The Mandalorian and Grogu (2026)

It's been 7 years since the last theatrical Star Wars release. Since then, there have been 7 different live-action Star Wars TV shows released on Disney+, including The Mandalorian. Set several years after Return of the Jedi, the series follows bounty hunter Din Djarin and his apprentice Grogu (colloquially known as "Baby Yoda") in their adventures across the galaxy. The first two seasons were great, and felt like a return to the raw and gritty side of Star Wars seen in the original 1977 release. Their further adventures were stitched between The Book of Boba Fett (technically season 2.5) and season 3, at which point it burned through its goodwill and felt like there was no real direction for the future. After taking a few years off, creator Jon Favreau brings us this self-contained standalone story, which could easily be dubbed season 4.

Grogu (50 years of age) still hasn't grown up and suffers from a distinct lack of character development, which mostly hinges on being cute. And cute he is. The puppetry and practical effects are to be commended because it feels like it could have been crafted in the '80s. Meanwhile, Mando is a man of few words and even fewer facetime. The duo are sent on a mission to retrieve Jabba the Hutt's son and feature in largely generic set pieces. Grogu is by far the more interesting character and he shines whenever he's on screen. The best part is easily a wordless sequence that takes place late in the film. In the end, we still know nothing about these characters and we are no better for it. Still, I enjoy this stuff more than the self-seriousness of Andor. This is the way.

3 plot armors out of 5

Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)

J.J. Abrams is inconceivably, ill-advisedly back in the director's chair (after a last minute shake-up in plans when Colin Trevorrow backed out) and attempts to course-correct the universe back to where The Force Awakens left it. Consequently, it feels like a push and pull between two different creative forces at war with each other, and the trilogy does not feel as satisfyingly consistent or tied together as it could have been had they actually plotted out its three-film structure (or better yet, followed Lucas's original outlines) before embarking on this fool's errand. Rey has now taken up the mantle of resident Jedi and attempts to do battle with the ghost of Star Wars past. They position her as the next savior for the future of the franchise, which is all this trilogy ever set out to do. At the end of the day, it manages to be a competent enough film with standard entertainment value that doesn't attempt to ruffle many feathers. The series is neither better nor worse for it; it simply is.

3 "They fly now?!" out of 5

Note: For an alternate version of what Episode 9 could have been, check out Trevorrow's original draft, entitled "Duel of the Fates."

Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)

This might be going against the grain of popular fan-thinking, but I actually preferred this installment to The Force Awakens. It attempted to do something different with the Star Wars brand (just like George Lucas set out to do with his prequel trilogy), whereas J.J. Abrams was more concerned with repeating the past successes and making sure everyone still liked him at the end of it, but did nothing revolutionary to make itself stand out from the rest of the series. This film does the opposite and subverts the viewer's expectations, and it's thrilling as long as you're open enough to accepting change. It's too bad Abrams ended up retconning most of it for the divisive third entry.

4 swigs of green milk out of 5

The LEGO Star Wars Holiday Special (2020)

Star Wars celebrates its rich legacy by attempting to correct the mistakes of the past and issue out a new Holiday Special to wipe out the woeful memories of that last attempt. The result is a bit uneven, but it's a cheeky homage in trademark LEGO humor that allows it to double down on the lore and get away with jokes at the expense of the franchise without ever taking it too seriously.

Following the events of The Rise of Skywalker, Rey learns that on Life Day, she is able to jump through portals to visit key moments in the Star Wars saga (and mess up the entire timeline along the way). It's a fun plot device to see classic scenes recreated in LEGO form while also allowing for characters from different eras to co-exist side by side. It's far from perfect, but it's a cute way to tie together the whole franchise.

3 "participation trophies for Jedi, there are not" out of 5

ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY [2016]

Taking a slight detour from the established Skywalker family Star Wars stories, director Gareth Edwards' Rogue One remains in the same universe but delivers a far darker and violent tone.
In what is essentially a footnote in the original saga, the film tells the story of the scoundrels rebelling against the Rebels, as they go on a dangerous mission to retrieve the plans of the infamous Death Star.
Filled with all sorts of familiar faces, bridging the gaps between the two sets of trilogies, the film clearly panders to it's fans and with a quality film like this it's easy to take in.  Edwards relishes in playing in an already well-established series but he gives it his own stamp of gritty chaos that feels fresh to the universe.  There's a bit much going on in the beginning but once the action starts up it all swiftly comes together as a damned fine pulpy sci-fi thriller.

