Jay Kelly (2025)

Clooney plays a successful actor (wink wink) going through an existential crisis, who takes an impromptu trip to Europe, while his entourage follows him wherever he goes. It's a very "inside baseball" look at the entertainment industry, occasionally meandering and self-indulgent, but performances are strong and it's easy to get caught up in the glitz. It didn't quite work its magic on me, but it's a solid effort and an examination of a life lived good enough.

3 slices of cheesecake out of 5

Paddington in Peru (2024)

After his aunt goes missing in Peru, Paddington must go back home to find her, as he gets mixed up with nuns and a riverboat captain on a quest to find El Dorado. If you're a fan of the others, it'll give you what you're looking for, but I didn't find myself as invested as the first two films and it hardly got an emotional response out of me. Most of the fun comes from Antonio Banderas as this entry's villainous lead. It's a cute adventure and the jungle scenery definitely pops on the big screen, but it's diminishing returns at this point.

2½ passport photos out of 5

Note: Emily Mortimer takes over the role of Mrs. Brown from Sally Hawkins, which probably accounts for why it feels so uneven compared to the others.

Paddington 2 (2017)

Paddington's second foray on the big screen picks up not long after the first film. Having fully integrated with his new found family, the titular talking bear takes up a series of odd jobs and is framed for a crime he didn't commit. This time around, Hugh Grant portrays the big bad as a clever master of disguise.

People seem to consider this one superior to the original (due to its 100% "fresh" score and a running gag in The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent), but it feels like a much more derivative family film and much less "grounded" in reality. While the humor and warmth is consistent and it remains wholesome and charming, it was massively overhyped for me compared to the original.

3 pop-up books out of 5

Paddington (2014)

An extremely charming British film based on the children's book series of the same name. A talking bear in a red bucket hat and rain slicker migrates from the jungles of Peru to a London railway station where he is discovered and subsequently taken in by the Brown family. What follows is essentially a fish out of water story where Paddington attempts to assimilate with urban life, while trying to avoid a tricky taxidermist (played by Nicole Kidman) looking for her next trophy. It's a heartwarming family film that's perfect for kids of all ages and manages to get the characterization of the books right.

3½ marmalade sandwiches out of 5

EDDIE THE EAGLE [2016]

For some odd reason director Dexter Fletcher & co. find it necessary to exaggerate an already unbelievable true story with Eddie the Eagle.
Inspired by British ski-jumper Eddie Edwards, the film follows his rise to fame as the most lovable personality to emerge from the 1988 Winter Olympics.
If they went so much to change the story, why couldn't they have avoided the endless amounts of underdog '80's sports movie clichés?  Maybe that's the point, if it is trying to emulate the films of it's time.  Thankfully Taron Egerton turns in a irresistible performance as the title subject, while Hugh Jackman is a ruggedly charming as ever as a drunken curmudgeon made up only for the film.  It's sweet enough to not leave a bitter aftertaste but leaves much to be desired.

3 dreams come true out of 5

THE LEGEND OF TARZAN [2016]

Director David Yates take a very brief break from the wizarding world of Hogwarts to visit the Lord of the Jungle in The Legend of Tarzan.
After years of living as a domesticated gentleman, Tarzan, along with his wife Jane, head back to the jungle to investigate some shady mining camps where his savage past creeps up on him, loin cloth and all.
It might be a fresh change from the usual summer aliens, robots and superheroes but Yates' film is an uninspired bore.  The characters are dull as dirt, the CGI is laughably artificial and Samuel L. Jackson's soul-brotha enunciation is awkwardly out of place.   Without a whole lot of rousing action sequences the glaring missteps are all the more apparent and hurt the clunky pacing even more.

2 adorable cat-ear hoodies out of 5

THE LADY IN THE VAN [2015]

The Madness of King George director Nicholas Hytner brings screenwriter Alan Bennett's 1999 stageplay The Lady in the Van to the screen.
It's a quaint little British story about a homeless woman, living in her van, that just happens to be stationed outside a playwright's driveway for 15 years.
There's plenty of harmless laughs to be had but when it needs to get get poignant there simply isn't enough to carry the emotional weight it calls for.  If not for Maggie Smith's incredible performance, as the eccentric van dweller, the film wouldn't be nearly as watchable as it is.  In fact, she's so damned good she largely overshadows Alex Jennings' somewhat flat character, who the viewer is supposed to be focusing on the most as it's his personality that sort of grows throughout the film.

