The Toxic Avenger (2023)

What fresh hell is this? 14 years ago, I mentioned the long-awaited reboot of The Toxic Avenger. It finally arrives. And it's fucking awful. They turned Toxie from a "hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength" to a 4 foot freak, but that's the least of my problems with it. They ruined everything about it; the gore, the comedy, the romance, sex/nudity, music and violence. Even though it's "unrated," it feels tame and the CGI kills lack that raw, brutal DIY feeling of the original. The humor doesn't hit right, and worst yet, it lacks any sense of danger or controversy. The characters aren't relatable and the villain is way too one-dimensional. It's missing all the charm and fun of the original series. I can't tell you how utterly disappointed I am by the lot of it. 

This isn't for OG Troma fans, and if you think it is, you're just a poser.

1 acid dissolved chain out of 5

Oppenheimer (2023)

The most overrated movie of 2023. I love Christopher Nolan as much as the next film nerd, but he excels at making epic, original sci-fi films. I'm not quite as thrilled with his heady, awards-baiting historical dramas. This is essentially a 3-hour "talkie" picture about the Manhattan Project, and its literal fallout and legal ramifications. Does it really need to be that long to tell this story? Feels like a lot of pretentious showboating to me. The performances are all great and worthy of the acclaim they received, it's just that the whole thing feels a lot more self-important than it actually is. It does a fine job at telling its story, but isn't half as memorable or noteworthy as everyone else pretends it to be.

Won the "Best Picture" Oscar for 2023, but if the Academy had any balls, it would have gone to Poor Things.

3 Destroyer of Worlds out of 5

I DON'T FEEL AT HOME IN THIS WORLD ANYMORE [2017]

Indie-actor Macon Blair makes his directorial debut with the neo-noir comedy I Don't Feel at Home in this World Anymore.
Frustrated and depressed by the useless apathetic world around her, a young woman is robbed and finds the only way to make things right is to take matters into her own hands.  AKA Falling Down for the Trump era.
With it's bursts of uber-violence, twisted humor and a cast of low-life criminals, it's obvious Blair is heavily influenced by the directorial/screenwriting works of his regular collaborator Jeremy Saulnier.  Things tend to get pretty outrageous and unbelievable but it's Melanie Lynskey's nuanced performance that manages to keep everything grounded in a warped sense of reality.  The script could have used a bit more tightening up but thankfully it never ceases to shock and amuse.

3 fucking spoilers out of 5

GREEN ROOM [2015]

Director Jeremy Saulnier, once again, forces nerve-shredding audiences to the edge of their seat with the intensely violent thriller Green Room.
Desperate for money, a touring punk band take their chances playing a deepwoods Oregon show to a club of white supremacists leading them into a night of extreme bloodshed.
Like he did with Blue Ruin, Saulnier crafts a style of violence that is so swift, brutal and realistic it never needs to linger on it to leave an unsettling lasting effect.  Each performance is beautifully understated but it's Patrick Stewart's big bad that shines, as he never sacrifices his civility for clichéd boorishness.  Instead he uses his courteous mannerisms to evoke more fear into the already uneasy viewer.  It's just as delightfully nasty and blackly humorous as his previous works but Saulnier doesn't quite keep the tension quite as tightly wound throughout as he did before.  Still, this is a great thriller that leaves a lasting impression with nervous disturbed laughter.

3½ red laces out of 5

MURDER PARTY [2007]

Director Jeremy Saulnier's debut Murder Party is an over-the-top comedy that is just a taste of the disturbingly violent films he would thrust upon us.
An awkward loner finds a Halloween party invitation on the sidewalk and decides to attend the mysterious soiree, foolishly unaware of the horrors that lie before him.
The movie has a difficult time smoothly bouncing back & forth between comedy and violence but still manages to make both effective.  It offers enough surprises and shocks to please the twisted movie-goer searching for something well off the beaten path.  It might take it's time picking up steam but once it does it turns into a wildly funny bloodbath that has a surprising amount of tension.

3 "art" projects out of 5

BLUE RUIN [2013]

Writer/director Jeremy Saulnier leads us down the darkness of his Southern Gothic revenge flick Blue Ruin with great film-making precision.
 Skinny little nobody Dwight Evans sets out to avenge his murdered parents only to find improvising isn't the best way to go as he gets in way over his head.  Saulnier channels the Coen Brothers and Cormac McCarthy, with an uneasy slow-burning tension that occasionally erupts in spurts of violence that feels uncomfortably closer to reality than most films in it's genre.  Dwight is a cold and distant figure that we wouldn't know if not for the people that nervously surround him and that's where we find what little comfort the film offers.  It could be a pure bloodbath but the film knows precisely when to let the violence in and when to let the pressure cook, proving  itself to be a lot more clever than one might suspect.  A finely shot, hauntingly effective thriller that hypnotizes with it's well-paced reveals and off-beat humor.  

4 Pontiacs out of 5