Those Who Do Not . . .

In September 2020 Blogger forced a complete dashboard overhaul upon all users of its service. As a desktop PC user, the push toward a phone + tablet style interface has greatly soured the joy I'd typically feel at creating posts.

In response, I'm lessening my Blogger activities. Presently, that means no more In a Nutshell for the foreseeable future. (I'm shutting the door, but keeping a light on.) I'm extremely proud of how it's evolved over the years and have really enjoyed the time spent on it, initially with companions and the final few years as a solo reviewer. Often, it helped me achieve peace.

Before I confront the Nutshell-shaped void that will no doubt be felt in my life, I want to sincerely thank everyone who made me laugh and/or took the time to read my ramblings. It was just a blog, but it was more than that, too.

- CLOSE -

The Iron Giant (1999)

Based on Ted Hughes' 1968 novel The Iron Man: A Children's Story in Five Nights, it tells of a friendship between a spirited nine-year-old youth named Hogarth and a fifty-foot iron giant from space who eats metal, which is an activity that doesn't go unnoticed by the townspeople. When a busybody federal agent begins snooping around, believing the visitor to be a foreign threat, he causes more problems than he had intended to solve.

The 1957 setting has a wonderfully rich aesthetic, populated with well-fleshed out secondary characters, purposeful cold-war caricatures that personify governmental paranoia and coercion, and many loving nods to 'atomic age' science-fiction movies. Crucially, beneath its era-specific strengths is an inspiring emotional layer that's uplifting and unquestionably timeless.

5 duck + cover sirens out of 5

The Water Babies (1978)

A loose adaptation of Charles Kingsley's 1863 book of the same name, the film is notable for its blending of live action and animation, which likely doesn't seem as special now as it did back in the late 70s. Set in 1850 in England, it's the story of twelve-year-old Tom (Tommy Pender), apprentice to a cruel chimney sweep (James Mason). When Tom is blamed for something he didn't do, he escapes to an animated fantasy world, which gives the film its name.
The animation side of things is colourful and the primary moral lesson is straightforward and easily understood, but there's some broad cultural stereotyping that may seem crude by today's standards. Billie Whitelaw plays multiple roles, which doesn't make a lot of sense, but she brings a welcome level of real-world wonder to what at times is a pretty grim way of life.

3 transformations out of 5

The Aardman Collection

I didn't know it at the time, but as a regular viewer of children's art shows Take Hart (1977–83) and its successor Hartbeat (1984–93) I got my introduction to Aardman Studios through Morph, the show's loveable claymation character (far right in pic above). But it's as creators of the Wallace and Gromit stop-motion animations that the studio is best known - at least in the UK, further afield it may be as makers of Chicken Run (2000). Regardless of which of their creations you think of first, there's no denying that the Bristol based studio is deserving of a Collection post all of their own. I bet even Chas would agree.

Wallace and Gromit:
01. A Grand Day Out (1989)
02. The Wrong Trousers (1993)
03. A Close Shave (1995)
04. Cracking Contraptions (2002) TV Series on Nut Box
04. The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)
05. A Matter of Loaf and Death (2008)
06. World of Invention (2010)  TV Series on Nut Box

Other Works:
A Grand Night In: The Story of Aardman (2015)
Shaun the Sheep Movie (2015)

Asylum (1972)

In the best of Amicus' anthology films, Robert Powell plays a psychiatrist seeking employment at the Lovecraftian sounding Dunsmoor Asylum. To prove his suitability he must identify a specific inmate by interviewing each one briefly. However, the stories they tell, written by Robert Bloch (adapted from his own works), may themselves be the product of an insane mind. There's a murderous husband who's final insult is his undoing, a struggling tailor who's asked by Peter Cushing to make a suit with "special" material, a deadly alter ego, and a man with some odd ideas about dolls. The frame narrative is better integrated than usual, and the music more memorable, making great use of Mussorgsky's superb Night on Bald Mountain.

3½ occupational hazards out of 5

The Minion (1998)

Maintenance work on NY's subway leads to the discovery of an ancient chamber with an unusual resident, around whose neck is a strange artefact, the discovery of which plunges struggling archaeologist Karen (Françoise Robertson) into the centre of a long-running conflict between good and evil.
The title refers to a body-hopping, growling spirit in service to the Antichrist, who wants to bring on the Apocalypse. Between the minion and his goal stands Dolph, with faith in his heart and a spiked glove on his killing hand.
There's a commendable amount of fictional lore in the story, and the attempt at establishing a common thread between two very different belief systems was interesting, if unsuccessful, but the production, acting and action are weak. It has two different musical scores; my version was the shit US one.

