Ghost in the Shell: Arise - Border 4: Ghost Stands Alone (2014)

In the last of the four-part Arise series an anonymous tip puts the Section 9 team on the trail of a hacker who has developed a unique cyber-brain infection program that enables memories to be overwritten and changed.
The story is complex and the action is plentiful, but Border 4 isn't as satisfying as the other three. The music didn't fit the visuals a lot of the time and the animation occasionally seemed rushed.
There was potential for dangerous hesitation and second-guessing of thought and actions (had their own memories been altered, and/or could they still trust the 'whispers' from their ghost?) but it went in a different direction - a direction that's still a very recognisable part of the Ghost in the Shell world, but a less dramatic one than I feel it could've been.

3 yellow bricks out of 5

Ash Wednesday (1973)

An ageing wife goes under the surgeon's knife in the hope that the cutting away of years from her face will also cut away the toll they've taken on her marriage. She's a woman disconnected from her husband and in many ways from herself. There’s nothing glamorous about it, which is the opposite of how many of us see Elizabeth Taylor.
The cold, uneasy beginnings in the clinic are unusual. Beyond that, things get more traditional visually. But, even so, it won’t satisfy anyone seeking a typical Hollywood movie. It’s another of those interesting roles she took during the 70s and for which she rarely gets the credit due.

2½ discarded parts out of 5

Far From Home (1989)

Normally resident in L.A., Joleen (Drew Barrymore) finds herself stranded with her father in a small town near the Nevada desert. It’s a shitty situation for a teen, but it becomes even worse when a few dead bodies turn up. The psycho killer at the trailer park scenario is played out alongside a young girl’s first steps into sexual maturity. She’s not shy but she’s inexperienced, experimenting with finding excitement in danger.
It lays on the menace overly-thick at times, but for a B-Movie it does a decent job at keeping the tension trundling along.
Special mention to Richard Masur, who made his character stand out.

2½ wristwatches out of 5

D-Tox (2002)

aka Eye See You

Sly plays an FBI agent who enters a remote detox clinic (not D-Tox, folks) exclusively for cops that resembles a desolate, gray-walled bunker level from an FPS video game. Which FPS? All of them. Once there, the film ceases to attempt building a potentially harrowing drama and descends into a piss-poor clone of Alien³ (1992 / 2003) and The Thing (1982), without an alien or a Thing. Instead, the threat is a serial killer content with living in a world dictated by horror movie logic.
The ‘retreat run by cops for cops’ screening process is questionable. To be fair, my own isn't much better. It wasn't until afterwards that I noticed the words ‘From the director of I Know What You Did Last Summer’ on the cover. If I’d seen that beforehand, I’d have chucked it in the trash sooner.

1½ snowy step processes out of 5

Fire in the Sky (1993)

Based on the book The Travis Walton Experience, a supposedly true account of alien abduction, the story surrounds the mysterious disappearance of Walton (D.B. Sweeney), the subsequent investigation and controversy. Whether you are a skeptic or a believer of the incident, the film's key players are portrayed rather convincingly by skilled character actors Robert Patrick, James Garner and Noble Willingham. Straying from the book, the horrific abduction and probing sequences are pure nightmare fuel. The movie is a forgotten gem dismissed by skeptics of the account. While the abduction claims are fascinating, if taken as entertainment it is a worthy horror film elevated by impressive acting.

3½ Grand Illusions out of 5

Tough and Deadly (1995)

Roddy Piper and Billy Blanks had teamed up previously for the film Back in Action (1993) and here they are again back in… er… more action, but not as the same characters. Both men wear knock-off Chuck Norris Action Jeans but they work different jobs. One is a Private Investigator and the other is an ass-kicking mystery man with amnesia.
It’s a buddy movie that ticks all the cliché boxes: training montage; bar fight; pool hall fight; scene that has guy falling out of a window and landing on the roof of a car. There’s also a lot of humour, but not too much that it tips over into parody. Somehow, and I make no excuses for feeling as such, it kept me smiling throughout because Roddy is a cheesy, classy guy.

