Punch-Drunk Love (2002)

Adam Sandler plays Barry Egan, a lonely, anxious man full of repressed rage, who attempts to court romance while finding himself the subject of extortion. The title is apt because this movie washes over you with colors and sounds that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, as dark and fucked up as it all is boiling beneath the surface. An absurdist romantic tale that still remains my favorite Paul Thomas Anderson film and one of Sandler's best roles to date.

5 pudding cups out of 5

Pamela, A Love Story (2023)

First of all, I'm glad that this documentary "went there." It doesn't really shy away from any of the ugly parts of her life and embraces all the embarrassing details. I was also surprised how much nudity they included, since you figure at some point her sons would watch it (I was very relieved that they seem to have turned out well, despite all the shit they went through). That being said, with how raw and open she is about everything that happened to her, it's still shocking to me how a sex tape effectively ruined Pamela's life and career, yet became a stepping stone for the likes of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian. I feel like that's the most fucked up thing; that she never really got her due or was able to build and control her own image (similar to Marilyn Monroe, I suppose). I was actually very moved and proud of her for headlining Broadway as part of her "redemption arc." It's inspiring how she pulled herself together and still seems keen on working in the arts. She definitely needs more opportunities to keep her busy and stop her from regressing into more empty marriages.

3 centerfolds out of 5

Piece by Piece (2024)

Hip-hop mogul and producer Pharrell Williams inexplicably tells his life story through a documentary presented entirely in animated Lego form. Why? is the question I kept asking myself throughout. Pharrell experiences the world through synesthesia, which is a way of processing everything through color in the mind's eye. It's your typical, cookie-cutter rags to riches story, with the usual rise and fall (ever so brief) before inevitably coming back stronger than ever. Nevertheless, it contains a wide range of songs from his musical career and it succeeds by marrying the colorful images and catchy songs together. However, at the heart of it all, it still feels like a cynical ego-driven vanity project. I probably would have enjoyed this more as a series of music videos.

2½ Lego McNuggets out of 5

The Punisher: One Last Kill (2026)

Frank Castle wrestles with demons of his past and forced to go on a violent spree set to some heavy metal needle drops in this one-shot, standalone, hour-long Marvel Television Special Presentation. Mostly satisfying, after sitting through the lackluster second season of Daredevil: Born Again. Jon Bernthal is compelling to watch as the PTSD-addled veteran with nothing left to lose. Funny that he also co-wrote and starred in a thematically similar one-off episode of The Bear that unfolds in much the same gritty, guerilla-style fashion (which makes it especially bizarre that they were both released within a week of each other). It's a very simple story and I appreciated that it wasn't moralistic or preachy in any way, although it does make me feel about as empty as Frank Castle. It neither moves the needle nor overstays its welcome, but mostly functions as a bridge to The Punisher's appearance in the MCU.

3 headshots out of 5

Passenger (2026)

A haunted figure who roams the side of the highway stalks a young couple who have recently dedicated themselves to life on the road. It's pretty rote, straightforward horror which held my interest but is easily forgotten by day.

1½ St. Christopher pendants out of 5

Protector (2025)

Milla Jovovich enters her Jason Statham era. She needs a new nickname now. The Mill? Jovie? I'll work on it. After her daughter is kidnapped, an ex-Special Forces soldier infiltrates a trafficking ring, in this Taken-like scenario. It's an ultra-violent action thriller that gets bloody quick, but it's full of weird pacing, slow exposition and poor acting skills. It gets laughably bad at times, but it's the kind of movie you could have a lot of fun with under the right influence.

There is a great, dark reveal at the end that saved it from POS status for me.

2 kill boxes out of 5

The Pout-Pout Fish (2026)

An ocean pout, cursed with a hard glower and greeted every day by other creatures telling him to "cheer up," learns to avoid oceankind, until one day his home is destroyed and he teams up with a hyperactive young seadragon to search for a mythical shimmering fish that will help grant their wishes. I wasn't expecting much from this, though I appreciated the concept of someone being judged for the way they look, but it devolves into the same, usual, mindless, colorful fare for kiddies, lacking in any charm or identity of its own. When did children's movies start feeling so condescending? Or was it always like this?

1 Bull Shark out of 5

Project Hail Mary (2026)

A man wakes up all alone on a spacecraft with no memory of who he is or how he got there. All the onboard crew is dead, he's floating adrift in space, and the stars are apparently dying. The trailers spoil what's to come, but I won't do that here. This is a voyage of wonder and discovery you must take alone.

Powerhouse directing duo Lord and Miller spin a yarn as old as time, Ryan Gosling remains effortlessly effusive, and while most of the science flies over my head, it's emotionally intelligent to boot. A safe bet for best of the year.

4½ fist bumps out of 5

Psycho Killer (2026)

Reeling after the death of her husband at the hands of a serial killer known as the "Satanic Slasher," a highway patrol officer becomes obsessed with trying to stop him. It's a straightforward slasher flick that's about as basic as it gets. No finesse. Like a direct-to-video movie from 2009. I can only blame myself.