1½ warrior monks out of 5

A Study in Terror (1965)

A story that puts the fictional Sherlock Holmes (John Neville) into a real life historical setting, namely Whitechapel, on the trail of Jack the Ripper.
It must be a difficult thing to make Holmes seem ineffability clever without also being arrogant or smug; Neville manages it some of the time, but his sleuth definitely crosses over into the less likable sphere from time to time.
With the exception of Carry On queen Barbara Windsor, who gets colourful attire and some actual characterisation, the prostitutes are blank tools. The city fares better, with dingy alleyways and rain-soaked cobbles. The sound of night-walking heels on the latter is suitably atmospheric.
The murders are violent for the era, even when they aren't shown directly; the most unsettling of which is surely the lengthy POV scene that puts us into the killer's world while simultaneously masking the perpetrator's identity.

2½ maxims out of 5

Criminal Justice (1990)

A slow-burning TV drama about a father with priors (Forest Whitaker) accused of assaulting a Brooklyn prostitute (Rosie Perez) who was someplace she ought not to have been, doing something that would land her behind bars for the night. The viewer doesn't see the woman's assailant, so it comes down to her world against his, and only one of them puts any value in truth.
The story would hold its own ordinarily, but the passion and believability of both Whitaker and Perez take it to another level. It shows both sides of the argument, as the months roll by. But more than that it examines the justice system itself. Presented as something that isn't just broken, it never functioned to begin with, as anything other than a self-serving entity that prioritises saving time and money over the thing for which it was named.

3½ burdens of proof out of 5

Over the Top (1987)

Stallone plays Lincoln Hawk, a father who's been estranged from his ten-year-old son (David Mendenhall) for the boy's entire life. The kid is a US military school brat, bordering on insufferable when we first meet him. At the behest of the youth's mother, Hawk spends time with the kid, hoping to get to know him during a lengthy truck ride across states. Trouble comes from the boy's overbearing grandfather, who wants trucker Hawk out of the picture.
It's a pretty clichéd story of an absent father who has to fight to knock down the walls of his child's preconceived notions and feelings of abandonment, and the bonding can be disappointingly mawkish at times, but it has the charm of a 1980's VHS rental, and I have a fondness for that kind of thing, When in Vegas it tries to be the Rocky of arm wrestling, and it does a half-decent job at it. I was inwardly (but assuredly) cheering for pops during the finale.

3 shoulder pillows out of 5

A Prayer for the Dying (1987)

Based on a 1973 Jack Higgins novel of the same name that I haven't read, it stars Mickey Rourke as an IRA member named Martin Fallon. When a plan to murder members of the British Army goes wrong, the bomber flees from the North of Ireland to London. He claims to have had enough of killing, but accepts a job to kill once more in order to fully escape. There's probably meant to be a tragic irony in the situation, but asking an audience to sympathise with the likes of Fallon with little justification is asking too much.
Alan Bates does well as a cultured funeral director who's also a gangster, but Bob Hoskins is miscast as a catholic priest who has a past of his own. The film strives for a remorseful moodiness, but achieves mostly unevenness.

2½ changed tunes out of 5

Dr. Terror's House of Horrors (1965)

The first horror anthology from Amicus Productions stars two of the genre's greatest actors, Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. The former is the titular Doctor, but the House isn't literal - the setting is a night-time train carriage into which he steps. He tells the fortunes of the other passengers, each of whom experience a glimpse into their individual futures.
In no particular order, there's creatures of the night, voodoo happenings, and killer vines, among others, with an occasional just deserts situation, and the frame narrative having a twist of its own. I can't say without going into spoiler territory why I thought the frame ending was detrimental to the whole, but maybe I expected too much from the studio's first attempt. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the various settings and the performances of the lauded cast.

2½ conveyance predictions out of 5

Warning from Space (1956)

We're told that mysterious objects from space have landed in a number of major cities around the globe, but the story takes place in Tokyo. As a lifelong fan of 1950s sci-fi, I've seen some odd creatures onscreen, but the ones in Japan on this occasion are pretty darn unusual. When their first attempt to infiltrate the population is unsuccessful, they try another way, which is good for the budget. And for a while it seems as if the story is laying groundwork for a commentary on atomic power that’s distinct from most films of the era, but it really doesn’t stay on that track. In the end, it’s a sober tale of aliens on Earth and scientists battling impending doom that has a quick-fix ending.