4 not very nice days on the beach out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE VII - THE FORCE AWAKENS [2015]

After retooling the premise of the Star Trek series, sci-fi nerds were very cautious approaching director J.J. Abrams' much-hyped continuation of the Star Wars saga, coming 38 years after the original film.
Fortunately Abrams & co. deliver the popcorn space opera awesomeness for Episode VII: The Force Awakens.
Set thirty years after Return of the Jedi, with the Empire defeated, a powerful new threat rises, known as the First Order and clashes with the Resistance, comprised of faces both familiar and new.
This gorgeous looking thrill-ride captures all the excitement of Lucas' films while capturing Abrams' edgier flavor but never sacrificing any of the fun (or going overboard with his trademark lens flare).  The casting is wonderful and even though I'm familiar with nearly all the names, it's the one who I didn't know that stood out the most: Daisy Ridley as the ass-kicking scavenger Rey.  It mirrors the events of the original film, giving it a history repeats itself feel but as it comes to a conclusion we're promised a brand new direction that's sure to surprise with flying colors.
"Chewie, we're home" indeed.

4 big hairy things out of 5

JEDI JUNKIES [2010]

Mark Edlitz's low budget documentary, Jedi Junkies takes a bizarre look at the mental illness that is Star Wars obsession.
It explores some more interesting folks who use their own creativity to soothe their fandom, while others have no thinking brain of their own and are just plain crazy, making it occasionally disturbing and sad.  It interviews celebrities, fans, Slave Princess Leia cosplayers galore and for a deeper insight to these psychiatric disorders: professional therapists.
It's not particularly mesmerizing to see all these people talk nor is it much in the way of entertainment (with the exception of those guys behind the Chad Vader web series).  In the end, it feels like a poor man's version of Trekkies, which in itself is a circus sideshow.

2 Sith Lords In A Supermarket out of 5

FANBOYS [2009]

It's the year 1998 and a group of Star Wars nerds decide to steal a workprint of The Phantom Menace for their terminally ill friend.  

Kyle Newman's Fanboys had potential to be stupidly funny but instead the studio interfered, hacked it up, failed and then tried to put it back together again resulting in something resembling Womp Rat crap.  Signs of life shine through the mess but never enough to produce anything wonderful.  Star Wars fans will get a few chuckles out of the in-jokes and gaggle of cameos from Star Wars alumni & celebrity fans but the rest is just simply not funny.  A real waste of a funny premise.

2 two-timing Shatners out of 5

STAR WARS - THE CLONE WARS [2008]

Wow.  What a way to leave a sour taste in one's mouth when completing a run of Star Wars films.

Serving as sort of like a "further adventures of...", The Clone Wars is a CGI animated film that's set during the "prequel" days.

Directed by Dave Filoni (Avatar: The Last Airbender), the film makes you realize just how much of a creative spark Lucas added to his lacklustre prequel films.  It might have some interesting character designs that are pretty reminiscent of the old Thunderbirds marionettes but the dialogue is outrageously bland, the action scenes have no soul to them and the whole set-up is frustratingly annoying.  As a Saturday morning cartoon it might work, as a feature film it's an insult to movie-goers.  

1 lack of title scrolls out of 5

For an alternate expanded review of this film check out The Nut Box.

STAR WARS - EPISODE VI - RETURN OF THE JEDI [1983]

The sixth installment of George Lucas' Star Wars saga, Return Of The Jedi, is probably the chapter I have the most fondest childhood memories of.

However over the years director Richard Marquand's film doesn't stand up as well as the it's classic predecessor.  It feels as it's already acknowledged who these characters are and waste no time on any sort of development, instead focus on some insanely cool action pieces and creepy, crawly puppet work.  It's not exactly a work of art but it is highly entertaining and imaginative, so you get exactly what you should expect.

3½ unamed, teddy bear like creatures named by marketing whores out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE V - THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK [1980]

Irvin Kershner assumes director's duties in place of storywriter George Lucas for the fifth instalment in the Star Wars saga, The Empire Strikes Back.

Widely considered the best of the series, the film is a bold, big space opera sweeping with melodrama, romanticism and big ol' space ships firing lasers.  While it is the series' best film, it can't stand on it's own with no real beginning or end to the story.  The cold, harsh planet Hoth at the beginning of the film reflects the dread and  darkness of the rest of the story.  A great achievement in Star Wars history that outdoes the original on every level.  

