The Moment (2026)

British pop singer Charli xcx pokes fun at her own image in this mockumentary satirizing the 'Brat Summer' phenomenon that took over the airwaves in 2024. Focusing on the planning and clashes behind the scenes in the run up to the concert tour, and how the label exploits the artist for its own financial gain, the whole thing feels obnoxious, stressful, anxiety-driven and unpleasant to sit through, but I guess it accurately captures a moment in time. I'm clearly not the target audience for this, but I struggle to see how fans would embrace this either. It's a bit like Spinal Tap or Popstar, except more depressing than funny.

1½ brat cards out of 5

THE LEGEND OF TARZAN [2016]

Director David Yates take a very brief break from the wizarding world of Hogwarts to visit the Lord of the Jungle in The Legend of Tarzan.
After years of living as a domesticated gentleman, Tarzan, along with his wife Jane, head back to the jungle to investigate some shady mining camps where his savage past creeps up on him, loin cloth and all.
It might be a fresh change from the usual summer aliens, robots and superheroes but Yates' film is an uninspired bore.  The characters are dull as dirt, the CGI is laughably artificial and Samuel L. Jackson's soul-brotha enunciation is awkwardly out of place.   Without a whole lot of rousing action sequences the glaring missteps are all the more apparent and hurt the clunky pacing even more.

2 adorable cat-ear hoodies out of 5

HIDDEN [2015]

Writer/directors The Duffer Brothers make their debut with the uniquely slow-burning epidemic thriller, Hidden.
A family of three have taken cover in a bomb shelter from deadly virus that's wiped out humanity and turned the rest of the survivors into killers known only as "Breathers".
What's unique about this little film, is 3/4 of it takes places in the bomb shelter and depends on captivating the audience with everything that could go wrong within the confines of the fallout shelter.  The so-called "Breathers" aren't seen or heard of until the final moments of the film, so "zombie" fans need to go elsewhere if they're seeking out a fast-paced gore-fest.  The lead performances help elevate the film into believability and raise the tension, which could have been a real bore had it not been executed with more care.   It's by no means a perfect film but does a fantastic job at holding one's attention with very little to work with.

3 dirty dollies out of 5

THE GIVER [2014]

Director Phillip Noyce comes in at the beginning of an over-abundance of films based on YA social science-fiction novels with Lois Lowry's The Giver.
In a nutshell (see what I did there?) the film is about a young boy, who resides in a seemingly perfect community, that learns all about the world that existed before this false utopia.  This is Jeff Bridges' passion project, seeing as he optioned the rights to the book over twenty years ago and has been attempting to get it made since and for the most part, the dedication shows.  However it's impossible to fit in all the themes, depth and subtleties of the novel without leaving out a great deal of it's purpose.  There's some really powerful moments, interesting techniques and ideas brought to the table in a cinematic sense but they don't all work to form a seamlessly coherent narrative.   It's aiming in the right direction and perhaps with a better director it might have hit it's mark

3 lies for personal amusement out of 5

DISCONNECT [2013]

Director Henry Alex Rubin's Disconnect is a riveting drama that does a fantastic job at intertwining several seemingly unrelated stories into a intense tale about the horrors of modern day technological communication.
At times it gets a bit too "preachy" and occasionally a bit heavy on the drama but it's perfect pacing and ensemble cast keep it from never getting boring.
It's infuriating, heartbreaking, morally confusing and when it all comes down to it asks the viewer to compassionately look at humanity from all different angles whether you want to or not.  
Definitely a film that wholeheartedly deserves more attention than it's woefully received.

4 anagrams out of 5

THE EAST [2013]

The East is an eco-terrorist thriller starring & co-written by Brit Marling and directed by Zal Batmanglij.
The story takes no time spinning itself into a cleverly woven espionage tale that is sure to intrigue, even if it does take itself way too seriously.  However you soon find as much as the film is driven by plot it seems to forget about the human element of these characters and therefore loses any sense of danger it might have had.
It's got some heavy strengths and weaknesses all of which make for a briskly paced thriller that doesn't quite hit the intensity it should of but never outwears it's welcome.

3 doc's named Doc out of 5

BATTLESHIP [2012]

Peter Berg's loose "adaptation" of the Hasbro boardgame, Battleship, marks the first time I've Nutted a film without finishing it first.

One hour into it I gave up on this stupid film.  In the same style as Michael Bay's Transformers films, Battleship is noisy & generic, horribly written, badly acted and poorly edited with loads of childish humour to boot.  

No.  Just no.

½ chicken burrito out of 5 

Melancholia (2011)

Dogme 95 director Lars Von Trier (whose last effort I saw was Antichrist) delivers his latest in cinematic experimentalism. Kirsten Dunst is troubled by a deep affliction on the night of her wedding which leads to the breakdown of her life. On the other side of things, you have her very supportive sister who comes to her aid throughout it all. The first hour or so is very slow and you have no idea where it's going and then...BOOM. Everything else that comes before it is rendered trivial. Like The Tree of Life, it makes use of impressive visuals and beautiful music. It's much better to go into this film knowing nothing and enjoy it for all it's worth.

5 brilliant uses of Wagner's Tristan und Isolde out of 5

13 [2010]

French director Géla Babluani's remake of his own 13 Tzameti, starring Sam Riley, Alexander Skarsgård, Michael Shannon, Jason Statham, Ray Winstone, Curtis Jackson, David Zayas and Mickey Rourke.

An underground dangerous game gets even more dangerous with each round....that's all you need to know.

Made up of subtly menacing performances, hypnotizing tension and unpredictability, 13 is sure to please on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

3 empty chambers out of 5