2½ luminous bodies out of 5

Black Mirror: Bandersnatch (2018)

A  feature-length episode of Charlie Brooker's Black Mirror that's the film equivalent of a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure book. Limited choices appear onscreen; to advance the narrative you must pick one only. It starts simple, such as what music the character will listen to, but it gets increasingly dark as the story goes on. At least, my experience did. I opted for choices that I'd take, not what I thought was best for the character (Fionn Whitehead). Sadly, it led me to what in video game parlance would be the 'bad ending'.
Usually when deciding what score to end my thoughts with it's on a like-for-like scale, but I've not seen a film like Bandersnatch before, which poses a problem. And the story as I experienced it might not be the same as the one that you get, which makes scoring an even more meaningless concept.

␦␦ pathways out of ⑃

Mothra (1961)

The début film for Toho's other famous kaijū begins with a typhoon in the Pacific. It forces a ship's crew to seek refuge on Infant Island, a place believed to be radioactive. A return expedition there uncovers something wondrous, which the less moral members of humanity typically disrupt, enslave and exploit. Their selfish actions bring an island god incarnate to their door.
Not inherently evil — in fact, with intentions that are objectively good — Mothra nevertheless brings death and destruction to much of Tokyo, with a force that's interestingly similar to the one that wrecked the sailors' ship.
Action scenes are typical of kaijū films of the era, with some quality miniature buildings, but the exotic flora and Polynesian-esque culture stand out.

3 mysteries of life out of 5

Dream Cruise (2007)

A feature-length version of a heavily trimmed episode from Mick Garris' Masters of Horror series (Season Two). Directed by Norio Tsuruta, it's based on a short story by Kôji Suzuki, who's best known in filmic circles as the author of the works that Hideo Nakata's Dark Water (2002) and Ring (1998) films were based on. Dream Cruise, as you've probably guessed, also involves water.
A lowly lawyer (Daniel Gillies) with a long-standing guilt complex and a fear of the wet stuff agrees to take a boat trip with a "valuable" client in order to keep him happy. The boat breaks down and the atmosphere, which wasn't there to begin with, never gets to a level where it can be felt. The weak framing, stupid plotting, overplayed sound effects, shit acting, lack of music, and reliance on Japanese horror clichés make it an utter washout.

1½ cabin crawls out of 5

Stone Cold (1991)

Classic 90s macho action with a salon-ready leading man (Brian Bosworth), who looks like he'd bleed adrenaline (and a hint of steroid) if he was to cut himself with a razor at home. He's Joe Huff, an Alabama Cop on suspension for aggressive behaviour, enlisted by the FBI to go undercover in a deadly biker gang that's headed by a laughing Lance Henriksen. But first the gang must accept Joe (aka Stone) as one of their own, so he has to get extra moody.
It's the kind of movie in which shotguns blow people through windows and stunt guys fall impressively from great heights. It uses action clichés to its advantage, somehow, allowing Stone to "turn it on" when needed.

3 bumpy rides out of 5

Broken Arrow (1950)

Celebrated more these days for what it did contemporaneously than for its story; i.e. being one of the first post-war Westerns to not portray its Indian people as one-note Hollywood savages, Dir. Delmer Daves' film stars Jimmy Stewart as a man who seeks to negotiate peace between the "white" US military and the Apache Indians, who were waging war upon each other. Both sides are characterised as being noble and honest or wicked and prideful.
I'm no expert on 1950s values, but I do wonder if 42-year-old Jim romancing a 16-year-old Debra Paget wouldn't have raised at least a few eyebrows back in the day? And what of the respected Christian General who condones murder as a punishment? Were they viewed as reflective of the 1870s in a similar manner to how we view the film's built-in 1950s social commentary today?

3½ long-distance signals out of 5

Matango (1963)

One of the more peculiar creature films in Dir. Ishirō Honda's filmography is a story told by a Professor (Akira Kubo) who knows what he says will make him sound crazy but is compelled to share it, nevertheless. It begins jovial, with seven people on a private yacht, but shifts to something more grim when a storm blows the revellers onto an unnamed Japanese island. Occasional flashbacks to before they set out on their sea journey add comparative value, but the subtextual layer is where the dark tone finds its anchor. Depending perhaps on your level of cognisance, the creatures may seem ridiculous or oddly unsettling, but my guess is for many it'll be somewhere in-between.

