NO FUN CITY [2010]

No Fun City is a fascinating documentary following the end of the second wave of the independent punk rock and hip-hop scene in Vancouver.  

It's frustrating to see how little the city cares about or are willing to support any artist willing to think outside the box.  All the clubs have been shut down, leaving venues open for more mainstream acts or emo and R&B acts. Featuring interviews from members of D.O.A., Skinny Puppy, The Rascalz, The Japandroids and the wonderful Wendy13 (the ex-owner of The Cobalt, Vancouver's now defunct version of CBGB's), No Fun City will anger you and hopefully inspire you to do more about it yourself.

4 Fuck You, Vancouver's out of 5

THE ARTIST [2011]

Like Martin Scorsese's beautiful Hugo, French director Michel Hazanavicius' The Artist is a passionate ode to the golden age of cinema.

Telling the story, through picture only, of an aging silent film star who finds himself obsolete with the introduction of talkie films, it explores the themes of the inability to adapt and too much pride.

It strips back all the bells and whistles leaving us with a wonderful story, instantly likable characters, lavish photography and charming music courtesy of Ludovic Bource.
...and isn't that what good film-making is all about?

4 adorable dogs out of 5

Hitch (2005)

Will Smith has achieved the impossible. He's gone from being an engaging and charismatic leading man in his early career to churning out watery shit that even Eddie Murphy would be embarrassed to appear in. I hear Murphy is preparing to pass over his crown of shit to the young Prince.

0 Fuck right off out of 5

Cat People (1942)

Older horror films are great, but I often feel like the stories had to be watered down in order for them to make it to screen. Cat People is different. The story is subtly told, but there's no holding back. There's subtext everywhere, and anything that we don't see feels like it's withheld for a reason.

It's amazing to watch this movie and think about just how old it is. Not everything about it is great - many of its characters are bland, and some of the acting is cringeworthy - but it's atmospheric and ahead of its time. This was Hitchcock before Hitchcock, and I can't even imagine how many directors were influenced by that terrific swimming pool seed. This got a remake in the 80s, but unlike many other horror movies of its time, it never needed to be redone.

4 women who look like cats out of 5.

Layer Cake (2004)

A successful drug dealer who likes to keep the lowest of profiles gets an order from his boss to do a dumbass task, one that will put him squarely on the radar of the kinds of people he hates. It's a British crime drama with too much unnecessary plot that leads to a pointless ending, but the journey to get there is fun. Michael Gambon is fantastic and it's the only time I've ever enjoyed watching Daniel Craig act.

3 make hay while the sun shines out of 5

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

A series of prequels telling one character’s story prior to the first X-Men film was an idea that had potential; it’s certainly more logical than a reboot. I’d have liked a Magneto one, but it would need to be bleak and touch on some heavy political matters that would scare producers.
A Wolverine origin would’ve been my next choice. What we got doesn’t live up to expectations. It’s a mess of badly choreographed action and hurried pacing that presents little opportunity to become emotionally attached to anyone. Hugh Jackman gives it his best, but he can’t save it from itself. It has one emotional scene, but it’s not enough to recommend the film.

1 Ryan Reynolds is a dick out of 5

I'M STILL HERE [2010]

I'm Still Here documents the elaborate joke creepy actor Joaquin Phoenix executed to expose the entertainment industry, the hang-around leeches & the press as nothing more than backstabbing cunts. Filmed by fellow creepy actor Casey Affleck, the film starts out viciously funny as Phoenix announces his retirement from acting to pursue a hip-hop career but as it progresses it becomes quite clear the actor involved himself into the role so much that the joke ultimately backfires on him.    

Whether or not he'll ever recover from this huge career choice misfire has yet to be seen.  

3 literal shits in the face out of 5

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Brett Ratner turned this chapter in Jean Grey's evolution into a mostly soulless summer action movie. The first hour is good, but it shits the bed in the second half. If you accept that prior to viewing, then it's possible to enjoy parts of it, but if you're expecting the semi-sophisticated aesthetic of the two previous films then you're going to be butt-hurt. On the plus side, Magneto's Brotherhood begins to feel more like an organisation and less like a gathering of friends over tea and cake. It's a good thing that the main series ended here.

