̡̜̟̹͔͆͋̅̅̽̾͗̇̽̈́̋̚͘a̷̯̟̩̹̦̥̥̯̍̈́̄̒͛̈́̓͌̑͗̂̒͝c̷̨̧͕̝͓̬̠̫͎̟̖̼̪̐ͅę̶̨͔͉̯̰̬̲̹̰͍̫̦̆͒s̴̢̨͇͇̙͓̞͇͖̞͖̰͍͝ out of 5

Passenger (2026)

A haunted figure who roams the side of the highway stalks a young couple who have recently dedicated themselves to life on the road. It's pretty rote, straightforward horror which held my interest but is easily forgotten by day.

1½ St. Christopher pendants out of 5

Obsession (2025)

Bear loves Nikki more than anything in the world and makes a wish upon a cheap novelty trinket for her to love him more than anything in the world, despite not having any romantic feelings towards him. Similar to a monkey's paw or a Zoltar machine, it's a magical totem where your greatest dream can quickly spiral into a nightmare. It explores the sinister side of relationships, becoming a question of agency, where one party has no say in the matter. Inde Navarrette plays the inverted object of affection and it's her creepy physical presence and subtle facial expressions bathed in shadows which make for a highly effective horror premise. The sound design is solid, while the movie itself is lit very sparsely, leaving much of the finer detail to the imagination.

4 wish willows out of 5

Mother Mary (2026)

Mother Mary is a pop artist at a point of crisis, who goes to her seamstress for a new look. The way this movie unfolds is exasperating and a test of divine patience as the two speak cryptically with one another while the audience struggles to keep up. There's a bit of a Lynchy thread running through it, but don't get your hopes up. It's a mystery and a ghost story of sorts, yet it's the imagery that sticks in my head even though it defies logical narrative sense. Anne Hathaway sings all of the songs and performs her own choreography, which is the one bright spot in all this mess, but it belongs to a better movie.

2 halos out of 5

The Devil Wears Prada 2 (2026)

It's weird to think how 20 years has passed by in a blink. Feels like the first movie barely came out, now suddenly it's cemented as a 'classic.' Everyone returning from the original has aged two decades but still looks great. Then you realize you've aged the same and you look like shit. It's a sobering fact.

Lots of things have changed in the past 20 years. Print media is obsolete, other roles have been made redundant. You get a few good character moments strewn here and there, but for the most part it's wearisome and lacks bite.

2 HR complaints out of 5

The Devil Wears Prada (2006)

A journalist applies to be a personal assistant to the domineering editor at a fashion magazine, where she's confronted with impossible standards and forced to change herself to fit the ideal and try to beat her at her own game.

What annoys about this movie is that it hinges on Anne Hathaway playing a "fat" girl with no style who is treated like shit until she decides to wear the right clothes and then suddenly she's "beautiful." It's fucking stupid. I've never understood fashion and I've never cared about it. A bunch of pretentious gits. But Meryl Streep is so good in the role, you can't help but enjoy it for what it is.

2½ clackers out of 5

Is God Is (2026)

Twin sisters, each disfigured in their own way, are quested by their dying mother to seek out the man who made them this way. It's an old fashioned revenge story paved with quirky characters and oddball sensibilities on their journey to self-discovery. It's so much better than I expected going into it.

3 socks filled with rocks out of 5

I Love Boosters (2026)

"Boosters" are shoplifters who steal designer clothes and sell them at a discount price. However, whatever you think this movie is about, it isn't. 

Filmmaker Boots Riley (Sorry to Bother You) crafts another surreal, absurdist high concept comedy with shades of slapstick, satire, sci-fi and horror, which defies any easy classification. It's bizarre and demented and unpredictable in all the right ways, but it also earns fashion points for being original and bold.

3½ skewed floors out of 5

Sorry to Bother You (2018)

A deeply weird film that seems like a shame to spoil in any way. It involves a broke man who becomes a telemarketer and tries to get ahead in the industry. Director Boots Riley has some pitch black sensibilities and this film is dripping in irony. Blending elements of surrealism and science fiction, you might not know where the hell it's going, but you'll certainly know when you get there.

3½ white voices out of 5

Animal Farm (1999)

Of all the various filmed versions of Orwell's dystopian novella, this one might be the most disturbing because of how uncanny valley it is to see this material adapted to live action. Through a combination of real livestock, puppetry and animatronics (courtesy of Jim Henson's Creature Shop), the effect is creepy as fuck, which is appropriate for the allegorical themes contained within. It tones down the political language, but despite the attractive way it's packaged, this is clearly not intended for young audiences. Somewhere in the dark recesses of my psyche, I always tend to conflate this film with The Island of Dr. Moreau.

2½ legs bad out of 5

Animal Farm (2025)

"All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others."

George Orwell adapted for family audiences. Except I would feel bad for any little kid who was dragged to see this. Not because it's bad, but because it's bleak and depressing as hell. Barnyard animals run away and form their own society founded on freedom and equality for all, which lasts for about a day before the pigs become corrupt with power while the rest of the animals are used as slave labor. It's an ambitious take on the authoritarian allegory of the novel, transposed to the modern era with overt political ties to corporate consumerism. I give it major props for what it attempts to do, at any rate.

I can't wait until they do a children's version of Nineteen Eighty-Four next.

2½ laughter houses out of 5

The Sheep Detectives (2026)

I love a good mystery. A kindly old shepherd is found murdered, and his flock, who he used to read detective novels to every night, take it upon themselves to solve the crime by nudging the unwitting humans in the right direction. It's a lot better than it sounds. Emotionally resonant and heavier than expected for a family film, it's surprisingly moving and likely to bring a tear to your ewe.

3½ clouds out of 5

Remarkably Bright Creatures (2026)

"Why can humans not use their millions of words to simply tell one another what they desire?"

A lonely, aging cleaning woman befriends the octopus in her aquarium's exhibit tank while training her impetuous young replacement. It's a light dramedy with some heavy themes, not likely to ruffle many feathers (or tangle any tentacles), but it's pleasant enough in its familiar execution.

3 camouflage patterns out of 5

Deep Water (2026)

Aw man, this movie had such potential to be great. After a fire breaks out in the plane's cargo hold, passengers brace for impact as they land in the open ocean. What's worse than surviving a plane crash? Fucking sharks. That's right, we have our requisite Jaws knockoff to meet our shitty shark quota this year.

Razzie favorite Renny Harlin brings us one of the most horrific depictions of a plane accident I've ever seen, and this movie actually had me weeping with emotion before the CGI sharks showed up and ruined it. Hey, even a broken clock is right twice a day. Damn this stupid shark movie for making me care.

2½ cigarettes out of 5

Apex (2026)

An adrenaline seeker finds herself being hunted in the Australian wilderness. We've seen this kind of cat and mouse chase a million times before, but what this film has to offer are gorgeous scenic vistas filtered through Netflix's color degradation system. It's a decent survival adventure thriller that held my attention the entire time, mostly due to how photogenic Charlize Theron remains. I give this film credit for making everything look painful and realistic.

3 whitewater rapids out of 5