2½ broken mirrors out of 5

Pray for Rain (2017)

Jane Seymour looms on the cover, but the main focus is on her character's daughter, Emma (Annabelle Stephenson), who looks like she could really be closely related. The basic premise is standard TV drama: a young woman who moved to the big city to escape her farming community life returns to the parental home for a funeral and gets involved in local matters. In this instance the girl is a fashion reporter who suspects foul play. As she investigates one thing, she uncovers truths about the deceased, a person she thought she knew. On paper it's all too familiar, but the direction (Alex Ranarivelo) and score (Jamie Christopherson) help it be one that feels like it grew beyond its original agenda; in that respect, it exceeded expectations.

3 little fish out of 5

Time Trap (2017)

A modest budget sci-fi about a small group of people who venture into a Texan cave to find someone who ventured into the same cave and didn't come out; coincidently, the person they're seeking was there to find folks who also entered but didn't come out. It doesn't look good for all concerned - doubly so when you factor in the differing time dimensions and that the intelligence level of all but one of the team is barely above a typical horror movie bint.
The concept is classic genre stuff. Initially it seems as if the filmmakers are content to stretch it to breaking point, but if you're able to overlook the weak atmosphere, the am-dram acting, and some dire dialogue that relies too much on exposition, then there's a few turns in the latter half that may surprise. As a fan of shoestring sci-fi, I enjoyed the ideas more than the people.

3 lengths of rope out of 5

Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (2003)

I feel the throttle ought to have remained close to where it was at for the first movie, because upping the action to almost super-hero levels of ability makes the sequel feel like unintentional self-parody. If the scene that opens the farce (before the title appears) makes you cringe, then prepare for the worst, because things get even more moronic later on. The homages to other media feel forced, and the underlying worry of separation and outside commitments, which does actually play into the main plot, is as contrived as Justin Theroux's Irish accent. A pinch of decent subtext could've saved the story, but nothing other than residency on the cutting room floor could've stopped the action scenes from shitting over the potential for more light-hearted fun.

1½ whip tricks out of 5

Charlie's Angels (2000)

If the goal of the Charlie's Angels reboot was movie escapism on a superficial level, then it succeeded. The whole is heightened by the feeling that the "elite crime fighting trio" of Dylan, Alex and Natalie (Drew Barrymore, Lucy Liu, and Cameron Diaz, respectively) are having a blast while making it. The story is pretty thin and the primary villains are forgettable, but for every weak link (e.g. Sam Rockwell, Tom Green) there's a stronger one doing its utmost to draw attention away from the faults. In the latter category there's Crispin Glover, great use of chart music, playful stereotypes, ridiculous disguises, and a dynamic approach that never misses an opportunity to make its leading ladies shine. And for fans of the original TV series, the voice of John Forsythe.

3 bird calls out of 5

Buffalo Soldiers (2001)

Having no actual 'Buffalo Soldiers' present, nor any direct connection to the Bob Marley song from which it probably took the title, the 'satirical' film stars Joaquin Phoenix as US army Supply Specialist Ray Elwood, who's stationed in West Germany during 1989. When not cooking smack for drug-addicted recruits, Elwood spends his time scheming how to best make a profit on the military black market. He provides an occasional v/o, like Ferris Bueller's less charismatic cousin. And much like Bueller, despite having witnessed first-hand the dire consequences of his actions, his character learns nothing of value in the end. Likewise, I gained nothing of value from watching the work.

1½ non-regulation high dives out of 5

The Last Dinosaur (1977)

In a perfect world, the only living thing that people who hunt for 'sport' would be allowed to shoot are each other. But life isn't like that, and more often than not you'll find a rich person at the head of it. Such is the case with The Last Dino, a US/Japanese co-production between Rankin/Bass and Eiji Tsuburaya's FX studio, Tsuburaya Productions. The pairing produced an English language adventure film in a Lost World setting with kaijū-like dinosaurs (i.e. men in suits). To that location goes the "world's richest man," Masten Thrust (Richard Boone), under the guise of research, but in reality he wants a T-Rex head for his parlour wall. The T-Rex, however, has other ideas.
With very few sympathetic characters, there's little reason to feel sorry for the team when things go wrong. And the mixed message that surfaces, which seems to justify Thrust's murderous tendencies, doesn't help matters.

