Oppenheimer (2023)

The most overrated movie of 2023. I love Christopher Nolan as much as the next film nerd, but he excels at making epic, original sci-fi films. I'm not quite as thrilled with his heady, awards-baiting historical dramas. This is essentially a 3-hour "talkie" picture about the Manhattan Project, and its literal fallout and legal ramifications. Does it really need to be that long to tell this story? Feels like a lot of pretentious showboating to me. The performances are all great and worthy of the acclaim they received, it's just that the whole thing feels a lot more self-important than it actually is. It does a fine job at telling its story, but isn't half as memorable or noteworthy as everyone else pretends it to be.

Won the "Best Picture" Oscar for 2023, but if the Academy had any balls, it would have gone to Poor Things.

3 Destroyer of Worlds out of 5

SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING [2017]

Clown director Jon Watts is curiously given the big order of bringing Spidey fully into the MCU with the John Hughes inspired Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Wasting no time with an origin story, the film dives right into the action with a band of criminals use the alien wreckage from The Avengers' New York battle to become a threat that might be too big for Spidey to handle on his own.
By ignoring the Uncle Ben story there's little tragedy to flesh out the character of Peter Parker and instead it opts to focus more on his struggles a "normal" teenager.  Apart from this major flaw the film is purely entertaining popcorn escapism in fine form with one of the MCU's best villains to date.

3½ Cappy America Public Service Announcements out of 5

CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR [2016]

The MCU kicks off Phase 3 with The Russo Brothers' Captain America: Civil War, which is basically the third (and best) Avengers movie yet.
Heavily inspired by Mark Millar's mini-series, the final part of the Cappy America/Bucky Barnes trilogy sees The Avengers' comradery turn sour when the United Nations wants complete control of the team of superheroes.
Kudos to the Russos for managing to keep the film a wild romp of a superhero smackdown but never sacrificing thoughtful subtext or a healthy helping of interesting character arcs.  It's also impressive at how well they manage to juggle such a large ensemble and never once leaving us feel as if we didn't get enough of one character and not the other.  A perfect example of how you can have your costumed characters duke it out something fierce, without getting ridiculously dark, while still keeping it smart and exciting.

4 Bluth stair-cars out of 5

AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON [2015]

Director Joss Whedon returns for his final stint in the Marvel Cinematic Universe with the second full-fledged Avengers film, Age Of Ultron.
Basically it's Earth's Mightiest Heroes, still feeling the repercussions of what their solo films put them through, team up to save the world from an humanity destroying machine known as Ultron.  The concept is simple enough for first time viewers to still enjoy the film without any prior knowledge, yet, like the MCU films & TV series before it, it features just enough back-story to excite fans who know the pieces for the Infinity Gauntlet and Civil War are all falling into place.  It doesn't quite have the same impact of "hey that Whedon guy did a great job" as the first one did but it still manages to pretty damned good fun.  Whedon's at his strongest when he's featuring his ensemble team working (or fighting) together in both dialogue heavy scenes or full all-over-the-map action sequences.  It's front-to-back a modern Hollywood spectacle but it proves Transformers is not how you do popcorn films.

3 drunken excelsiors out of 5

CHEF [2014]

Actor/director Jon Favreau steps away from the big budget SFX spectacles for awhile to put together a friendly little comedy called Chef.
Favreau plays a acclaimed chef who steps down from the bigtime to work in a much smaller food-truck, mirroring the director's step down from huge studio fiascos and into a quiet indie film.  It seems to have a pretty good idea what it's like dread the food critic's review and how juggling any sort of a life outside of the kitchen is next to impossible and that's part of the allure.  It isn't breaking any new ground or constantly trying to develop itself but is lucky to have some sharp dialogue, well-timed humor and enough harmless charm to make the whole family feel good (that's if Granny is hip to the number of F-bombs that are dropped).
In short, it's simply comfort food on film.  

3 shitty bosses out of 5

KISS KISS BANG BANG [2005]

Writer/director Shane Black loosely adapts a Brett Halliday Michael Shayne mystery novel and teams up Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer for the comedic crime film Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.
Like his Lethal Weapon films and The Monster Squad, Black cleverly inserts humorously witty dialogue into a fast-paced, straight-faced genre narrative.  This time around he takes the hard-boiled crime genre and gives it a flashy modern day Los Angeles spin.  Kilmer & RDJ have wonderful chemistry playing off each other while Michelle Monaghan holds up her own in between the bantering duo.  In a day of overly serious or just plain boring thrillers and crime dramas this film is a breath of fresh air.

3½ faggot guns out of 5

IRON MAN 3 [2013]

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang director Shane Black reunites with Robert Downey, Jr. on the third instalment of the ridiculously popular Iron Man franchise.
A little darker than the previous films, IM3 still delivers on the loud, vibrantly colored action sequences and enthusiastic performances from all parties involved.  The main attraction is the humorous chemistry & witty banter between RDJ and Don Cheadle, which I never tired of, unlike the climax, which was a lot of fun but eventually felt over-done and cliche.  Sure there's plenty of annoyances sprinkled throughout the film (particularly the introduction of an annoying kid) but it has just enough well-paced adrenaline and biting dialogue to rise above the half-baked previous film.

3 "bedtime stories" out of 5

ZODIAC [2007]

Director David Fincher tones down the abrasive shocks of his usual crime thrillers and opts for a more quietly thoughtful mood in 2007's unsolved crime-drama Zodiac.

Based on the story of the San Franciso serial killer known only as "Zodiac" in the '60's & 70's, the film fascinates with an age so close to ours yet the technology and ways of approaching such a case is vastly different today.  

