The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026)

What is it about Nintendo and Mario that continues to capture the imagination? Is it the colors, the character models, the music, or the simplistic but polished game design that keeps reinventing itself across every new generation?

Having recently revisited the first movie, I realized it didn't hold up as well as my initial viewing. It's a lot of bright colors and nostalgic music that feeds on memories of childhood. Similarly, this sequel crams in as much fan service as possible to the point where it feels like ADHD personified. It's the movie equivalent of a theme park ride that is as good as whatever happy memory you bring to it. Nothing compares to your own personal video game journeys.

2½ Star Fox crossovers out of 5

Mercy (2026)

Taking a page from the Minority Report pre-crime handbook, and set in the scary near-future (2029), the A.I. Justice System has charged a man of killing his wife, and he has only 90 minutes to prove his innocence or be executed in this sci-fi techno-thriller that plays out in real time. The catch is that it mostly takes place in a virtual courtroom, where he has to beat a 97.5% probability by gathering evidence from all the data uploaded to the internet at his disposal.

This could have easily turned into another screenlife War of the Worlds-type situation, but mercifully, it's handled a lot more competently. It's easy to get swept up in the logistics and breakneck pacing. It falters in the final third, but it's interesting enough to grab your attention and hold it there for its duration.

2½ gut instincts out of 5

Jurassic World: Dominion (2022)

"Jurassic World? Not a fan." -Dr. Ian Malcolm

Four years after the last catastrophe, dinosaurs and humans now co-exist. Sadly, all the wonder of this world seems to be missing now. Dinosaurs have become commonplace. Poaching is a thing, as well as black market dealings. The dinosaurs no longer seem as threatening as before, and conveniently always target the baddies. This is one of those movies that gradually wears out its welcome and becomes less enjoyable as it goes on. Ironically, it's the overexposure that saps its novelty. It no longer feels special anymore.

Then again, they got Sam Neill, Laura Dern and Jeff Goldblum to reunite for the first time since 1993, so what more could you ask? They have a diminished role in this—the last of the Chris Pratt trilogy of Jurassic World films—yet remain the only bright spot that bring any humanity to the proceedings.

This was originally billed as the "epic conclusion of the Jurassic era." But fear not...the dinosaurs will continue to roam the earth. Life, uh, finds a way.

2½ flaming locusts out of 5

Note: Having seen both the theatrical and extended editions, the extended is the superior option, although it adds 14 more minutes to this lumbering entry.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)

Time has passed since the park was rebooted and the dinosaurs have made it their home. A volcano is set to erupt on Isla Nubar and the animal activists (and shareholders) want to save the dinos, despite scientists like Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) warning for nature to take its course and get rid of the unholy abominations once and for all. And so back we go, into the belly of the beast...

These movies aren't rocket science. What you're going to get is nature turning on man, once more. It does enough right that it's passable, popcorn-munching entertainment, but that doesn't necessarily mean you're going to like it.

2½ clones out of 5

The Electric State (2025)

In an alternate timeline, Walt Disney's animatronics have given birth to the robot uprising, which leads to an all-out war between robots and humans, until Mr. Peanut (played by Woody Harrelson) signs a coalition with Bill Clinton. It sounds like I'm kidding, but I'm not. No wonder it cost $320 million for a direct-to-Netflix film. Most of that must have gone to keeping the lawsuits at bay.

While the above sounds like a wild premise, all that information is condensed within the first 7 minutes of the movie. The rest of the film involves a teenage girl and an affable cartoon robot on a mission to find her long-presumed-dead brother, alongside a scoundrel and his wisecracking sidekick. On paper, this all sounds awesome, but for some reason it doesn't really work. The execution is painfully average and somehow manages to feel slow and uneventful despite everything going on in it. There's just no reason some movies need to be over two hours long. Cut 30 minutes out and maybe it wouldn't feel so superfluous.

The graphic novel this was based on appears to be highly acclaimed however, so perhaps interested parties should seek that out instead.

2 Neural Bifurcation™s out of 5

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)

Returning from a lengthy absence (we won't talk about that), James Gunn completes his trilogy with flying colors that places the heart and soul back into Marvel's Cinematic Universe. Focusing on Rocket Raccoon's backstory, we are introduced to the High Evolutionary and Adam Warlock, as well as cuddly companions from Rocket's past. 

Like Deadpool, Guardians remains my favorite Marvel property due to its irreverent humor and winning heart (especially the chemistry between Drax and Mantis, who I will miss most of all), which set it apart from many of the superhero franchises which try so hard to be "cool" all the time. It's refreshing when all the characters feel flawed and sorta human (even the alien ones).