2 behavioural footprints out of 5

The Mule (2018)

Inspired by true events from the 1980s, the title refers to the practice of transporting illegal drugs across borders, in this case American borders for a Mexican drug cartel by an octogenarian named Earl Stone (Eastwood).
Alas, outside of his courier role Earl is a pretty boring character. The semi-estrangement that exists between him and his family could've added colour, but it's sorely underdeveloped. An attempt to add tension and drama in the form of a pursuing DEA squad headed by an even more bland Bradley Cooper also falls mostly flat. Eastwood keeps things pleasingly traditional in style and direction, but the depth of character and/or interactions that were needed to keep such a one-note story engaging simply weren't there.

2½ pecans out of 5

Cat Shit One (2010)

A short CGI animation (approx 22 mins) directed by Kazuya Sasahara and based on Motofumi Kobayashi's manga of the same name. Technically promoted as the first episode of a series, to date it's the only one to appear, so I'm treating it as a short. It features armed bunnies in a middle eastern war zone. Furry mammals at war with foreign camels may seem comical on the surface, but the work is deadly serious and realistically violent. While the mo-cap animation often feels like video game FMV, the camera follows the action just like it would for live action, successfully placing the viewer in the thick of it.
The story follows two soldiers, Packy and Bota, as they attempt a rescue mission amidst superior enemy numbers. The characterisation is decent, considering how brief it is, and voices in the Japanese version are great.

3½ tailed gunners out of 5

Da 5 Bloods (2020)

Four Vietnam vets return to Saigon (Ho Chi Minh City) to retrieve two things that they were forced to leave behind when their tours of duty ended.
Dir. Spike Lee has used film as political commentary for decades, but I feel obliged to stress that he uses uncensored footage of real world atrocities at the film's beginning (and later) in service of such, arguably blurring any 'objectivity' of the original capture. The remainder of the film gives admirable but unequal importance to a number of social and moral issues, but it's awkwardly stitched together a lot of the time. Between the joins are some scenes that bore and some that stand proud alongside his work of yesteryear. Without meaning to detract from the wonderful performances by the rest of the cast, Delroy Lindo's superb presentation of a man who's slave to his shifting moods is what I'll remember most about Da 5 Bloods.

3 screen ratios out of 5

Shadow (2018)

A written intro tells of how two Kingdoms, Pei and Yang, joined forces to defeat a powerful third, and peacetime followed. But for some in the Kingdom of Pei the loss of their beloved Jing City is too much to bear - one such warrior orchestrates an elaborate plan from his cave to reclaim the lost territory.
It’s as beautiful as Dir. Yimou's previous period films, but in Shadow he paints with tones of grey, inspired by ancient Chinese ink art, with colour reserved mostly for skin tones and blood. The latter respects the cinematographer's dedication, too; it’s suitably red but mercifully not Hollywood super-red.
Establishing the political standings and cowardly and/or resentful attitudes of the main players makes much of the first two acts feel needlessly drawn-out, but the Shakespearean drama in the closing third helps to balance it out.

3 feminine moves out of 5

Boiling Point (1990)

Baseball is a popular sport in Japan. Masaki (Yūrei Yanagi) is a batter, but he isn't any good and his level of enthusiasm for the role appears to match his level in almost all things, which is visibly nil. A chance encounter at his place of employment leads to him drifting into Yakuza company, specifically an impulsive man named Uehara (Takeshi Kitano) and his two companions.
Dir. Kitano's second film saw his style evolve: a method of humour that's deadpan funny without seeming to have any actual jokes - although the loose construction can feel a little like tactically placed skits, so may be off-putting to some folks. It's not an ideal first Kitano film, but if you've seen and enjoyed any of his later (middle period) works, it can be a rewarding experience.

3 overtakings out of 5

Thunderbirds (2004)

A live-action version of Gerry + Sylvia Anderson's much-loved television show was a bad idea to begin with, but whoever decided that the story should have the original members of International Rescue incapacitated for the majority of the running time took the concept of bad ideas to a whole new level of injudiciousness. In place of the core team we get three of their kids, teens who must rise to the challenge and save the organisation's lauded reputation from the schemes of The Hood (Ben Kingsley - WTF?).
Honestly, it's as awful as it sounds. If you're a dedicated fan of the original series, then it may even be worse than it sounds. I kept hoping that the marionette version of International Rescue would fly in to meta-save the world from the live-action version, but it didn't happen.