3 cans of Catholic paint out of 5

BROOKLYN [2015]

Director John Crowley's adaptation of Colm Tóibín's novel, Brooklyn, is the type of lush, romantic period drama that proves just because it's all of the above doesn't mean it has to be melodramatic schmaltz.
It's the story about a young Irish woman who immigrates to the United States in the early '50's to find herself torn between what country and life she wishes to live with.
Once again lead actress Saoirse Ronan delivers a mesmerizing sophisticated performance that never tries to outperform her other equally talented cast-mates, including the amazing Jim Broadbent and Julie Walters.  Broken up into three distinct parts, the story brilliantly alters it's color palette and style of photography with such subtlety only your emotions will pick up on it.  It's a much-needed quiet little film that sits in the corner waiting for you to discover it for yourself.  The type of good old fashioned storytelling that remains timeless.

4½ barf buckets out of 5

HARRY POTTER & THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE [2009]

Director David Yates really lays down the dark & dismal in the sixth installment of the Harry Potter series, The Half-Blood Prince.
With Voldemort & his Dark-Eaters waging war on both the Wizarding and Muggle worlds, Harry learns more about the Dark Lord and how he came to be, as well as discovering disturbing evidence of how much the two are actually alike.  While the previous films were a healthy balance of style and substance, this one leans more towards the striking visuals making it  just too damned dark to be much fun.  When it does have a bit of a laugh it breaks the tone and feels ridiculously out of place.   Even the actors, apart from Alan Rickman and Jim Broadbent, don't seem to be up to par with their previous performances.  Still, it is perhaps one of the most important chapters in the series, seeing as it's tragic ending leads to the explosive conclusion.
I like to consider this the calm before the storm.

3 bumpy bridges out of 5

Doctor Who: The Curse of Fatal Death (1999)

If it's not already apparent from the title and picture above, Fatal Death is a parody. It was a skit made for Comic Relief, but it’s filled with love for the real deal, acted by people deserving of the accolade and written by Steven Moffat, who was no stranger to Dr. Who lore even then.
There's a running gag in the first half, but the second half is where the real treasure is found. What occurs throughout certainly isn't 'canon', but if it was Joanna Lumley would get my vote.

3 Dalek bumps out of 5

FILTH [2013]

Cass director John S. Baird adapts Irvine Welsh's crime novel Filth for the screen with James McAvoy playing the lead role with a grimy, enthusiastic unpleasantness that is difficult not to enjoy.
Like Welsh's other works, the dialogue is filled with Scottish slang and a thick accent to boot, making it difficult to decipher, so if you don't have the patience for that then this isnae th' movie fur ye, ye fuckin' boot.
McAvoy carries the weight of the film on his shoulders but never once does he let it show, with a savagely suffocating and hilariously disturbing performance that barely leaves room for Eddie Marsan, Jamie Bell and Imogen Poots to shine as well.  With it's sickly dark humor and deeply unsettling subject matter, Filth sometimes has trouble finding the right balance of both without feeling a little bit forced at times.

3½ of the same rules that apply of out of 5

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL [2008]

19 years after the last film, Steven Speilberg, George Lucas and Harrison Ford dust off the the whip & fedora for a forth round in the popular Indiana Jones series.
At the ripe ol' age of 66, Captain Ford looks surprisingly good and slips right back into his role with some minor but suitable creaks 'n groans.  The goods pretty much end right there though.
It lacks the heart, imagination and enthusiasm of the original films, even going so far as to nearly ditch the disjointed (yet highly entertaining) serial film like storytelling and almost becoming a coherent (yet painfully boring) straight up tale.
There's a few fun moments scattered throughout but not enough to stand the test of time as the original film does.

2 close encounters out of 5

Hot Fuzz (2007)

All coppers are basta- not quite all. From the Shaun of the Dead (2004) team comes a parody/homage to the Hollywood buddy cop movie. It has the same kind of wry in-jokes and references to other films and their own past projects, so watch Shaun first. It’ll be even funnier if you've watched Point Break, Bad Boys II, the Dirty Harry films and even The Wicker Man!
Pegg plays it (mostly) straight while Frost is once more the comedy gold.
The swear-box gets a good filling.

4 the greater good out of 5

Moulin Rouge! (2001)

A nauseating clusterfuck of styles that steals from everywhere and is occasionally innovative. It has some very irritating editing that made me want to stab my own eyes. Like the rest of Baz's work it's much too ham-fisted to be watched often.

1½ style over substance out of 5