SAUSAGE PARTY [2016]

Directors Greg Tiernan (Thomas & Friends) and Conrad Vernon (Madagascar) turn to the darkside for the highly offensive, yet atrociously funny animated Sausage Party, written by Seth Rogen, Evan Goldberg & Jonah Hill.
It's the Fourth of July and all the food products at Shopwell's Grocery Store are excited to get whisked away to a better place...or so they think.  

Try to imagine Toy Story, then replace the toys with food and then humor yourself with the notion of Mr. Potato Head or especially Jessie The Yodeling Cowgirl getting ripped apart and devoured by their owners.  With that in mind, prepare to feel your ears curl up with the language that would make the South Park guys uncomfortable.  Be ready to laugh till your in pain because it's pretty fucking funny, with some cleverly placed themes neatly woven into all the un-PC crudeness.  In short, it's the perfect example of stupid brilliance.  

4 "Great" Beyonds out of 5

TRUE STORY [2015]

Rupert Goold makes his directorial debut by casting funny guys James Franco & Jonah Hill in the dreary mystery drama, True Story.
Based upon disgraced reporter Mike Finkel's memoir of the same name, the film follows him as he meets with the incarcerated Christian Longo, who stole Finkel's identity after being accused of murdering his own wife and children.  Being unfamiliar with the real case really helps with building up the dramatic mystery of Longo's story, so I'm not sure how invested one would get if they already know how it all turns out.  Franco does a wonderful job at using his calm demeanor for a cold creepiness rather than stoner-comedies and Hill once again proves he's not just the funny fat guy but can actually carry a dramatic leading role.  Felicity Jones is a real gem and while sorely underused she still manages to make every scene she is in count.  It's not as bad as audiences seem to think it is but there's so much more this beautifully shot film could have expanded on to build it into a far more captivating story.

3 lies out of 5

THE INTERVIEW [2014]

Vancouver boys Seth Rogen & Evan Goldberg co-direct what would probably be the world's most controversial film of 2014.
A pair of bumbling American tabloid personalities go to North Korea to talk with Kim Jong-un, when they are secretly pulled aside by the CIA to assassinate him instead in the outrageously crass action/comedy The Interview.  It's dim-witted, overly crude, surprisingly violent and offensive, all while managing to toss in a great deal of laughs into the mix at the expense of both the U.S. and North Korea's funny little critter.  In reality had the nation not made such a fuss about the mediocre film, it probably would have disappeared into obscurity within the year...but instead it was hilariously turned into a piece of cinematic history.

2½ Unexpected Journey's out of 5

GOOD PEOPLE [2014]

Danish director Henrik Ruben Genz made some wonderful films in his native language so what the hell happened with Good People?
A young couple, heavily in debt, find a sack full of money that's being hunted down by both the police and criminals that want it back.  Obviously the story resorts to "greed makes people do the darndest things" and leaves a pile of bodies in it's path.  Apart from the boring retread story (which could work with a bit more wit about it) the fast pacing of the script hurts the slow-buring reveal of the direction.  It simply conflicts so heavily that we're pummelled with incoherencies and plotholes galore.  Genz's eye for rainy day Killing-esque noir and decaying buildings are as beautiful as always but with so much lost in translation and studio interference everything gets lost in this 90-minute mess.

2 inevitable nail guns out of 5

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS [2008]

David Gordon Green steps further into the mainstream with his first, and so far only good comedy, the buddy action flick, Pineapple Express.
Inspired by the idea of taking Brad Pitt's stoner character from True Romance and seeing what he does when he gets his ass off the couch is pretty much what this film is.   Like most of these Rogen, Franco, McBride & co films, it's the ridiculous yet strangely realistic bickering dialogue that makes it funny and laughably stupid at the same time.  For some bizarre reason the film does get outrageously violent near the end, leaving a somewhat baffled feeling that's torn between laughter and disturbed.  There's shades of DGG's style of film-making here but beyond that it's hardly recognizable as one of his films, which would be all but gone with his next two shit-fests.