2½ characters with little to do out of 5

BLOODIED BUT UNBOWED [2010]

Bloodied But Unbowed follows the first wave of the Vancouver Punk rock scene in the late '70's & early '80's.

This wonderful documentary features interviews with Canadian punk legends D.O.A. & The Subhumans as well as globally known artists such as Henry Rollins & Jello Biafra.  It goes deep into the birth of the scene, how well the gay, Christian & art community helped it flourish, it's national success and how it ultimately self-destructed into violence and drugs.  It's a raw, passionate and very informative lesson in Vancouver music history.  

4 fuck yous out of 5

BEAUTIFUL BOY [2010]

Beautiful Boy tells the tragic story of a mother & father suffering the aftermath of their son's mass shooting at his college before taking his own life.

Maria Bello and Michael Sheen are magnificent as the grieving parents, as are the rest of the cast but for some reason the film never really allows the viewer to get emotionally connected.  I'm not entirely sure but I think it has to do with Shawn Ku's direction.  Having only done two fluffy musical comedies I don't think he knew how to approach such a dramatically powerful project.  

It's sets itself up for something big and spits out something that simply fizzles out.

2½ vandalized graveplates out of 5

THE PIRATE TAPES [2011]

The Pirate Tapes is a frightening documentary that follows a young Canadian/Somali filmmaker who infiltrates a group of Somali pirates and it's poverty-stricken underworld.  I haven't a clue what this kid was thinking when this "brilliant" idea struck him.  He finds himself surrounded by machine guns of all sorts and sizes, some pretty scary looking villages and extreme trouble with two other pirate clans and the local police. Nothing is ever really resolved with this film but we are given a better look at what these modern day pirates are all about...and that's close enough for me.

3 city center landfills out of 5

BLADE RUNNER [1982]

Film noir usually consists of the cynical detective, the femme fatale, a vast array of deadly thugs, corrupt policemen, endless rain and in Philip K. Dick's Blade Runner, android owls.

On & off director Ridley Scott's brilliant adaptation of the gritty sci-fi noir novel is essential viewing for space nerds and film buffs alike.  Having been tinkered with several times over the past 30 years, Blade Runner is made nearly perfect in every way in The Final Cut.  Sure the characters are still a bit boring but the story, setting, atmosphere, sets and photography make up for it with flying colors.

It's a breathtaking and believable film that still holds up strongly till this day.

5 Eyes Of Providence of 5

X-Men 2 (2003)

Bryan Singer's last sitting in the X-Men director's chair follows on from, and expands upon, what he started in the first film. It's more action packed this time, has more characters to accommodate and requires a longer running time to do so. There's some unexpected pairing up of characters, some internal conflicts and some subtle motivations that may go unnoticed with your first viewing. The more I watch it the more I get from it. It's focussed on Wolverine a lot, but Patrick Stewart once more steals the show. Did Mystique just flip...!

3½ Bamfs and Snickts out of 5

SOUL SURFER [2011]

I was prepared for melodramatic sap in Soul Surfer but not the Christian morals shoved down my throat.

Based on the true story of surfer Bethany Hamilton who lost an arm in a shark attack and her struggle to go back to what she loved.  The film depicts a world where all the pretty blond girls are good & the dark haired ones are bad and if you have faith in God everything will be all right. What a crock of horseshit.

Apart from AnnaSophia Robb's inspiring performance and composer Marco Beltrami's ability to tone down the melodrama with his uniquely simplistic score, this film should be avoided if you're not a braindead zombie.

2 one-armed push-ups out of 5

DUE DATE [2010]

Robert Downey Jr. and Zack Galifiankis star as two obnoxious unlikable characters in the roadtrip comedy Due Date.

While it supplies some great laughs, they are unfortunately few and far between.  As much as I hated the characters, the chemistry between the two stars made it bearable till the end.  A real shame.  It could have been so much more, given everyone involved in the film.

2½ Men out of 5