Knives Out (2019)

Who killed Christopher Plummer? Rian Johnson writes and directs this twisty whodunnit where solving the murder is only half the story, and like all great detective fiction, there are layers to the mystery which keep you guessing. Daniel Craig (donning a thick Southern drawl) heads the investigation as famed detective Beniot Blanc, the Poirot of the South. It's an enormously entertaining ride, filled with twists and turns, humor and heart, and a deeply tangled web, featuring an all-star cast all on their A-game. Satisfying from top to bottom.

4 donut holes out of 5

The Blues Brothers (1980)

One of the most successful movies based on a Saturday Night Live musical sketch featured John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd as Jake and Elwood Blues. Recently paroled, and looking to get back in good graces, they're on a mission from God to prevent the foreclosure of the Catholic orphanage where they were raised, all the while being on the run from cops, neo-Nazis, a country band and a mystery woman out for blood. The music is great, the spirit is anarchic, and it's just a fun time for all involved. Contains some of the most expensive action sequences ever filmed, not to mention fabulous cameos from legendary music performers. This is a time capsule worth uncovering.

5 police chases out of 5

Jim Henson: Idea Man (2024)

A retrospective on the life of Jim Henson, chronicling his rise as a filmmaker and puppeteer to the creation of his Muppets and Sesame Street all the way to The Dark Crystal and Labyrinth. A lot of focus is spent on his wife, Jane, who helped to support him throughout. I found it enjoyable, but as an overview, it merely scratches the surface and doesn't quite capture the full spectrum of Henson's life and career. It focuses a lot on the early years and glosses over the latter period. I would have liked to see it go even deeper, but it functions well as a primer to the man and his legendary career. In particular, all of the behind-the-scenes footage of Jim and Frank Oz ad-libbing is gold. (That was always one of my favorite special features on The Muppet Movie DVD.)

3 ping pong balls out of 5

Muppets from Space (1999)

Gonzo, the lonely, misunderstood, self-described "weirdo," contemplates his place in the world and where he belongs. Continuing off of a seed planted in The Muppet Movie ("I'm Going to Go Back There Someday"), we finally get our Gonzo-centric movie. While logic would dictate that this movie takes place in space, the majority of it is actually set at a top secret government facility, which captures Gonzo, prompting the rest of the Muppets to break him out.

While technically a well-made Muppet movie, the poor reception of this film led to the brand scaling back and being relegated to TV and direct-to-video productions for awhile, and it wasn't until 2011 that the Muppets were given another chance at their next big theatrical outing.

2½ whatevers out of 5

Note: If you get ahold of the DVD, it contains the most fun audio commentary I've ever heard with the Muppets themselves in a special MST3K silhouette style. It actually ends up being more entertaining than the movie itself.

Muppet Treasure Island (1996)

Riding high on the sails of Muppet Christmas Carol, Brian Henson sets out to adapt the next great literary classic. Full of swashbuckling adventure at sea, old treasure maps, chests full of pirate's gold and a legendary over-the-top performance by Tim Curry as Long John Silver, it's fun for all ages. Sadly, the material does not totally mesh well with the Muppets' sense of humor, and while it's full of colorful characters, skillful puppeteering and a memorable seafaring backdrop, it lacks both the humor and heart which made past Henson productions successful. My biggest issue is that it kid-ifies the source material too much. The Muppets shouldn't have their edges sanded off and it shows. 

3 black spots out of 5

The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984)

The last of the Jim Henson Muppet movies before he passed (though he also directed Labyrinth and produced A Muppet Family Christmas for TV). This time, Frank Oz takes the reins in his solo directorial debut (having previously co-directed on The Dark Crystal). This one is full of so much heart and soul, you don't mind that it's of inferior quality to the first two. As always, the songs remain top notch. I think the key to the Muppets' longevity has always been the music. This film also provides our first look at the Muppet Babies, which became an animated hit on TV that same year. It's light-hearted fun for all.

3½ inter-species weddings out of 5

The Great Muppet Caper (1981)

While not quite as memorable as the original, Jim Henson's directorial debut is full of so many fun bits, one-liners and irreverent humor that you don't really mind. Taking the shape of an old fashioned movie musical with giant setpieces and film stars of old to complete the effect, the chemistry between this cast is like capturing lightning in a bottle. While the rest of the Muppet movies would vary in quality, these first two films remain the funniest and most quotable, and the songs are some of the best. Fun for kids and kid-shaped adults alike.