2½ roundhouse kicks out of 5

The Delinquents (1989)

Kylie’s first film role is a significant departure from her TV soap days. It’s an Aussie drama set in 1957. She plays fifteen-year-old Lola, waiting for a Romeo to provide the kind of romance found in classic literature but without the tragedy. Brownie (Charlie Schlatter) is besotted with her, seeing in her the beauty he needs to counter the ugliness of life. Together the idealistic couple discover that tragedy isn't only found in books.
It’s a solid film that has an excellent first half, filled with period music and coming of age trappings. The second half isn't quite as good but was still engaging enough to keep me involved in their plight and reinforce my hatred of adults who "know what's best" for kids. How is anyone supposed to learn from mistakes if they aren't given free will to make them?

3 wild ones out of 5

Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008)

Yet another raunchy Apatow production, this time written by and starring Freaks and Geeks alumnus Jason Segel. Drawn from personal bad break-up experience, his story follows Peter (Segel) as he attempts to escape his split with the beautiful Sarah Marshall (Kristen Bell), only to end up at the same Hawaiian resort as her and the new boyfriend (Russell Brand). In his directorial debut, former Undeclared writer Nicholas Stoller doesn't stray too far from the Apatow formula with copious amounts of improvisation and maddeningly awkward moments. The editing starts off promising with cuts happening concisely at the climax of each scene, but it quickly degrades into lingering shots of drawn-out ad-libs. While completely entertaining with many quirky characters and imaginative set-ups, it never really produced a particularly unexpected or side-splitting laugh in me.

3 rock operas about Dracula out of 5

M (1931)

A child killer prowls the streets of Berlin. The public want him caught as soon as possible. The police want to be the ones to catch him. And the criminal underworld wants him gone by any means.
A large part of filmmaking is intuitive, but even so, any director worth their salt in the past 80+ years has been influenced by Lang’s expressive techniques. M was his first sound film and he used it like he used everything else: expertly. It enabled him to have things happen off-screen and to imply menace when otherwise there would appear to be none.
Peter Lorre is perfectly cast. If you've ever doubted his acting abilities, M will put an end to them. The last act is unforgettable stuff.

4½ lost balloons out of 5

Zatoichi and the Fugitives (1968)

The 18th film goes from quiet beginnings to a spectacular finale that takes place in close quarters and is one of the bloodiest of the series so far, but it doesn't neglect the slow burn and traditional moments in between.
Most of the villains, a group of yakuza who gather in a small town at the same time as Ichi arrives, are ruthless, senseless thugs led by a man who’s characterised by his biding of time and sense of caution. Their behaviour forces the blind swordsman to get his rage on to take them down. It’s such a fierce feeling that even the skies respond in kind.
It adopts a spaghetti western style in places, even musically, but the spaghettis were heavily influenced by chanbara, so it kind of works.
Takashi Shimura lends support as a kindly doctor.

4 shoulders of great men out of 5

Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)

Amid controversy comes Charles E. Sellier Jr.'s holiday horror film about a young man haunted by Christmas. The effective opening scenes detail the slaughter of his parents by a Santa-clad murderer and one very strict religious upbringing, leaving his mind fragile and warped. But the proverbial shit doesn't hit the fan until a cruel twist of fate forces him to don the fat man's suit. The well-constructed build up is what makes the ensuing rampage so satisfying. The look of the film is above-average and while the acting is at times cheesy and over-the-top, it fits right in with this grindhouse classic. But I will admit the killer's droning exclamations to "Punish!" get old pretty quick.

3½ mean left hooks out of 5

Back in Action (1993)

Roddy Piper and Billy Blanks fly flags for athletes/sportsmen turned actors. Roddy is a tough but sensitive cop that gets to wrestle once or twice. Billy has no such constraints and gets to kick and kick his way through almost the entire film while trying to rescue his asshole sister from her stupid self. I'd have let the thankless, selfish bitch go her own way but Billy's an ex-special forces brother, so it’s his duty to interfere. Even moustachioed twin thugs are no match for his fast-as-fuck footwork.
It’s a WYSIWYG action movie from start to finish imbued with just enough warmth to keep the brain from freezing over.
If you think the cover art is bad, google the alternatives. But at least the correct name is above the corresponding person each time.