What I like most about this series is how it is (almost) separate from the MCU machine (the Guardians also feature in Avengers: Infinity War/Endgame and Thor: Love and Thunder, so it's not entirely self-contained), so you can watch Vol 1-3 as a trilogy of its own design (but don't forget the Holiday Special!). 

Most other things I have to say about this movie rely heavily on spoilers, but all I'll say is that while I was mostly satisfied with how it all ended, it left me with bittersweet feelings which prevent me from giving it a higher score.

3½ confusing car door designs out of 5

The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)

This one was pure fan service, but I didn't mind one bit. We all remember the 1993 version, right? This one blows it out of the water. Full of vibrant colors and lively worldbuilding, it succeeds in immersing you in the spirit of the games. The music especially helps to sell this nostalgia, though I wish they would have leaned into it even further. Feels like this movie had a lot to prove in order to distinguish itself from its prior cinematic failure, and personally, I think it's one of the better video game adaptations I've come across in recent memory, since it manages to pay homage to its origins while providing a "new" experience that anyone can jump into, young or old. Feels like it could easily spawn many sequels since this one barely touches upon the lore.

3 Tanooki Suits out of 5

The Garfield Movie (2024)

As a kid, I used to read Garfield comics religiously (along with Peanuts and Calvin & Hobbes), but besides the '80s cartoon and TV specials, none of the recent efforts to revive the character have ever seemed to get it right. I feel like they sanded down the edges here and made him as innocuous and dull as possible. All the cutesy-eye kitten stuff was okay, but besides the brief montage of him growing up, we don't really get to see too much of the true Garfield personality. It also really bothered me that Jon Arbuckle was so estranged from the events of this film, since he's always been a big part of why the comics worked for me. Instead, we're given this weird father-son dynamic that never existed in the comics and now appears to be a permanent staple of this reboot. I mean, I realize it's a family movie designed to appeal to kids, so I'm no longer the target audience. But that just makes me feel so fucking old and obsolete when I think back to all those countless hours I spent invested in those comics and televised adventures, only for them to reinvent the mythos and throw out the "canon."

Also, I don't know what voice Chris Pratt was trying to do here, but this wasn't it. And hiring Samuel L. Jackson to play his pop is just really weird. Even Odie's characterization seemed to be off, but whatever. I don't know why I'm investing so much of myself into this dumb shit. It's just a bummer all around.

1½ milk heists out of 5

The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special (2022)

Peter Quill is feeling blue around the holidays, so Drax and Mantis decide to cheer him up by kidnapping Kevin Bacon from Earth. This movie is so much fun and embraces all of what makes Guardians of the Galaxy special and stand out from the rest of the stale, well-treaded superhero fare. It has a simple joyous quality about it, and Drax and Mantis remain my two favorite lovable weirdos at the heart of this franchise. It wedges nicely between Guardians 2 and 3 and provides a nice reprieve from the cynical Marvel machine which only serves to set-up future tentpoles. This is one that can easily be enjoyed without much foreknowledge of the MCU. I also like that they had fun building off the Star Wars Holiday Special, which this clearly pokes fun at with its animated Yondu flashback sequence. Enormously maudlin but oh-so-charming, it celebrates the humor and the characters at the heart of it. At a tightly-paced 40 minutes, it's the perfect length for this type of throwback Christmas special, which makes it easy to revisit year after year.

4½ swirly red-and-white curly men out of 5

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 2 [2017]

Director James Gunn returns to the MCU for more immensely entertaining nuttiness in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2.
Continuing their galactic misadventures, the Guardians are on the run from a race of powerful aliens  of whom they stole from when they run into Peter Quill's long-lost father with a tempting proposition.
After the surprise of how good the first film actually was, this installment has a lot to live up to and it almost hits the mark.  Gunn has a lot to juggle and it's almost always successful with a few minor quibbles here and there.  It's jam-packed with plenty of humor, extravagant set-pieces, memorable characters you learn to love even more and plenty of emotion to form some serious lumps in your throat.  If you're a fan of the first then this one will deliver the goods with oddball personality and genuine heart.

3½ trash pandas out of 5

MOVIE 43 [2013]

Producer Charlie Wessler gathers together a band of embarrassed directors, including Peter Farrelly, James Gunn, Griffin Dunne, Brett Ratner and many more for his sketch comedy anthology Movie 43.  Depending on what country you're in will depend on what plot you'll get threading all the sketches together...for once, the U.S. cut is the best one.
It's basically a gaggle of juvenile humored sketches that constantly try to outdo each other in jokes about bodily fluids, sex, periods, incest and various forms of racism and sexism.  It's amazingly disgusting, vile and void of any sort of class.  With that being said, it's quite often just as funny as it is ridiculously stupid.  It's notoriously known as one of the worst films of all time but I wouldn't go that far.  I figure more was expected of it considering the huge cast of well-known actors involved, many of whom tried to unsuccessfully back out.

