Honey Don't! (2025)

The second in Ethan Coen's "loose" lesbian B-movie trilogy, full of murder and sex and lots of senseless violence that leads nowhere. Margaret Qualley does her best Natasha Lyonne impression as private eye Honey O'Donahue, while Aubrey Plaza plays her prospective love interest and Chris Evans portrays a polyamorous cult leader. Aside from some skin, I didn't find it very titillating. I recall feeling a similar way about Drive-Away Dolls, although at least that one had a fun MacGuffin element. It's pretty empty at the end of the day, and the more I mull on it, the less I enjoyed it. The whole thing is a mess and I'm being generous with my rating because I like the way it was shot, but that's about it.

2 fingerings out of 5

WONDER WOMAN [2017]

Monster director Patty Jenkins pulls off the near impossible and makes Wonder Woman the first DCEU film not to be a complete disaster.
Set during World War I, Diana, Princess of the Amazonians, leaves the comfort of her island paradise home to battle the evil---blah-blah-blah.
Ain't nothing new but it's done with so much enthusiasm one can't help but enjoy themselves.  Gal Gadot is an absolute delight as the title character, which shouldn't surprise anyone who's unfortunately sat through Batman v Superman.  There's plenty of flaws to be found if you give it enough thought but that sort of thinking isn't going to get you anywhere fun.  If anything, this one sits aside Sam Raimi's Spider-Man and Richard Donner's Superman as comic book films that are nothing but pure spectacular fun that kicks ass.

3½ babies made of clay out of 5

HELL OR HIGH WATER [2016]

Starred Up director David Mackenzie cleverly strips down the tragically violent folk ballad in his Western heist lo-fi thriller Hell or High Water.
Dissecting the rich from the poor and the fatuity of American gun control, the tale follows two born loser brothers that hatch up a clever plan to pay back the thieving bank they are heavily in debt to.
It questions tormented destiny, what is your life worth sacrificing for, the love of family and can you ever escape what you're born into.  Heavy handed themes are afoot but rather than beating the viewer over the head with them, it subtly places them in random actions, surprising flashes of humor and bits of "meaningless" dialogue as we grow closer to the mesmerizing characters.  Aided by some kick-ass music from Townes Van Zandt, Gillian Welch, Scott H. Biram, Nick Cave & Warren Ellis and more, it helps making for a stylized thoughtful romp that is both quiet and intense.

4 enemies of everyone out of 5

STAR TREK BEYOND [2016]

Director Justin Lin gives Captain Kirk & Friends a fast & furious makeover for the third installment of the Kelvin timeline, Star Trek Beyond.
This time around we follow the restless Enterprise crew into uncharted space where they meet a Big Bad who's bent on destroying the federation.
It's a pretty straight forward story that feels more like an old episode of TOS, especially by dropping the heavy cynicism of the first two films and diving deeper into the search for hope in humanity.  More a character piece than story driven film, we get plenty of great moments with the cast that all share an easily watchable on-screen chemistry.  There's some unforgivable face-palmy moments but Trek's always had it's fair share of bits that easily out-dates itself best taken with a grain of salt.
It's not going to win over any folks already hissing at the series but for those already invested in this series than it's as pleasurable as Insurrection or The Search for Spock.  A welcome stand alone film treading water in a world of sequels that require knowledge of every film in the franchise.

3 big green hands out of 5

STRETCH [2014]

Director Joe Carnahan's Stretch channels the same sort of comedic bat-shit crazy adrenaline he gave 2006's crime-caper mess Smokin' Aces.
Patrick Wilson plays a down-in-the-dumps limo driver who races across a Southland Tales-esque LA to run errands for a crazed billionaire (hilariously played by Chris Pine) that enjoys snorting coke, hitting himself, snorting coke and burning things.   On the outside it seems like it's pure chaos being loud & weird for no reason but underneath it's a clever study of fate and confidence in one's own masculinity.  Sure it's heavily flawed in many areas but it races from beginning to end without ever taking a breath you probably won't even notice until hours later.