½ a bloody orgy out of 5

Primate (2025)

January is notorious for theaters dumping all the low-rated horror flicks on their schedule. This is about as basic a concept as you can get: a domesticated sign language chimp introduced into a human family unit becomes infected with rabies and goes on the offensive. The practical effects and gory kills are self-explanatory, although largely uninspired. It almost sounds as though it were scored by John Carpenter, so it has a dark menacing feel to it. If you've seen films like Link or Monkey Shines, you already know what to expect.

1½ "movie, bad" out of 5

The Predator Holiday Special (2018)

Santa Claus, his elves and his reindeer encounter a Predator at the North Pole. It's a two-minute stop-motion film included in the Blu-Ray special features for The Predator designed to promote the home release, which probably takes less time to watch than to nut. It's a fun, festive, bloody treat to fit the holiday.

3 forearm clasps out of 5

Note: Can be viewed here in its entirety for free.

Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio (2022)

"Oh, the pain. Life is such hideous pain."

Guillermo del Toro brings us his longstanding vision of Pinocchio as a lovingly crafted stop-motion production with all the stops. It's a masterpiece of design and one of the best looking films I've seen all year. I like how it goes beyond the original story to show us how Geppetto was inspired to build the puppet. It has that classic story tale feeling, like the original 1940 Disney animation, but it adds a certain pathos and darkness that was missing from that film. I wasn't expecting to be quite so moved by the end of it. I think it's just wonderful.

4½ hourglasses out of 5

Predator: Badlands (2025)

Predator goes full sci-fi, in a page ripped right out of Star Wars. In a complete departure from the rest of the franchise, it now has us rooting for the Yautja, who is on a mission to capture his latest trophy in the distant future. Despite not having any legs, Elle Fanning does a lot of the heavy lifting as half of a synthetic android who becomes an unlikely ally. Since there are no humans in this movie, the violence is minimal and has been downgraded to a PG-13 rating. It's a sci-fi adventure with very little horror elements, but somehow it works.

3 dynamic tree-os out of 5

Predator: Killer of Killers (2025)

An animated anthology of three films set in the Predator universe at different points in human history, including Viking times, feudal Japan and World War II. In short, the Animatrix of the Predator franchise. There's been a recent push to build up the backstory to Predator, mostly due to director Dan Trachtenberg, but I find these efforts rather boring. They're just intergalactic headhunters looking for trophies. It doesn't have to be that deep. No matter what point in history it is, it always feels like the same old story told over and over again...

1½ collars out of 5

Prey (2022)

A young Comanche hunter must prove herself as a warrior. She finds herself stalked by a cloaked dreadlocks-wearing headhunter. Yeah, it's a Predator prequel. Taking place in 1719, it basically trades the jungle scenery for the woodlands of the Great Plains. I enjoyed the new direction at first, although once it settles into its formulaic plot, my interest gradually began to dwindle, especially the overreliance on glaring CGI, which took me out of the moment.

Amber Midthunder is strikingly beautiful; that was my biggest takeaway.

2½ bog pits out of 5

The Predator (2018)

Shane Black (who had a small role in the original film) writes and directs this sequel to the franchise, which marks a bit of a return to form after Predators. 

After an alien ship crash-lands on Earth, a captured Predator escapes from a lab and wreaks havoc on the city, while a biologist and motley crew of rejects attempt to contain the threat. It's...fine. I struggle to get excited about these movies because it always seems to go down about the same. I'm being fairly generous with my rating here because I enjoy looking at Olivia Munn's face.

2 hounds out of 5

Predator: Dark Ages (2015)

An unofficial short film which I'm only reviewing because it's a skilled effort. Set during the Crusades, a group of Templar Knights are visited by a Predator. It's a simple premise and execution, although the Predator looks a bit beefy, like a latter-day Jason. The acting is decent even though the lack of budget shows. It's very low tech, but no worse than some of the official entries.

1½ swordpoints out of 5

Note: This fan film can be viewed here in its entirety.

Predator (1987)

Deep in the Central American jungles, the hunters realize they're being hunted by invisible creatures using thermal imaging vision to track their every move. 

I've never been the biggest fan of the Predator franchise, yet there must be something about it that keeps audiences coming back. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Carl Weathers head this sci-fi/horror fest, which lend to its lasting appeal. There's no denying the creature designs are cool, but it's a shallow action flick that was not able to be matched by its lesser sequel. The whole thing feels so clearly inspired by Aliens, they would eventually do battle together one day.

3 CHOPPAS out of 5

A Puppet Master Halloween II (2025)

Attempting to build upon the techniques employed in the short film, this unofficial fan production manages to feel like a later entry in the Puppet Master series even though it doesn't really do anything interesting with it. It's a competent tech exercise, but about the equivalent of playing with dolls.

1 puppet movie too many out of 5

Note: The film can be viewed here for free.

A Puppet Master Halloween (2019)

This fan film demonstrates how easily these films can be reproduced using low tech methods to replicate the original designs. The result feels closer to the spirit of the original films than any of the newer films have achieved. Which just goes to show anyone can make these films. Not a lot happens here, but it's a nice proof of concept.

2 dossiers out of 5

Note: The special can be viewed here for free.