4 "we're making a movie!" out of 5

The Muppet Movie (1979)

Made at the height of their television domination, the Muppets' first foray onto the silver screen is all at once funny, heartwarming, weird and magical. This "origin story" of sorts is a musical road trip buddy comedy adventure where Kermit the Frog must make his way from the swamps of Florida to Hollywood, while he meets the rest of the Muppet crew along the way. Having recently experienced it in a movie theater, I can attest it still delights audiences five decades later. This movie persists because of the partnership and endless chemistry between Jim Henson and Frank Oz, who inhabit their felt characters with humanity and wit. Full of fun cameos from movie stars of old, this film still feels timeless 50 years later. While it may not be "perfect," it's still a joy to behold from beginning to end. For the lovers, dreamers, and like-minded.

5 rainbow connections out of 5

The Score (2001)

Nick Wells (De Niro) is a jazz club owner who exists in an almost exclusive mood-lighting environment when indoors. In addition to running his club (which he hardly does) he's a safe-cracking thief, a talent that he puts to use only if the situation satisfies his calculated risk assessment. After decades of such risk he's on the verge of giving up. But there's one final job to be done, the biggest 'score' of his life, which naturally comes with the biggest risk.
It's the type of film that I enjoyed, because it's well-made and the performances of the actors are all commendable, but have no desire to ever watch again. As a one-time thing it passed the hours just fine. It's a slow-boil, purposefully holding back the pace until the last half hour.

3 night shifts out of 5

I AM BIG BIRD: THE CAROLL SPINNEY STORY [2014]

I Am Big Bird tells the loving life-story of a man whose work people of all ages have enjoyed over the past six decades but few know his name or would even recognize him on the street.
Caroll Spinney, the man who gave life to Sesame Street's Big Bird & Oscar the Grouch, as shown in this film, was quite clearly the most thoughtful and sensitive of the original core group of Muppeteers.  Through animations, archived footage and multiple interviews with Spinney and the many people that surrounded him, we're given a surprisingly deeply heartfelt look into the man's life.  With documentaries I come to expect that they almost always have a huge effect on me but this one took me for an emotional spin and more.  Like many others, The Muppets have had a profound effect on their lives, so hearing about Big Bird contemplating suicide was worse than discovering Santa wasn't real.  What's probably most endearing about the man and the film about him is it's will to smile and continue to do so as long as it generates the same reaction from it's audience.

4 tearful reunions out of 5

INSIDE OUT [2015]

Disney/Pixar collaborations have always been good at making great films for both children & adults but never have they ever been as successful as they are with directors Pete Docter & Ronaldo Del Carmen's Inside Out.
It's set inside the mind of a young maturing girl where her leading emotions are personified into five colorful characters who work overtime to ease her into living in a new city.  The film works as a vibrantly enthusiastic children's film, filled with all sorts of wacky hijinks and instantly likeable characters that are sure to sell all sorts of plushies.  As for the adults, it's a brilliantly imaginative and deeply emotional study of the brain and how it all works, as it travels through the motions, thoughts, feelings, memories and just about anything you can hide up there.  As complicated as it is, it balances out the story to never feel like it's talking down to the children or dumbing it down for the adults and to say the least, how they went about it left me completely dumbfounded.  This instant classic had me laughing, crying and feeling everything in between.  

5 pizza delivery bears out of 5

The Stepford Wives (2004)

It’s both a new adaptation of the Ira Levin novel (1972) and a remake of the previous filmed version (1975), but it does nothing to further or respect the underlying principles upon which either was based. It throws a few gay guys into the mix, an addition that could've really tipped the balance in a dramatic way, but they’re as farcical as the rest of it.
Nicole is a good actress, so why does she make shit like this? Still, it’s not the vilest, most wasteful and unrewarding thing she's ever been involved with, if you know what I mean.

0½ an energizer out of 5

Little Shop of Horrors (1986)

The musical comedy horror genre is distressingly underpopulated. Based on a musical that was based on the 1960s movie of the same name, Little Shop of Horrors offers campy scares, lots of laughs, and surprisingly catchy tunes. The music is a little dated, but somehow everything clicks together, from the motown Greek chorus to the wonderfully cheesy effects.

What really sells this film is its cast. Steve Martin is at his absolute funniest, Levi Stubb's voice acting is spectacular, and Rick Moranis makes Seymour work in a way few actors could. It's not for everyone, but for those who like a side of music with their black comedy, it's something you can watch over and over again without getting bored. My only complaint is the ending, which is satisfying enough, but doesn't quite match the tone of the film. Look up the original the next time you give this one a watch.