1 ghastly green screen out of 5

Dolly Parton: Here I Am (2019)

Celebrating Dolly's 50th year at the Grand Ole Opry is as good as reason as any to look back at her remarkable career to date. It's not a definitive look, by any means, but time spent with the star herself makes it wholly worthwhile for fans old and new. There's additional input from fellow songwriters and music business producers, and movie co-stars, most of whom share what the Tennessee-born songbird's heartfelt melodies mean to them.
The bigger than life persona that's like a smile personified keeps media attention on her movements, but it's the songs that make Dolly special. The documentary discusses and lightly dissects a few of them without lessening their power as stories of compassion, sincerity and sympathetic joy.

3 true feelings out of 5

Chennai Express (2013)

The Chennai Express is a train, aboard which forty-year-old bachelor Rahul (Shah Rukh Khan) travels under the pretext of fulfilling the last wish of a recently departed family member. It's there that he meets Meenamma (Deepika Padukone), a woman who throws his plans, the fake one and the actual one, into chaos. The ridiculousness that surfaces therein isn't limited to the locomotive; it stays throughout most of the movie, much to my dismay.
When Dir. Rohit Shetty lets a scene play straight, things go okay, which makes me think that I'd have enjoyed the movie that could've been, but I sure didn't feel that way about the one that it is. Although the beautiful locations, both natural and man-made, were a treat for the eyes.

1½ slow runnings out of 5

VFW (2019)

It stands for Veterans of Foreign Wars, and it wears its influences large and proud on its sleeve, the most prominent being early John Carpenter films. In short, it's like a cross between Assault on Precinct 13 (1976) and Escape from New York (1981), with some of Capcom's Dead Rising video game thrown in.
The basic plot has the residents of a veterans bar under siege from an army of angry druggies. For a while it's bloody great. I wanted to like it all, but the exaggerated colours of 80s nostalgia made me long for it to be over (or for the sun to come up). The music, however, I loved wholesale; it's as Carpenter-esque as the scenario and camerawork and remains captivating throughout.

2½ waltzes out of 5

Masquerade (1988)

An adult drama set in the world of rich folks, some of whom have little else to do besides sail boats and sleep with other people's wives. It's a lifestyle in which backstabbing and deceit go hand in hand, where sincerity and treachery are sometimes interchangeable, but not everyone is of that ilk. The naïve rich girl cliché is one such example, played by the softly spoken Meg Tilly, who fills the (designer) shoes well-enough. Rob Lowe is the suitor to her bank balance, a yachtsman whose objective is money. He's supposed to be surface charming and secretly dangerous, but he's as humdrum as he's been all the other times I've seen him act, which admittedly isn't very many. But as a whole, it feels like a post-watershed TV movie for bored housewives.

2½ cabin rats out of 5

Hearts in Atlantis (2001)

Based upon parts of Stephen King's 1999 unified collection of the same name, it delves into the life of Bobby Garfield (Anton Yelchin). An adult at the beginning, the timeline drifts back to Bobby's eleventh birthday and the days that followed, specifically to events surrounding the appearance of an aged man named Ted Brautigan (Anthony Hopkins) who had a special ability. The old man has a positive affect on the youth, but with every forward step into maturity comes the ache of knowing that once taken it's impossible to go back.
The film's best scenes occur one after another, which makes an impression at the time but result in the remainder of it seeming to move even slower by comparison; the nods to Stand by Me (1986) are similarly double-edged.

2½ inside straights out of 5

Boss (2013)

Boss is better than its promotion might imply (and if you think that poster art is bad, you should see the others). It stars Akshay Kumar as an estranged son who is taken in by a local gangster. Boss grows to be as feared and respected as his mentor/father figure, but he hasn't forgotten his roots nor his prideful father (Mithun Chakraborty). When contracted by a corrupt minister to kill an innocent man, Boss gets an opportunity to act upon what's still in his heart.
The exuberance of Bollywood is in every facet of Boss' character, which gives the film and its lead a truly bigger than life feeling. And slow-mo heavy finale aside, the action scenes are some of the best that I’ve seen from there, even if they are mostly stolen ideas from popular US, French and Thai movies. It takes a dive once or twice (the awful party song), but mostly it keeps buoyant.