With it's long scenes of heavy dialogue, precise attention to detail, flat yet strangely gorgeous photography (particularly the dizzying establishing shots) and slow-burning offering of the puzzle pieces, the film will most likely scare away Fincher fans of Se7en and Fight Club who will be expecting their fanboy needs met with violence, a loud soundtrack and cynical dialogue all of which is thankfully absent.  

4 animal crackers out of 5

A Scanner Darkly (2006)

The less you know about A Scanner Darkly in advance the better. What I can say is that it's based on a Phillip K. Dick novel, which means it explores themes including, but not limited to, paranoia, schizophrenia and the shifting nature of reality. It uses sci-fi ideas but it isn't sci-fi. Dick fans and people that like to give their brain some exercise should enjoy it.
The film was shot as normal and then digitally painted by hand in a painstaking process that took 18 months. If the resultant visual style puts you off watching, then you're not the target audience anyhow and you can go on with life confident that you've not wasted your time, nor that of the filmmakers.

3½ objective points of view out of 5

Iron Man 2 (2010)

While the ultimate goal is to separate you from your money, this sequel has two other reasons to exist. Firstly, it has a standalone plot, which has too much Paltrow and too much Rockwell, both of whom bring nothing to the table. Conversely, Mickey Rourke says very little and is both more appealing and more interesting than either of the other two.

The second reason Iron Man 2 exists is to further advance The Avengers, which is again designed to separate you from even more of your money.
It's ironic that the part which should feel like an intrusion, and is in reality an unfinished story, is more entertaining than the main part of the film, which descends into an obligatory explosion-heavy finale.
Once again, Robert Downey Jr proves to be the best cast Superhero in the entire Marvel universe.

3 very silly suitcases out of 5

Iron Man (2008)

An Iron Man origin story that sadly lacks a good villain, a factor that could've been easily compensated for by elevating the conflict between Tony and his limitations, or between his conscience and his past, but unfortunately neither of those things are given enough attention. Most of the time it really doesn't matter because Robert Downey Jr is simply amazing as the arrogant, billionaire playboy with the silver tongue and well-groomed facial hair. He makes the film more than the sum of its parts. Without him, it would be just another superhero film.

4 Stark raving awesomes out of 5

Natural Born Killers (1994)

Oliver Stone makes political films; NBK is different in approach only. It explores the controlling nature of the media through a violent journey filled with themes of incest, sexual abuse, murder and corruption. It’s a film-lovers film, full of quick cuts, emotive lighting, and utilising eighteen different types of film stock to achieve a canvas of chaotic satire that lets up for just a moment - that moment becomes the pivot upon which the film revolves. It helped make Woody Harrelson the man he is today.

4 snake tongues and shotguns out of 5

DUE DATE [2010]

Robert Downey Jr. and Zack Galifiankis star as two obnoxious unlikable characters in the roadtrip comedy Due Date.

While it supplies some great laughs, they are unfortunately few and far between.  As much as I hated the characters, the chemistry between the two stars made it bearable till the end.  A real shame.  It could have been so much more, given everyone involved in the film.

2½ Men out of 5

SHERLOCK HOLMES: A GAME OF SHADOWS [2011]

Guy Ritchie reunites Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law in Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows for more eccentric fun.

Jared Harris and Stephen Fry make delightful additions to the cast while Noomi Rapace is sadly underused.  It's not as clever as the first and resorts to silly unnecessary CSI-esque slo-mo a bit too often but still keeps up the frantic and entertaining pace.  It might be a slight misfire, however if they maintain this quality I'd still be up for a third helping.

3 little horsey rides out of 5

SHERLOCK HOLMES [2009]

Director Guy Ritchie set out to give Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes character the Batman Begins makeover with Robert Downey Jr. channeling Jack Sparrow as the title character.

What could have been a silly mess turns out to be thoroughly entertaining.  Right off the bat it's made apparent this isn't the Jeremy Bratt pip-pip Holmes, by inserting choreographed fights scenes and slo-mo CGI.  Unfortunately, Mark Strong and Rachel McAdams are painfully boring compared to the bromantic chemistry between Downey and Jude Law's Dr. Watson. 

Bad points aside, it can't be ignored that this is just good fun.

3½ ravens of death out of 5

THE AVENGERS [2012]

Joss Whedon's much anticipated comic book spectacle The Avengers (the sixth installment in the MCU series) meets all expectations and more.  The perfect blend of humor, cheesy comic book moments, humanity, character juggling and jaw-dropping action is to die for.  Summer blockbusters haven't been this much fun since Jurassic Park or Men In Black.  Whedon and Mark Ruffalo bring something to the Bruce Banner/Hulk character that's never been done properly before.  

Bravo.  More please.

4 puny gods out of 5

Love & Distrust (2010)

Five shorts by one director, each exploring different sides of love and distrust. Well, that was the claim but it's hard to tell while watching, as they've almost nothing in common. Each one is different visually, and while some are just plain awful, the first one especially, some are heartfelt and almost entertaining. I kind of liked the Aussie one. I wouldn't want to watch it twice, but it passed the time until I was ready to go to sleep.

1½ moves to the give-away pile out of 5

Weird Science (1985)

“So…what would you little maniacs like to do first?”

It's every teenage boy’s fantasy come true: creating a perfect, sexy woman for yourself, who only wants you and who will do your every bidding. Hell, it’s still my fantasy. A staple of ‘80s cinema, with PG-13 logic and reasoning, and one can’t help but wish it went further sometimes. There’s not much "science" to be found here, but it's a comedy, so I rate it on the basis of ingenuity and laughs…and this one’s a keeper.

“Why do you have to be such a wanker?”

“Because I get off on it.”

4 shit monsters out of 5