2 dozen conveniently placed cardboard boxes out of 5

The Night of the Hunter (1955)

We're told at the outset that “blessed are the pure in heart…” That rules out Robert Mitchum’s character, although it doesn't stop him talking directly to God. They have something in common after all: God kills people, too.
The first half is superb stuff, filled with the kind of filmic techniques and cinematic quality that would make even Orson Welles grin and cough up for a round of drinks. The second half has some equally notable scenes but the story feels rushed in the last 15-20 minutes. An appreciation for what it dared to do from a technical point of view and an acceptance that it falls to pieces at the end are required to recognise its true worth.

4 warring fingers out of 5

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)

A soulless, ruinous version of The Hitchhiker's Guide that’s had all the deadpan wit filtered out of it in an effort to make it shorter and, I presume, appeal to a wider audience who don’t understand British humour. Ironically, the abridgement was for the best because the casting is so abominable that the sooner it ended the better. Many of the actors don’t seem to understand their roles at all. Even Stephen Fry, who’s given the impossible task of replacing the voice of Peter Jones, can’t save it from itself.

1½ generally bad moves out of 5

Shade (2003)

A tricksy drama in which misdirection and sleight of hand are both a part of the plot and a technique employed by the director to keep his audience guessing. Damian Nieman filled both creative roles and for some reason it’s his only film to date. He did well. The characters occasionally feel more written than real, but that's often par for the course in drama.
It follows a trio of card-cheating hustlers as they attempt to win big on a very exclusive poker game. As you’d expect, it doesn't go smoothly.
Being a fan of poker meant I very much enjoyed it. If the principal actors had tried harder to make the role their own it could've been even better.

3 dangerous games out of 5

Wedlock (1991)

aka Deadlock

At an undefined point ‘in the future’ Rutger Hauer’s luck goes unexpectedly sour. He’s placed in a penal colony where every inmate is fitted with an exploding, electronic collar that triggers if they wander outside of a painted border line. Cross the line = head goes boom.
What unfolds is predicable, light sci-fi stuff. I felt like I’d seen it before even though I hadn't. The prisoners are clichés and the twists and turns are totally transparent. But it’s not terrible and if you enjoy watching Rutger then it’s even enjoyable in places; he gets some caustic lines that raise a chuckle. It’s as if it set out to be average and achieved it.

2½ colourful names out of 5

DUMB & DUMBER TO [2014]

20 years later, Harry & Lloyd are back in Dumb & Dumber To, the sequel to the Farrelly Brothers' big screen debut.
Continuing the road trip/buddy flick blueprint, the boys head out in search of Harry's long lost daughter and inevitably hijinks ensue.  I'd be lying if I said this was any sort of quality film-making but, like the first, it never tries to be and lives up to it's name.  There's plenty of laughs to be had, insuring the Farrelly's don't lose their crown as the kings of gross-out comedy.   It feels a little outdated at times but if you're a huge fan of the original you'll find plenty to enjoy from this nostalgic trip through stupidity.

3 Pee Stains out of 5

ST. VINCENT [2014]

Just when I was ready to write off Melissa McCarthy as a one-hit wonder along comes writer/director Theodore Melfi's quiet little comedy St. Vincent.
It's the contrived story of a grumpy loser of an old man that finds a new reason to get up in the morning through the friendship of the new kid next door.  The best part about St. Vincent is McCarthy isn't the best part, the rest of the cast are just as good as she is, including Jaeden Lieberher, who never gets too cute or steps into "I'm a good child actor" territory.  Sure the story's been trampled over a million times before but the wonderfully played characters and sharp dialogue make this harmless heart-warming comedy well worth the visit.