...and yeah, John Williams' Imperial March theme is feckin' awesome. 

4 asteroid potatoes out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE IV - A NEW HOPE [1977]

The one that started it all.  A curse to some.  A blessing to others.  A New Hope is the first film, while still the fourth film in the groundbreaking Star Wars saga's chronology.

Carried by some exciting new effects (including some dazzling spaceship dogfights), a bar filled with bizarre looking aliens and a battlestation the size of a moon.  It brought the brainless sci-fi pulp style of storytelling back into the mainstream paving the way for many copycats to come after it.   Sure the dialogue is terrible, the pacing gets really bumpy in the final 30 minutes and Mark Hamill is quite frankly abysmal but it's the type of fun that makes me think of sugary breakfast cereal.  

3½ droids you were looking for out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE III - REVENGE OF THE SITH [2005]

The third installment of George Lucas' Star Wars saga, Revenge Of The Sith, is easily the best of the "prequel" trilogy.

Sure the hokey dialogue and flatlining acting is still firmly intact but it manages to pack in quite a powerful punch with it's melodrama and dazzling action sequences.  Visually the film is a masterpiece with it's solid colors and beautifully rendered backgrounds.  The final hour sends haunted chills down my spine as it's like watching your childhood's imagination being written before your very eyes.  It's great popcorn entertainment that doesn't end with a smile on it's face.

3 uber-aging out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE II - ATTACK OF THE CLONES [2002]

Hayden Christiansen pouts and then pouts some more as Anakin Skywalker in the 2nd installment of the Star Wars space opera, Attack Of The Clones.

It's a slight improvement (although light years dumber) from the first film in the action but suffers greatly from Christiansen & Natalie Portman's awkward acting and terribly written love scenes that make daytime soap operas look like Shakespeare.  Horrible moments aside, Clones returns to the fun side of Star Wars that make you feel like a wide-eyed little kid again.  One just wishes that George Lucas would stand back and allow someone else in the writers & director's seat.  Still, Christopher Lee with a lightsaber is pretty fucking cool.

2 Jar-Jar's Big Adventures out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE I - THE PHANTOM MENACE [1999]

The Phantom Menace, the first part of the Star Wars prequel trilogy, is widely considered a major dud by dedicated fans and with good reason. 

It's 2 ½ hours of a story that could have easily been wrapped up in a minute over the famous Star Wars title scroll, instead we're treated to a poorly written film about a not so intriguing taxes on trade dispute story.  A few entertaining action sequences keep you from completely nodding off but the hope for better acting, characters and dialogue is never met.  It becomes quite clear that the original trilogy's greatest strength was the chemistry and performances of it's core cast, which this film completely lacks, with the exception of Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor doing the best with what they have to work with.

1½  folks from Brodo Asogi out of 5

The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978)

Sweet Jesus.
I had never seen this before, but I finally decided it was time to see for myself what the fuss was all about that would make Lucas himself want to go out and personally destroy every last remaining copy in existence.
I laughed, I cried, I cried some more...in fact, I spent a great deal of this movie crying. Half the special is in pantomime because it's just Wookiees walking around wailing at each other. No subtitles, nothing. I felt like I was watching some sort of perverse nature program. Is this really the best they could come up with?
So does it live up to its reputation? Yes, in spades. Is that necessarily a bad thing? Of course not. It's Star Wars. Fans eat up this garbage. I'd say you're better off just watching the Mark Hamill episode of The Muppet Show.

1 have a nice Life Day out of 5

The People vs. George Lucas (2010)

Here's a novel idea for a documentary: have a bunch of fans lash out at the creator of their favorite franchise and watch how they bite the hand that feeds them. Kind of takes on an interesting debate as to whether art belongs to the public or whether the Inventor has a right to tweak and deny his original vision. As an impartial viewer (who has enjoyed the movies for what they're worth), I find it fascinating how ambivalent their feelings turn; as to whether Lucas owes it to his fans to cater these movies for them or if he's right re-inventing and introducing them to new and younger audiences. Of course, the debate never reaches an end. Mainly focuses on the special editions and the prequel trilogy, but touches briefly on Indy 4, too.

3 internally conflicted fans out of 5