4 long, slow root canals out of 5

THE DARK CRYSTAL [1982]

There really is nothing like Jim Henson & Frank Oz's morbid children's fantasy puppet extravaganza The Dark Crystal.
Heavily influenced by Tolkien and the spirituality of Seth Material, Henson & Oz based their story around Brian Froud's artwork and resulted in a stunning visual masterpiece with groundbreaking animatronic effects.  Unfortunately it's the story and characters that lack any real memorable personality and that's where it really hurts the film.  Regardless of it's heavy faults, the film remains a childhood favorite and is something I hold dear to my heart.

3½ podling slaves out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE VI - RETURN OF THE JEDI [1983]

The sixth installment of George Lucas' Star Wars saga, Return Of The Jedi, is probably the chapter I have the most fondest childhood memories of.

However over the years director Richard Marquand's film doesn't stand up as well as the it's classic predecessor.  It feels as it's already acknowledged who these characters are and waste no time on any sort of development, instead focus on some insanely cool action pieces and creepy, crawly puppet work.  It's not exactly a work of art but it is highly entertaining and imaginative, so you get exactly what you should expect.

3½ unamed, teddy bear like creatures named by marketing whores out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE V - THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK [1980]

Irvin Kershner assumes director's duties in place of storywriter George Lucas for the fifth instalment in the Star Wars saga, The Empire Strikes Back.

Widely considered the best of the series, the film is a bold, big space opera sweeping with melodrama, romanticism and big ol' space ships firing lasers.  While it is the series' best film, it can't stand on it's own with no real beginning or end to the story.  The cold, harsh planet Hoth at the beginning of the film reflects the dread and  darkness of the rest of the story.  A great achievement in Star Wars history that outdoes the original on every level.  

...and yeah, John Williams' Imperial March theme is feckin' awesome. 

4 asteroid potatoes out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE III - REVENGE OF THE SITH [2005]

The third installment of George Lucas' Star Wars saga, Revenge Of The Sith, is easily the best of the "prequel" trilogy.

Sure the hokey dialogue and flatlining acting is still firmly intact but it manages to pack in quite a powerful punch with it's melodrama and dazzling action sequences.  Visually the film is a masterpiece with it's solid colors and beautifully rendered backgrounds.  The final hour sends haunted chills down my spine as it's like watching your childhood's imagination being written before your very eyes.  It's great popcorn entertainment that doesn't end with a smile on it's face.

3 uber-aging out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE II - ATTACK OF THE CLONES [2002]

Hayden Christiansen pouts and then pouts some more as Anakin Skywalker in the 2nd installment of the Star Wars space opera, Attack Of The Clones.

It's a slight improvement (although light years dumber) from the first film in the action but suffers greatly from Christiansen & Natalie Portman's awkward acting and terribly written love scenes that make daytime soap operas look like Shakespeare.  Horrible moments aside, Clones returns to the fun side of Star Wars that make you feel like a wide-eyed little kid again.  One just wishes that George Lucas would stand back and allow someone else in the writers & director's seat.  Still, Christopher Lee with a lightsaber is pretty fucking cool.

2 Jar-Jar's Big Adventures out of 5

STAR WARS - EPISODE I - THE PHANTOM MENACE [1999]

The Phantom Menace, the first part of the Star Wars prequel trilogy, is widely considered a major dud by dedicated fans and with good reason. 

It's 2 ½ hours of a story that could have easily been wrapped up in a minute over the famous Star Wars title scroll, instead we're treated to a poorly written film about a not so intriguing taxes on trade dispute story.  A few entertaining action sequences keep you from completely nodding off but the hope for better acting, characters and dialogue is never met.  It becomes quite clear that the original trilogy's greatest strength was the chemistry and performances of it's core cast, which this film completely lacks, with the exception of Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor doing the best with what they have to work with.

1½  folks from Brodo Asogi out of 5

Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas (1977)

Combining traditional puppetry and marionette work, this intimate production from Jim Henson Company crafts a beautifully lavish setting for the world of Emmett Otter. It's a sentimental, well-told story, however it lacks the brand of humor that gave the Muppets their edge. Still, it's full of fun, toe-tapping jigs and deserves to be considered a classic in its own right.

3.5 Riverbottom Nightmare Gangs out of 5