3½ plates of "sushi" out of 5

Planes: Fire & Rescue (2014)

Planes (2013) was a surprisingly endearing and clever film with an array of appropriately cast characters. Fire & Rescue returns with the core players (Dane Cook, Brad Garrett, Teri Hatcher, Stacy Keach), using the same underdog formula from the first. This time Dusty Crophopper must adapt when his racing prowess is endangered. Cook is still relatable and down-to-earth as ever, his voice giving humor to mere perfunctory exposition. A change of scenery of course comes with new characters and while they all sufficiently embody their roles, they don't live up to the range of flamboyant and colorful personalities from the first. But the amount of adventure has not only increased but intensified with many beautiful and thrilling feats of endangerment.

3 pick up trucks out of 5

Hell of the Living Dead (1980)

aka Night of the Zombies

In the wake of any successful film there will always be imitators. Bruno Mattei's 3rd-rate Hell of the Living Dead copies many aspects of Romero's Dawn of the Dead (1978), from costume design, pivotal scenes and most notably, original music used unofficially from the band Goblin. The dull story follows a paramilitary squadron and two reporters as they traverse the jungle (and eventually the city) in search of the contaminate's source. The zombies' movements are uneven; some viciously attack at a moment's notice while others standby like frozen robots as characters taunt them. The dubbing is poor with clumsy dialogue added to fill holes in translation. Each character a paper thin caricature of the role they occupy. Sigh...I could go on, but this should be enough to keep any living creature from laying eyes on this turd.

½ very familiar blue jumpsuits out of 5

Paris Trout (1991)

PT is a period piece set in Georgia, 1949. Theoretically there’s one law for all, regardless of skin colour, but in reality that’s not quite true, because money talks. Dennis Hopper is Paris, a white store owner and moneylender to the local mixed community. Cross the line of non-payment and the lender becomes a shark with teeth sharpened on a stone of racism.
The overuse of diffused light got on my nerves, but there’s a real sense of history in the surroundings it fell on. It’s as if the cultural climate has permeated the furniture and the room in which it sits. But what really makes the film are the fine performances from everyone involved.

3½ poisoned bites out of 5

A LONG WAY DOWN [2014]

If I had to pick one thing that makes director Pascal Chaumeil's adaptation of Nick Hornby's so-so novel A Long Way Down worth seeing,  I would not hesitate with the answer: Imogen Poots.
Poots is the shining star in this offbeat drama about a group of suicidal folks who form a pact to help each other through the hard times.  The film has a helluva time finding what sort of tone it's going for, which results in a somewhat frustrating experience.  At times it's quite funny, charming, likeable and driven by interesting character moments but the tone is so off-shooting one can't help but be completely distracted by it.
It's a miss but still manage to be an enjoyable miss I have no desire to see again.

3 bad trips out of 5

OUIJA [2014]

Ouija doesn't have a lot going for it before it even gets out of the gate.
A horror film based on a Hasbro board game, produced by Michael Bay, directed by Stiles White (the guy who sloppily wrote Knowing and The Possession) and starring a bunch of young TV stars from Bates Motel, Teen Wolf and The Secret Life Of An American Teenager.
Still interested?  Then you have a great threshold of pain from flat-lining performances, laughable dialogue and general all around lameness.  

1 dip in the pool out of 5

HORRIBLE BOSSES 2 [2014]

Nick, Dale & Kurt are back for more crimes gone hilariously wrong in the sequel to 2011's smash hit, Horrible Bosses.
This time around, the hopeless trio hatch a kidnapping scheme that quickly spirals out of control when their victim wants in on the job.  What's interesting is to see how much the chemistry of three lead's chaotic banter seems to play more like co-star Charlie Day's TV show It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, which makes for a delightful surprise not seen in the first film.  Sure the jokes are rudely moronic, outrageously offensive and questionably tasteless but with the right timing they're perfect.  If you're a fan of the first then you're almost guaranteed to enjoy this one just as much if not more.

