Ladies First (2026)

A misogynist hits his head and wakes up in a misandrist's world dominated by women, effectively inverting their positions. Once you get the joke that every single gender role is reversed, the plot doesn't get any deeper than that. What doesn't make any sense is that the men are all feminized and the women are endowed with masculine qualities, which contradicts the very message it's trying to put across, so I'm not sure what this film is trying to say. The endless moralizing on screen comes off condescending, exhausting and insufferable. And without any of the male empowerment roles that are afforded to women, the men here are all portrayed as either weak or evil, with no in-between. It might be considered problematic if the whole thing wasn't so fuckin' stupid. 

Remake of the French film, I Am Not an Easy Man, which I have no plans to see.

0 testicle bras out of 5

Jay Kelly (2025)

Clooney plays a successful actor (wink wink) going through an existential crisis, who takes an impromptu trip to Europe, while his entourage follows him wherever he goes. It's a very "inside baseball" look at the entertainment industry, occasionally meandering and self-indulgent, but performances are strong and it's easy to get caught up in the glitz. It didn't quite work its magic on me, but it's a solid effort and an examination of a life lived good enough.

3 slices of cheesecake out of 5

Paddington in Peru (2024)

After his aunt goes missing in Peru, Paddington must go back home to find her, as he gets mixed up with nuns and a riverboat captain on a quest to find El Dorado. If you're a fan of the others, it'll give you what you're looking for, but I didn't find myself as invested as the first two films and it hardly got an emotional response out of me. Most of the fun comes from Antonio Banderas as this entry's villainous lead. It's a cute adventure and the jungle scenery definitely pops on the big screen, but it's diminishing returns at this point.

2½ passport photos out of 5

Note: Emily Mortimer takes over the role of Mrs. Brown from Sally Hawkins, which probably accounts for why it feels so uneven compared to the others.

HARRY BROWN [2009]

Harry Brown is an intense, gritty British revenge film carried by Michael Caine in the title role.  Plot-wise, it's fairly predictable and offers no real surprises, however it's everything else in the film that captivates you from the very beginning.  The tension gets heavier and heavier, barely leaving the viewer any room to breathe, while Caine's subtly brilliant performance is complimented with an astonishing well-rounded out cast.  As dark and violent as the film gets, it packs an emotional punch that most revenge films seem to lack.  

4 Elephant & Castle's out of 5

SHUTTER ISLAND [2010]

Director Martin Scorsese takes Leonardo DiCaprio for a spooky ride in Shutter Island. Based on Gone Baby Gone author Dennis Lehane's novel, Scorsese gives it vibrant flair of noir-ish dreamlike creepiness.
DiCaprio is good but it's Sir Ben Kingsley and Mark Ruffalo who turn in subtly superb performances that may go unnoticed upon a first viewing. The morbid surreal atmosphere is so thick here you can cut with a rusted knife. The plot twists and turns with each corner taken but never gets too mind-boggling to detract from the flow of the story.
With each viewing it gets better and better as you notice the extreme attention to careful detail. It's not Scorsese's best film but it's a helluva a lot better than most cinema we're subjected to today.

4 Truth And Lies out of 5

Our Idiot Brother (2011)

I went in expecting "Dinner For Schmucks" and ended up with a piece of goddamn shit dribbling out of a half-open asshole. I wanted to slash my fucking wrists, this movie was so inane. It's all about a guy who is good natured and tries hard to do the right thing, but always ends up a fuck-up. Sounds fucking familiar to me. Paul Rudd is charming as his hippie character, the movie just isn't very good.

1.5 turds out of 5