3 birthday cakes for a dead cat out of 5

HOMEFRONT [2013]

Director Gary Fleder's Homefront calls back to the moody action/thrillers of the '80's.
Written by Sylvester Stallone several years ago, it was originally intended as a Rambo. Star Jason Statham is given the chance to channel a softer side as he plays a family man here, while James Franco goes against his usual role as a violent drug lord.
Plotwise the film does absolutely nothing original in its genre and really is only saved by its main cast who all look like they're having a great time.  In the end, I'd call it a great renter for fans of The Stath.

3 explosive lights out of 5

Lovelace (2013)

A biopic of infamous knob-gobbler Linda Lovelace. It's bookended by before and after but mostly covers her time spent in the porn industry. It captures the look of the era but lacks any real spark elsewhere.
The main focus of the story is in showing the manipulative nature of the relationship between the two leads, Linda and her husband Chuck. They're the only characters with any real depth, and even then it’s the shallow end of the pool. It’s a shame Robert Patrick got so little screen time; his understated performance was one of the highlights. Amanda Seyfried carried the film the rest of the time and looked beautiful throughout. Peter Sarsgaard oozed sleazy and looked like documentary filmmaker Morgan Spurlock’s evil twin.

2½ freckles out of 5

THE ICEMAN [2013]

There were three films I've been eagerly anticipating in 2013: Only God Forgives, Mud and director Ariel Vromen's biographical drama The Iceman.
Michael Shannon is brilliantly frightening as the notorious contract killer Richard Kuklinski but it's Winona Ryder who steals every scene as the frightened wife who knows nothing of his secret life.  Vromen washes the screen over with as many dark colors as he possibly can creating a cold yet calculated vision.  The tension never lets up making for a very unsettling watch that is both emotional and mesmerizing.  It doesn't quite reach the climax it should based on the intense build-up but that's okay based on the brilliant lead performances.

4 corpsicles out of 5

127 HOURS [2010]

Danny Boyle directs James Franco in the biographical thriller 127 Hours, based on canyoneer Aron Ralston's struggle to free his hand being stuck by a boulder.
Reminiscent of the way Darren Aronofsky portrayed an incredibly flawed Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler, the film gets even more intimate and personal in some truly thoughtful and disturbing ways.  Franco does a fantastic job as a reckless near sociopath that is twisted into a reflective thankful soul.  With the story taking place 90% in a hole in the ground, it's a challenge to hold your attention for the entirety of the film but Boyle & Franco do a damn fine job attempting it.

3½ ghosts of Scooby-Doo out of 5

SPRING BREAKERS [2013]

Writer/director Harmony Korine makes films that blurs the lines between exploitive trash and fascinating social commentary.
Spring Breakers tells a tale of the Facebook generation and the glamorization of alcohol & drugs, over-sexed youth, violence and material possessions.  Here it manages to propose a potentially interesting subject to dissect but then forgets about it and just milks it's allure to stupid youth for all it's worth.  Korine has a great eye for colors and scenery, as James Franco makes a wonderfully frightening psychotic but the rest leaves absolutely nothing to think about.  The biggest mistake is dropping the only sympathetic character so early in the story thereby leaving us with nothing but abhorrently repulsive characters.

2 silly bints out of 5

THIS IS THE END [2013]

There's something to admire about a bunch of buddies sitting around indulging in debauchery, being ridiculously crude and well, just shooting the shit while the rest of the world is turning to shit.
This Is The End captures that perfectly, courtesy of writer/directors Seth Rogen & Evan Goldberg.
It features the entire Frat Pack in both leading roles and cameos playing exaggerated versions of themselves as they try to survive the apocalypse while hiding out in James Franco's house.  I loved the insanely stupid idea brought to life with a witty script, high energy, multiple in-jokes and one of the most pig-snorting, popcorn spewing funniest cinematic experiences I've had in a long time.

