A Puppet Master Halloween II (2025)

Attempting to build upon the techniques employed in the short film, this unofficial fan production manages to feel like a later entry in the Puppet Master series even though it doesn't really do anything interesting with it. It's a competent tech exercise, but about the equivalent of playing with dolls.

1 puppet movie too many out of 5

Note: The film can be viewed here for free.

A Puppet Master Halloween (2019)

This fan film demonstrates how easily these films can be reproduced using low tech methods to replicate the original designs. The result feels closer to the spirit of the original films than any of the newer films have achieved. Which just goes to show anyone can make these films. Not a lot happens here, but it's a nice proof of concept.

2 dossiers out of 5

Note: The special can be viewed here for free.

Puppet Master Revival (2022)

This feature-length fan film uses replicas of the original puppets that feels as authentically low tech as any of the actual films have captured. Unfortunately, it's so convincing at doing the real thing, that it's just as annoying as some of the worse entries, especially the stock "comic relief" character. Regardless, it's a worthy effort, laudable for what it's able to achieve on no budget at all.

1½ auctioned toys out of 5

Note: The film can be viewed here for free.

Puppet Master: Doktor Death (2022)

Intended to be the second in a series of spin-offs featuring standalone characters from the Puppet Master universe, ironically enough, this ended up being the death knell of the series. For now, anyway. This one centers on one of the characters from Retro Puppet Master, something that literally nobody asked for. The doll turns up in a nursing home facility where it starts killing off the elderly residents. It actually reminded me a lot of one of the other spin-offs from the Demonic Toys universe, Jack Attack.

1 tentpole out of 5

And now, I've finally completed this project that I began nearly 15 years ago. 

I can rest easy now. Until the next piece of shit comes along...

Blade: The Iron Cross (2020)

A new spin-off of Puppet Master that is once again set during the Nazi period, as if anyone was clamoring for that. Blade was always the coolest puppet and the face of the franchise, so this should have been a slam dunk, but it mostly suffers from the poor pacing and lack of action as the other recent films in the series. This time, a young woman becomes intrinsically linked to the puppet.

½ a chubby from all the nudity out of 5

Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich (2018)

A soft "reboot" of the series attempts to recruit some B-listers to class up the joint. This is not a good film, but if you're comparing it to the ones that directly preceded it, it's a fucking work of art. It replaces the design of the puppets with worse ones, but the production value is high and there is an attempt at dark humor, even though it falls flat. It reminds me more of the attempts to reboot The Toxic Avenger or Leprechaun, which loses all of what made the originals great. Unfortunately, it makes the same mistake as Puppet Master II by making Toulon and the puppets evil, rather than the agents of good.

Plans to continue this offshoot fell through, so it reverted back to the original series and this remains just another "entry" without continuity to the next.

1½ pisses on your own head out of 5

Puppet Master: Blitzkrieg Massacre (2018)

AKA: Full Moon's Bunker of Blood: Chapter 1

A random collection of death scenes from the Puppet Master series thrown together haphazardly and slapped on with a new title to make a quick buck. It doesn't even make an effort to try and tell a cohesive story like The Legacy; it's a cheap entry that serves as a "greatest hits" package wrapped in a comic book framing device meant to evoke Creepshow. Despite the title, it doesn't just focus on the Nazi years, it covers the whole spectrum of the series. This was so awful, I went back and retroactively raised my rating on the last film.

0 dollars spent out of 5

Puppet Master: Axis Termination (2017)

It only took them 5 years later to pay off the "cliffhanger" at the end of Axis Rising (which ironically wipes the slate clean). Luckily, this is the last of the shit. Well, not really. But at least the "Axis" trilogy finally comes to a close.

These movies should be awesome. After all, it's Puppets vs. Fascists. But they are so uninspired and dull. Not only do I hate Nazis, I hate movies about Nazis. 

This trilogy makes me question why I even liked this series in the first place.

½ a vial of Re-Animator fluid

Puppet Master X: Axis Rising (2012)

The 10th Puppet Master entry (not counting the crossover) continues where Axis of Evil left off, somewhat. Continuity is all over the place with this series and the actors have been recast. Charles Band returns to the director's chair, which is a slight improvement, since he created this franchise. However, still no stop-motion, so the characters barely move, and it's still a boring storyline. Why they choose to only make prequels at this point is beyond me.

½ a pair of gun-tits

Puppet Master: Axis of Evil (2010)

Stepping into uncharted waters, I'm now going to nut the Puppet Master films I haven't seen before. This has been a long time coming, but I'm not a fan of Full Moon's modern era. Aside from the clips cribbed from the first movie, this shit is awful and lacks all the charm of the original era. In these ones, they don't even bother making the puppets stop-motion anymore. They are all in close-ups. It's the next level of cheapness which marks a new low for this series.

Worse yet, this is only part 1 of 3, as this was devised as its own trilogy.