3 permanent markers out of 5

TUSK [2014]

Every now and then a film comes along and lingers with you for days, constantly bringing up that nagging question: "what the fuck?"
Kevin Smith's oddball horror Tusk is most definitely one of those films.
In what is destined to be a cult classic, the story follows an obnoxious podcaster who interviews a man that ends up surgically turning him into a human walrus.  It dives deep into the absurd but always manages to bring the characters to the surface for the stark realization that it's actually quite horrific as it is hilarious.  Michael Parks steals the show as the batshit crazy walrus lover, particularly when he's sharing a gut-wrenchingly funny scene with Johnny Depp that steers into David Lynch territory.
It's far from perfect but that's actually part of it's midnight movie appeal.

3 Clerks out of 5

Warlock III: The End of Innocence (1999)

Some days my enthusiasm is lower than a pop star’s standards, especially when it comes to crap like Warlock III. The lighting almost convinces otherwise. but mostly it’s a twenty-something, spooky house horror with the horror replaced by supernatural antics. The Dir. pulls some stupefied rabbits out of the shabby hat every now and again, but the script and acting are bad. I’ll say ‘silk purse’ and ‘sow’s ear’ and let you fill in the blanks.

1½ crap friends out of 5

THIS IS WHERE I LEAVE YOU [2014]

Director Shawn Levy tones things down from his usual fare for the quiet dysfunctional family drama, This Is Where I Leave You.
After the death of their father, four big city siblings are forced to return to their suburban home to live with their mother for a week which reveals many things about their messy past, present and futures.  It saunters through overly familiar territory but with it's dynamic cast (not a weak link in the group), realistically written potty-mouthed script and amusing moments galore it still manages to capture the heart by the end.  As great as the cast is, there's just so damned many characters, some of the more interesting ones are never fully explored and you're left yearning for just a bit more.  In a way it's a delightful wasted opportunity that just narrowly missed the mark from becoming what it wants to be.

3 Jewish atheists out of 5

ELF [2003]

I normally steer clear of Will Ferrell films but I have a big ol' soft spot for director Jon Favreau's refreshing Christmas comedy Elf.
Ferrell plays a hopelessly optimistic man, raised by Santa's elves, who finds himself searching for his roots in the cynical world of New York City.  It follows some pretty clichéd plot-points and you know exactly where it's headed within the first 5 minutes but due to Ferrell and the rest of the cast you can't help but find your heart warming up to it's simplicity.  As safe as it is for the kids, it thankfully supplies enough laughs for the whole family to enjoy, with a few faces gramps will recognize as well.

4 Cotten-Headed Ninny Muggins out of 5

WALLACE & GROMIT: THE CURSE OF THE WERE-RABIT [2005]

"Bunnies!  So many bunnies!" I thought to myself as I gleefully watched Wallace & Gromit's first feature length film, The Curse Of The Were-Rabbit.
Directed by creator Nick Park & animator Steve Box, the story follows our old pals as they hunt down a giant mutant rabbit that is ravaging the town's vegetable gardens.  While the previous cartoon shorts touched on the old sci-fi/horror b-movies only in their titles cards, this film finally goes all out and gets pretty hilariously weird without ever losing it's charm.  You can't help but love Peter Sallis' voicework as the oblivious but ever-caring Wallace while Gromit's facial expressions are just as good as they ever were.  It's not quite as good as the shorts are but still remains pretty damned funny and heart-warming.

3½ carrot gold bullets out of 5

BILL & TED'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE [1989]

Alex Winter & Keanu Reeves star as two time-travelling airheads in Stephen Herek's 80's teen comedy Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
Bill and Ted have to pass their history exam or else it's game over, so with the help of an Americanized TARDIS they travel through time to pick-up famous dead dudes throughout the ages.  There's no denying this is vintage '80's silliness but with the help of the two title character's lovable performances and some hilarious head-shaking lines & situations it manages to win you over within minutes.  Herek's eye is horrible as nearly all his shots are off-kilter, badly framed and unimaginative but that's not what we're here for.  They're harmless, positive role models that stand by their words no matter how bad things get: "be excellent to each other".