4 shitty weird Canadian lives out of 5

OZ THE GREAT AND POWERFUL [2013]

Sam Raimi directs a film about an everyday Joe who unexpectedly gets whisked away into a strange world where he's thought to be more than what he really is.  It's called Army Of Dar---...wait a sec.  It's called Oz the Great and Powerful.

It serves as a prequel to L. Frank Baum's Oz novels, allowing the writers to do whatever the hell they want as long as it leads up to the events in The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz.  Filled with astonishingly beautiful visuals, great performances from all the witches and a wonderous score from Danny Elfman, you'd think it'd be enough.  Sadly, it falls short of the magic of the originals, drags it down with overly dull dialogue and a somewhat lacklustre performance from James Franco as the title character.  See it on the big screen while you can because on a television set nearly everything worth seeing will be lost.  

2½ yellowbrick potholes out of 5

Spider-Man 3 (2007)

The promise of the Venom symbiote entering the Spidey world got fans in a fap-tizzy prior to the release of film number three, myself included, but it's a huge disappointment. It appears from nowhere and has no motivation. Elsewhere some new characters are similarly devoid of back-story to leave more time for lengthy action scenes that'll please the action junkie or your twelve-year-old niece. Peter has some excellent scenes in a film that almost got the square button half-way through.

2 pills for Jameson out of 5

Spider-Man 2.1 (2004)

The first of the Spidey sequels strives to be more mature and less comic-booky in approach. Peter is dealing with his emotions in the aftermath of the first film. His movements while in costume are confident. His life out of costume is complicated. It's a more engaging story. The baddie is menacing while retaining a certain amount of relatable, human flaws. Even ninety percent of the action sequences are good times. And best of all there's less needy-whore Mary Jane. Director Raimi has fun with a hospital scene that'll have Evil Dead fans smiling and clapping with one hand.

4 sticky wrists out of 5

Spider-Man (2002)

High school science nerd by day, costumed superhero without pockets by night, Peter Parker has the worst of both worlds. The balance of action and characterisation could be better, but it's still damn good fun.
Casting is the biggest problem. Tobey Maguire is good as Peter, and J. K. Simmons is the perfect personification of J. Jonah Jameson, but the rest of the cast are either simmering just above average or downright irritating. If viewed as an essential set-up for the next film, it's easier to forgive its flaws.

3 reasons I'd let that bitch fall out of 5

Love & Distrust (2010)

Five shorts by one director, each exploring different sides of love and distrust. Well, that was the claim but it's hard to tell while watching, as they've almost nothing in common. Each one is different visually, and while some are just plain awful, the first one especially, some are heartfelt and almost entertaining. I kind of liked the Aussie one. I wouldn't want to watch it twice, but it passed the time until I was ready to go to sleep.

1½ moves to the give-away pile out of 5

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES [2011]

James Franco, John Lithgow, Brian Cox, Freida Pinto and Andy Serkis make up the cast to this stunning prequel to the original "Apes" stories from the '60's & '70's.

While it does fall into summer blockbuster action sequences on the occasion (which are still entertaining to watch unfold here), Apes gets itself back on track with interesting situations and relationships that are usually so poorly written in most popcorn flicks.

The film challenges your morales, diminishes your feel good mood that most summer films seem to like to throw at you and gets in quite a few good scares which was a pleasant surprise. While not as good as the original, it is the best thing since.

3 ½ Hidden Charlton Heston's out of 5

YOUR HIGHNESS [2011]

Horribly received box office disaster not quite as bad as everybody said it was.

It’s not really good either.

A few good chuckles in this tribute to ‘80’s fantasy movies struggled to keep my attention from start to finish.

Danny McBride is one of lucky few who can punch Natalie Portman square in the face and still get a laugh.

1½ Perverted Wizards out of 5