0 acting lessons out of 5

Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys (2004)

With so much prior assembly required, what should have been an incredible concept ends up being a massive disappointment. Sadly, this was a SyFy Channel original movie, which means it was completely neutered for television standards. That means no gore, F-bombs or tits, so what's the point? Corey Feldman stars as André Toulon's great-grandnephew (which doesn't mean jack shit), but that doesn't make up for what potential was lost in this soulless corporate and creative compromise. On top of everything, this is considered more of a Christmas movie than horror. It attempts to pit the good guys (puppets) against the bad guys (toys), and it just plain sucks. Not even a self-censoring Baby Oopsie Daisy was enough to save this one.

½ a mechanical upgrade out of 5

Puppet Master: The Legacy (2003)

Barrel, meet bottom. It's hard to call this a proper 8th installment when it's just a clip show featuring scenes from the previous 7 movies, attempting to tie together all the disparate loose threads into some semblance of continuity. The only original footage comes in the form of a wraparound story involving a mercenary breaking into the Bodega Bay Inn (the site of the original film) in order to steal the secrets of reanimation. When I say there is nothing new here for fans of the series, I absolutely mean it. I guess it's a way to condense the series into a CliffNotes version, but why would you want to do that? These movies are much more fun to watch in their entirety.

½ a recycled film out of 5

Retro Puppet Master (1999)

The seventh film in the Puppet Master franchise is also a prequel to Part III, which confuses the muddled timeline of this series even more. This entry attempts to explain how young Toulon (Greg Sestero) first came upon the spell to animate his puppets, and features early prototypes of the characters we would all come to love. While there's not much new here for fans, this series remains charming simply because of how low-tech and no fuss it is.

This ended up being Guy Rolfe's last role, poor guy.

1½ Egyptian sorcerers out of 5

Curse of the Puppet Master (1998)

Picking up where I left off 13 years ago...

A mad scientist attempts to replicate André Toulon's experiment of creating life by transferring souls into hand-carved wooden puppets. Actual results vary. Originally intended as a "standalone" sequel to the franchise, it's pretty much been accepted into canon as they've continued to pump out sequels with regularity over the years. This is not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination, but it gets points for a couple of interesting ideas and some haunting imagery that leaves a lasting impression. Regardless, this is for diehard fans of the series only.

2 clockwork gears out of 5

Puppet Master 5: The Final Chapter (1994)

The final chapter my ass. They've milked this cash cow for all it's worth. However, this was the last one to be released under Charles Band's original Full Moon banner. (Full Moon lived on in other shapes and forms, but never as good as the period between '85-'95.)

Charged with the murders from the previous film, the young scientist (with puppets in tow) seeks to destroy the demon monster once and for all. I really soaked up these movies when I was younger because they were so anti-mainstream. The animation is top-notch; it almost feels real to me. In addition, the classic theme by Richard Band does a fantastic job of lulling me into this world. These movies may not be the greatest, but they hold a special place in my memory and I had a lot of fun revisiting them.

2.5 "And all the rest..." out of 5

Puppet Master 4: The Demon (1993)

A young scientist working on a top secret government project for artificial intelligence stumbles upon Toulon's old trunk and discovers his ancient Egyptian secrets of reanimation. At the same time, a demon is trying to stop those secrets from being released to the public and so unleashes its own evil army to finish off the puppets. Ends on somewhat of a cliffhanger, as 4 and 5 were shot concurrently.

2.5 Decapitrons out of 5

Puppet Master III: Toulon's Revenge (1991)

Flashback to 1941 where Toulon is a famous puppeteer who's caught the interest of the Nazis who are trying to perfect their reanimation formula for Hitler's Reich. This prequel is probably the best thing since the original and we have a new Toulon (Guy Rolfe) who nails the part just right. This time we have enemies that deserve to die, so these movies shift the puppets from the bad guys to the heroes, which proves to be a much better fit.

3 Six-Shooters out of 5

Puppet Master II (1991)

We learn a little more about the puppets and how they operate in this first sequel, which reveals the secret behind their animation: brain tissue. As the puppets try and gather more of the precious fluid through killing, a new puppet master is pulling the strings... I really don't like how they made Toulon evil in this one, destroying the continuity between the rest of the series. Aside from that, there are a few good ideas therein, but all in all doesn't stand up to the original.

2.5 Leechwomen out of 5

Puppet Master (1989)

This popular series by imaginative low-budget label Full Moon Entertainment spawned a crapload of sequels but I'll primarily be focusing on the ones produced during the heyday of their brief direct-to-video reign.

Kindly old magician Andre Toulan (William Hickey, recalling to mind Vincent Price in Edward Scissorhands) brings his troupe of puppets to life in 1940s Germany and quickly ends himself when confronted by Nazi spies. Cut to present day where his trunk has been unearthed and a group of psychics are summoned to learn about them firsthand. Lots of weird imagery and fun puppet effects going on; most of the movie remains enshrouded in mystery, but I found it satisfying and intelligent in spite of the subject matter. The puppets themselves don't get a whole lot of exposure in this one, but that's what the sequels are for.

3.5 Blades out of 5