Reminders of Him (2026)

A family drama about a woman returning home after serving 7 years in prison for the death of her boyfriend. She wishes to meet the daughter she never knew, though the guardians are protective of ever letting that happen. Like Colleen Hoover's other adapted works (It Ends with Us, Regretting You), it has a very specific feeling attached to it; almost a bit too gentle, given the gravity of the situation. There are predictable family dynamics and relationships at play, where everything is framed and lit beautifully and everyone is a 10. This is what I like to call a "normal" movie. It's very normie-coded, but that's okay.

2½ pigeons out of 5

Billy Madison (1995)

A completely spoiled, obnoxious, simple-minded moron is told he will have to go back and finish grade school in order to prove he is capable enough to take over the family business and save it from the evil asshole who would inherit it.

This was Adam Sandler's first major leading role, coming hot off his success from SNL, in which he pretty much played the same gibberish-speaking cretin. This stuff was funny back before it wore out its welcome and, in some ways, this is one of the best comedies Sandler ever made because it was still pure.

There are two ways to review a movie like this: One is with a critical eye and the other is based on how much I personally enjoyed it. How funny you find this is directly proportional to your willingness to laugh at utter stupidity. I find it fucking hilarious. It doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.

3 flaming bags of poop out of 5

Revenge of the Nerds II: Nerds in Paradise (1987)

All the fraternities are invited to a conference in Florida, where the Lambda Lambda Lambdas are promptly kicked out of the high scale accommodations and sent off with their tails between their legs by those mean ol' Alpha Betas.

It's ironic that these movies about nerds are so fucking stupid, but hey, it's all gravy anyway. How much you enjoy it will depend entirely on how much you can stomach certain bodily humor. No longer interested in sex, the nerds are getting kind of boring at this point. Honestly, the best thing going for it is the title. It conjures to mind a better version of what this movie could have been.

2 loogies from the soul out of 5

GET OUT [2017]

Funnyman Jordan Peele makes his directorial debut with the surprisingly witty and disturbing satire Get Out.
This socially conscious horror film tells of a black man who visits his white girlfriend's family for the first time and things get really feckin' weird.
It's satirical critiques on racism and elitism are very apparent but never weigh down the entertaining thrill ride that this is.  As a matter of fact, it's often quite humorous whether it be laugh out loud funny or leaves one in nervous confused laughter.  Peele's directing and writing is allowed to naturally unfold allowing the tension to build with frightening precision.  His love for cinema was very apparent with his Key & Peele sketch comedy work.  So it comes as no surprise that the director is quite comfortable with the medium and seals the deal as promising new film-maker.

4 bizarre late night jogs out of 5

SAVING MR. BANKS [2013]

John Lee Hancock's Saving Mr. Banks is an absolutely charming historical drama about Walt Disney struggling with author P.L. Travers to get the film rights to the studio classic Mary Poppins.
It's an interesting character study that's both heart-warming and surprisingly dark in areas that's largely based around the terrific performances from Emma Thompson and Tom Hanks.  At times it reeks of the Disney empire stroking it's inflated ego and gets a bit too predictably fluffy but when it's at it's best it's simply wonderful.

3½ fruit bowls for the swimming pool out of 5

CBGB [2013]

Director Randall Miller attempts to tackle the history of the rise of the infamous New York punk rock venue in CBGB. 

If you studied your American punk rock carefully, you're going to see all sorts of things to make you shudder, most of which are purely for time constraints and dramatic purposes.  With all that out of the way, I found it to be a mostly entertaining & engaging tale about the underdog doing what he does best and making a name for himself whether he likes it or not.  There's some distractingly unnecessary "'zine" framing & edits but Alan Rickman & Ashley Greene hold the entire film together with a special mention to Freddy Rodriguez as well.  It was probably a tale best left untouched but I gotta admit it could have been A LOT worse.  

3 dog shit surprises out of 5

THE CABIN IN THE WOODS [2012]

Director Drew Goddard of Buffy The Vampire Slayer & LOST teams up with co-writer Joss Whedon to craft a mighty fine horror film that dissects the genre and turns it on it's head over and over again.
The Cabin In The Woods is a fast-paced, hilariously gory film that will please horror movie buffs and Whedon/Goddard fans alike. It starts out like a run of the mill "kids in the scary woods" story but quickly takes a turn into something much smarter and twisted then the you could imagine. It tips it's hat to almost every type of horror film you can think of with the same type of humor and self-awareness of Scream. I can't say much more without ruining anything.
If you're a fan of the genre I can assure you, it will not disappoint.

4 Speakerphone hating crazies out of 5