3 medieval dickweeds out of 5

Warlock: The Armageddon (1993)

Julian Sands returns as a warlock with a similar agenda as before, but he’s not the same warlock and it’s not a sequel. Why? Because then they’d either have to do some hasty ret-conning or go for the lame memory loss plot device and that wouldn't fool anyone. Instead, they throw some modern-day Druids and a pair of young lovers into the path of destruction and hope we don’t notice that the result is like a flaccid cheese stick compared to the previous film’s brightly coloured chalk sticks.

2 old rune stones out of 5

Warlock (1989)

I don’t know whether to label it as supernatural or just plain fantasy, but it sure is good fun. Julian Sands is well-cast as the titular Warlock hunting for a Satanic Bible so that he can fuck everybody’s shit up. Richard E. Grant is a kind of Van Helsing/Kyle Reese/Dr Who hybrid witch-hunter out to prevent those kind of shenanigans from happening by doing his own acceptable brand of witchcraft on the side. It's all very silly, but it's self-aware silliness that knows when to play for laughs and when not to.

3 times hither and thither out of 5

Kyon Ki... (2005)

It’s One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975) with an Indian twist, but instead of mad Jack we get Salman Khan who plays a man with an intense hatred of flies and a past that’s sent him a little bit insane.  Kareena Kapoor hovers around the ward until needed; she's a doctor who cares too much in a Sanatorium filled with a typical bunch of clichéd crazies.
I laughed pretty hard at some of the slapstick moments despite not being a fan of that kind of thing ordinarily, but the part of the story that should’ve ripped my heart out without any anaesthetic was underpowered.

2 shock treatments out of 5

Frankenstein's Army (2013)

This film suffers from an overactive imagination. Almost nothing happens in the opening 30 minutes as Russian soldiers on a reconnaissance mission find themselves in the clutches of re-animated super soldiers. The found footage aspect is far-fetched and almost pointless. Now imagination can be a wonderful thing, but when the cartoon-like creature designs upstage the flat story, there's a problem. You will fall in love with the undead army as each one are masterfully created killing machines. But they would have shined more had there been less of them. Karel Roden does a great job as the mad scientist Viktor but sadly his role is too little too late.

2 propeller heads out of 5

Underwater Love (2011)

Pinku films often push boundaries, not just of good taste but of style and substance, keeping the spirit of experimentation alive in an industry that's well-known for strangling it at birth. UL embodies that experimental notion by merging Pinku with the musical, telling the story of a woman who works in a fish factory and of a kappa that's in love with her.
The insanely catchy music is by German duo Stereo Total. Songs aren't as integral to the plot as I'd have liked, but it's worthy of praise for even existing as it does. The enthusiasm of the female lead, Sawa Masaki, as she bursts into spontaneous dancing is wonderfully uplifting to watch. It has a distinctly handmade quality that makes me like it even more.

3½ revivals out of 5

Haunt (2013)

Similar to such recent ghost stories as Insidious, Sinister and The Conjuring, the film "begins with a house and a tragedy". It centers around the quiet teen Evan Asher (Harrison Gilbertson), his family and a neighborhood girl named Sam (Liana Liberato). Scenes are filled with moody lighting, jump scares and plenty of great sound design. The effective cinematography and absorbing narrative are a surprise since this is only Mac Carter's second film. There is really nothing new here but I found myself attached to the endearing characters, especially Evan and Sam. Gilbertson and Liberato are true stand-outs. Some may find the ending abrupt and out of character with what audiences expect but it helps set itself apart.

3½ unusually understanding parents out of 5

Twisted Sister: Live at Wacken: The Reunion (2005)

Pero’s snare sound is a bit off at the beginning but his timing isn't, and as the show goes on everything gets progressively better. French and Ojeda are both on the mark. If you didn't know prior to watching how long Twisted Sister had been apart, you’d never guess from the performance alone. Mendoza pounds the bass like the animal he’s named for. But best of all, frontman Dee Snider hasn't lost any of his passion. It’s uncanny how much of his lyrics, penned decades ago, are fitting to a reunion occasion.
It’s not just music; it's intercut by each member separately discussing the breakup and eventual road to reformation. It’s interesting, but I’d prefer that kind of thing on a separate disc and have the gig uninterrupted.