2 shitty car accidents out of 5

THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN [2016]

The Magnificent Seven is given the very unnecessary remake treatment by director Antoine Fuqua.
We all know the story by now but if not refer to ¡Three Amigos!, then add four and you get the general idea.
What Fuqua has made is a pretty solid shoot 'em up Western that is a rarity in this day and age, so I'll take what I can get.  However what he hasn't made is something that will stand the test of time like it's source material and other classic films in it's genre.  It's clear that the cast is having a great ol' time and in doing so it makes for a pretty entertaining ride for the viewer as well.  There's plenty of cheese and cringe-worthy moments but it's so briskly paced none of it is ever overly offensive to anyone afraid of losing brain cells.

3 card tricks out of 5

JURASSIC WORLD [2015]

Safety Not Guaranteed director Colin Trevorrow makes a huge career move with Jurassic World, the fourth film in the popular film franchise.
Returning to the island in the original film, the new Dino-park is fully functional and brimming with happy-go-lucky tourists ready to see reptiles devour other reptiles from the safety of the other side of the bars.  We all know where this is going and, boy, are we ever ready for it.  It never comes close to the terrifying magic of the first two films but finally after nearly 15 years, we're able to get rid of that bitter after-taste of the third film.  There's a few memorable pieces and potentially great ideas spread throughout it's cringe-worthy corniness and predictability.  It's big, dumb dino-fun that's purely out to razzle-dazzle those who are open to it.

3  poor little piggies who never made it home out of 5

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY [2014]

Disney took a huge risk producing a big budget comic book movie based on a little known Marvel comic book.  They took even a bigger risk by enlisting the unhinged James Gunn to direct Chris Pratt in the lead role.
Fortunately Guardians Of The Galaxy succeeds in nearly every way possible.
The final film in Marvel's Phase Two before Avengers: Age Of Ultron, GOTG sets up for a larger story to be seen in Phase 3 but holds up well on it's own.  Gunn blends his trademark wackiness quite well into a comfy balance of humor, heart and action all neatly placed in the correct spots of the narrative to keep things in check.  It's a fast-paced wildly imaginative treat that feels like Farscape buggered The Fifth Element up the arse to the musical sounds of the 70's.

4 great heroes named Kevin Bacon out of 5

THE LEGO MOVIE [2014]

From director/writers Phil Lord & Christopher Miller (the guys behind Clone High, Brooklyn Nine-Nine and the 21 Jumpstreet films), The Lego Movie seems like it would be one big commercial to sell more toys.
However with Lord & Miller's background one can expect a high-energy, colorfully told story with plenty of tongue-in-cheek moments of snappy dialogue and sight gags all wrapped in a big well-placed heart.
At times it's just a bit too schmalzty and simplistic to really be as smart as some of it's CGI animated counterparts but it's got enough flair to never lose it's enjoyability.
...and let's face it, folks, didn't we all want to see Batman for the douchey ass that he really is?

3 weird cat things out of 5

HER [2013]

Visionary film-maker Spike Jonze writers & directs her, a lonely drama aspiring for romanticism and sprinkled with just enough sci-fi to ground the concept in reality.
It studies the lack of human interaction in society today, our inability to properly socialize due to technology and at the core, just how desperate a lonely heart can get without ever realizing what's directly in front of it.  Joaquin Phoenix brings a masterful sincere performance to the table that is compelling, touching and sympathetic without ever becoming the type of creepy it could have easily been had it been in someone else's hands.  Complimented with some soft color palates, beautiful and non-distracting set & costume design and a powerfully elegant soundtrack, her deserves a round of enthusiastic applause from fans of Jonze's work.

4 sexy dead cats out of 5

THE FIVE-YEAR ENGAGEMENT [2012]

Director Nicholas Stoller adds another predictable yet charming funny film to his resume with the romantic comedy The Five-Year Engagement.

The chemistry between Jason Segel and Emily Blunt is great and never gets too mushy, with the help of some great supporting roles from Chris Pratt and Alison Brie.  With enough laughs and down-to-earth situations the film is a pretty safe bet for anyone that vomits at the the mere mention of rom-coms and needs something with just enough flair and attitude to ease the pain. 

3 Bunny Days out of 5