3 mustaches grown in Hell out of 5

HORRIBLE BOSSES 2 [2014]

Nick, Dale & Kurt are back for more crimes gone hilariously wrong in the sequel to 2011's smash hit, Horrible Bosses.
This time around, the hopeless trio hatch a kidnapping scheme that quickly spirals out of control when their victim wants in on the job.  What's interesting is to see how much the chemistry of three lead's chaotic banter seems to play more like co-star Charlie Day's TV show It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, which makes for a delightful surprise not seen in the first film.  Sure the jokes are rudely moronic, outrageously offensive and questionably tasteless but with the right timing they're perfect.  If you're a fan of the first then you're almost guaranteed to enjoy this one just as much if not more.

3 permanent markers out of 5

STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS [2013]

A little bigger, darker and bolder than director J.J. Abrams & his Fringe team's first film in the franchise, Star Trek Into Darkness continues the "more balls than brains" version of Trek.
It stirs the excitement with adventure and intrigue, while taking us to brand new worlds that seem more in place in the Star Wars universe than Rodenberry's vision.  Nevertheless, with a simply deliciously cold and menacing performance from Benedict Cumberbatch and Chris Pine & Karl Urban stealing lens-flared scenes left right and center, the film is nothing more than good summer fun to butt heads with Iron Man 3.

3½ models of Zefram Cochran's ship out of 5

RISE OF THE GUARDIANS [2012]

Based on William Joyce's series of children's books, The Guardians Of Childhood & The Man On The Moon short film, the CGI animated adventure, Rise Of The Guardians collects all the childhood imaginary heroes in one film to create an Avengers sort of extravaganza.

With the help of producer Guillermo Del Toro, the film raises the bar in imagination and beautifully designed characters & backgrounds, all told with an even enough pace to never get too boring.  Unfortunately the characters are pretty plain and the dialogue constantly flatlines into insignificance which shamefully puts Jude Law's deliciously villainous performance to waste.

3 beliefs out of 5

UNSTOPPABLE [2010]

I'll admit, I wasn't expecting much at all going into the late Tony Scott's final film, Unstoppable.  

I was a fool.  What I got was a highly entertaining, tightly wound, heart-stopping action film that's difficult not to get wrapped up into.  The premise and characters are pretty thin but we're here for the action and that's where the film excels relentlessly.  Only Scott can make a crowd of onlookers in industrial smalltown USA look just as exciting as a high speed car chase in New York City. 

Popcorn fun at some of it's finest.

3½ breakfast cereal storms out of 5

SMOKIN' ACES [2006]

Writer/director Joe Carnahan attempts to go for a hip, violent and witty crime film in Smokin' Aces but just narrowly misses the mark.

It's a bit of a mess, lacks any sort of interesting character developments and never fully realizes it's own potential but can be pretty damned entertaining at times.  It's got a huge cast which keeps you guessing who's going to bite the bullet next and makes for a pretty intense finale but it just simply tries to hard to be "cool and shocking". 

2½ white trash karate kid boners out of 5

STAR TREK [2009]

When the mastermind behind TV's LOST, Alias & Fringe, J.J. Abrams was announced as the director of the 2009 reboot of the Star Trek franchise it created quite a stir with Trek fans and Abrams fans alike.
Apart from some unforgivable flaws and changes to the universe, Abrams take on the Trek is nothing short of an entertaining ride. Highlighted with a solid story, action, humor and wonderful spot on performances (particularly from Chris Pine, Zackary Quinto and Karl Urban) the new Trek is more balls than brains.
In a time with ridiculously dark comic book movies and brainless comedy after brainless comedy, Abrams optimism and humor in Star Trek is a refreshing breath of fresh air.

4 Wil Wheaton's voice is everywhere out of 5

THE CAPTAINS [2011]

This entertaining documentary (written and directed by Captain Kirk himself) follows Billy Shatner around the world as he intimately interviews all the different actors who sat in the captain's seat of each installment of the Star Trek franchise.
It's hilarious at times, while still managing to be engaging, touching and insightful as we learn a little more of the pressures and delights of portraying a Trek captain. It might be a little bit of a vanity project for Shatner's ego but it doesn't matter...he is The Shat and that's that.
The Captains may not be for everyone but a must-see for Trek fans.

3½ insane Sisko's out of 5