4 destroyers out of 5

I, Frankenstein (2014)

In the same frame as such PG fantasy/horror films as Twilight or Red Riding Hood comes I, Frankenstein, yet another retelling of the classic story, this time placing the monster in the middle of a war between gargoyles and demons. The plot (and everything else for that matter) is infantile and shallow. Aaron Eckhart plays the creature, renamed Adam by the queen of the gargoyles. As a one-liner spouting, over-choreographed, philosophy-waxing clod he tracks down the one and only positive note in this production and  the root of the war, Demon Prince Nebarius (Bill Nighy). Nighy's cheeky composure spits in the face of the over-serious acting and inane dialogue. Filled to the brim with CG, the overdone action sequences are cartoonish and silly. This movie belongs in a crib.

1½ re-animated rodents out of 5

Lawnmower Man 2: Beyond Cyberspace (1996)

I sincerely hope that in an alternate reality Matt Frewer is getting the breaks he deserves and has an agent to keep him in the roles he's perfect for, because in our reality his unique aura is often wasted by being cast in crap like LM 2, in which he plays an unhusked Jobe. It's best not to dwell on that odd turn of events, or indeed anything else, because it's a shambolic, unnecessary sequel to a film that really didn't need one. Beyond Cyberspace? Beyond Ridiculous would've been more apt.

1 obsolete system out of 5

Tammy (2014)

The husband & wife duo of Ben Falcone and Melissa McCarthy bring us the story of one Tammy, a deeply immature and uncultured woman. At the crossroads of her life, she makes a hard left turn into debauchery and degradation. Much like McCarthy's previous comedies, the humor is at times crass and the acting forced. Many scenes deserve trimming for the lingering improvisation. The characters are well fleshed out and quite specific. McCarthy is reminiscent of Chris Farley at his best in her role of the overzealous yet lovable Tammy. A surprisingly strong supporting cast (Susan Sarandon, Kathy Bates, Gary Cole, Allison Janney) slightly elevate the simple plot, but only enough for a handful of truly comedic moments.

2½ viking burials out of 5

The Lawnmower Man (1992)

Kick a dog enough times and it’ll eventually turn and bite you in the ass and you’ll deserve it. Jobe is like that dog. Born with learning difficulties, he’s a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures. Science can change what nature gave him. Commerce can shaft him in every other way.
TLM is sci-fi that’s very much a product of its time, despite stealing a large portion of its premise from an older Daniel Keyes story. As such, even though the CGI is dated it’s not a problem within the context. What's more problematic is how the sympathy cultivated in the first half isn't maintained well enough in the second half, so by the end it’s difficult to care if anyone survives the threat. It's flawed but I enjoy it regardless.

2½ cold calls out of 5

In Fear (2013)

An appropriate title as the film deals more in creepy atmosphere suspended by beautiful cinematography than actual substance. Recently acquainted Tom and Lucy make a romantic detour on their trip to meet friends at a festival. Through a series of wrong turns and strange occurrences they find themselves lost. In this minimalist affair only three characters are ever introduced. The third, Max (Allen Leech) adds the final dose of suspense as he treads the line of disturbed victim/psychotic thrill-seeker. Much of the film saunters about adrift but even in the third act it lost my attention at points. While lacking originality, it does stand above many in its genre with its effectively dreadful ambiance.

2½ spilled pints out of 5

BUtterfield 8 (1960)

BUtterfield [sic] strives to be a serious and affecting adult drama but the romance side of the story is weak and sluggish. Liz looks bored and oppressed, only really springing to life in scenes wherein she's paired with Eddie Fisher. Laurence Harvey looks the part but doesn't excite as a leading man. If you harnessed the electricity between them it wouldn't even power an LED. The saving grace is the sarcastic comedy that surfaces when there's more than one woman onscreen; at those times, as each tries to gain the upper hand, the dialogue sharpens and puts the rest to shame.

2½ elegantly spiteful bitches out of 5

The House That Dripped Blood (1971)

Despite the gruesome title, this anthology horror film surrounding a succession of doomed tenants in the titular abode does not contain one drop of blood. But the lack of gore is not a hindrance as the renowned cast (Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Denholm Elliott, Ingrid Pitt) serve up a film full of atmosphere, intrigue and dismay. Psycho's Robert Bloch penned the script and his devious nature is found in each segment's twist. I found the score by Michael Dress to be a real standout component. Not just a background compliment to each scene, but a guide leading each character towards their ill-fates. While some may find the title misleading and the visuals dated, this classic contains enough of the macabre to keep any horror aficionado happy.

3½ head is a dish best served cold out of 5

Kate Bush: The Whole Story (1987)

The Whole Story is a collection of thirteen promo videos from the first five Kate Bush albums. You can view the kooky dancing as a thing of choreographed beauty or as the movements of a madwoman let loose with a video camera. I’m firmly in the former camp. Like her previous release, The Single File (1983), TWS is currently unavailable on dvd or blu, so either seek out a second-hand VHS or Japanese Laserdisc copy, or as before go to Wiki, get the song list, then go to youtube and make a playlist. The last I checked, the Official Kate Bush channel had them all in good quality.

5 Irish fairy tales out of 5

Wilder (2000)

aka Slow Burn

Pam Grier plays a single mom who’s also a Chicago detective, firm but loving towards her kids, tough and uncompromising on the job. When a case involving a dead woman in a suitcase ruins her day she takes aspects from many of her previous roles and rolls them together into something less than the sum of its parts while trying to solve it.
The script attempts a balance of seriousness and light heartened comedy that doesn't quite succeed, but at least it gives the film some kind of identity. The editor tries to spice it up further but the choice of musical accompaniment undoes most of the hard work.

2 overcompensations out of 5

XXY (2007)

Small coastal towns are arguably an overused setting for the kind of drama that deals with family secrets, but in this instance it’s very apt. The vast differences in the mating habits of sea creatures provide a contrast for their land-based counterpart, in a place where we’re defined from a young age by our gender. What then of Alex, age fifteen, hermaphrodite?
XXY is an uncompromising study of a youth on the fringes of society. It’s a coming of age story for Alex (Inés Efron), but it’s also the story of a father who wants the best for his child while living with a problem that he doesn't understand. But maybe it’s only a problem if you turn it into one?

3½ migrations out of 5

City of God (2002)

A powerful Brazilian drama directed by Fernando Meirelles and Kátia Lund that's set in a poor, crime-ridden suburb of Rio de Janeiro. It’s told primarily as flashback, with style and substance on equal footing, illuminated with the kind of natural light that money can’t buy.
The city is a place wherein good friends and a gun can help you get by. A plan can get you further but could just as easily get you killed. Rocket has the latter, but even that isn't a guaranteed ticket out of the slum.
The V/O is from one character but it tells the story of many, each of the small cogs that help the larger cogs turn. The feeling that the City of God is as much a victim as the individuals that inhabit it is ever present.

5 lucky shots out of 5

Jukkalan (2011)

aka This Girl Is Bad-Ass

A Thai action/comedy starring the very agile JeeJa Yanin as a love-struck bicycle courier who carries packages for the local mobsters. Almost everyone else is love-struck too, which gives rise to hijinks that are hit and miss. Some of the insults were creative. At least they were to a westerner like me. They may well be commonplace in Thailand.
The stunts, often either on bikes or involving bikes, are as frenetic as you’d expect considering the pedigree of talent involved.

2½ face failures out of 5

Stray Cat Rock: Delinquent Girl Boss (1970)

A group of street-savvy women, really just chicks with knives and razor blades, fight for a purpose when a sukeban rides into town and provides guidance. It's interesting seeing the traditional roles of the sexes reversed, and exploring how rules are applied and disregarded in the contrasting arenas of the street and the boxing ring, but ultimately DGB is 80+ minutes of style over substance played out to a soundtrack of funky jazz and psychedelic rock.
If Dir. Hasebe had further indulged his willingness to explore a film frame’s role in the telling of a story then things might've been better.

2½ dizzying traffic violations out of 5