3 rocking chairs out of 5

First Knight (1995)

A retelling of the Arthurian legend that eschews much of the lore so that it can push the love triangle to the fore. Alas, the majority of what was removed was useful, weighty stuff that gives the story both its epic feeling and magical spark, and the love story alone has problems. One third of which is Arthur, already an aged King with all the drama of his rise to power left unsaid, betrothed to Genevieve (Julia Ormond), young enough to be his granddaughter, when the film begins. And finally, the dashing but disruptive swordsman Lancelot, the film's 'first knight', is a passionless Richard Gere.
Costumes and settings are pretty to look at, and there's a wonderful round table scene, but it's primarily Connery as the pained (Scottish) British King in the latter half that gives the film anything of note in the acting department.

2½ ambushes out of 5

Dogtown and Z-Boys (2001)

It's probably pretty obvious to an onlooker that skateboarding was influenced by surfing, but for the story of how advancements in technology enabled an explosion of creativity, and how a collective punk attitude shaped the current state of the sport, you need to go to Dogtown; i.e. Santa Monica in the mid 70s. Directed by a key member of the original Zephyr team (Stacy Peralta), it's a spirited look at both the activity itself and the attitudes of the skaters who pushed it beyond mere pastime into a fully expressive way of life.
The old 8 and 16 mm footage is a highlight, but so too is the soundtrack: Black Sabbath, Bowie, Alice Cooper, Pink Floyd, Stooges, Hendrix, Neil Young, and more. When put together they make a good documentary even better. And if you don't like the format, there's a dramatised biopic version of the story.

3½ points of evolution out of 5

10 to Midnight (1983)

Charles Bronson is probably best remembered for playing characters that operated outside of the law. In 10 to Midnight he plays a seasoned police lieutenant named Kessler whose duty requires him to stay within it. His partner is a younger man (Andrew Stevens) who strives to meet Kessler's standards; he's okay with the situation, until he's required to meet his own. The duo hunt an ego-driven serial killer (Gene Davis) who murders with a knife while naked.
Even though it's a police drama, it relies on Bronson's anti-hero persona much of the time. The violence walks a fine line between exploitative and daring, but may not seem like either if unfairly judged by today's standards.

2½ poker hands out of 5

Ek Main Aur Ekk Tu (2012)

Twenty-five-year-old Rahul Kapoor (Imran Khan) hasn't lived up to the differing expectations that his overbearing parents have for him. He's introverted, wears a tank-top and likes to keep things tidy. Riana Braganza (Kareena Kapoor), on the other hand, lives for the moment - preferably if the moment involves a party. They couldn't be more different, which makes them the kind of ingredients that get thrown together in movie rom-coms.
Set in Vegas and India, it begins on Xmas, progressing through approx two weeks, but it encompasses Rahul's entire life thus far, because before you can come out of your shell you first have to place yourself inside of one. Like its leading man starts out, the film is a clear-cut case of lacking a vital spark.

2½ toppings out of 5

The Order (2001)

After an opening scene set in the year 1099, telling of the First Crusade in Israel, the film jumps to modern day Ukraine where Rudy Cafmeyer (Jean-Claude van Damme) is stealing something that he's no legal claim to. Later, after some poorly acted scenes, the charisma-vacuum goes on a quest to find his archaeologist father. There's an Israeli police lieutenant (Sofia Milos) who exists to be a helpful cliché, and, because it's 'movie' Middle East, a religious zealot (Brian Thompson) with a bomb who wants to start a Holy War.
In a way that the filmmakers likely hadn't planned, viewing The Order enriched my life, because I vow that the next time I see a film with JCVD as the leading man, I won't waste a single second of my time on it.

1 pleasure trip out of 5

Triple Threat (2019)

If art for arts sake is a widely accepted philosophy, then action for action's sake must also be a thing. And while I acknowledge that a visual media like cinema can exist without any didactic need to explain itself beyond its own autotelic value, I prefer to have a little story in my action movies. Triple Threat delivers both, with emphasis on 'action' and the 'little' being literal.
A mission to free Thai prisoners from Indonesian captors ends in a massacre and a double-cross, leaving wronged parties on both sides. What follows is a story of payback involving many squibs and some of Southeast Asia's best martial artists, the kind who prove that well-choreographed action can itself be an art form. The dialogue is mostly English language, with some Chinese and Thai. It's occasionally badly dubbed, but it's tolerable.

2½ local assistants out of 5

The Devil and Father Amorth (2017)

Over four decades after he staged a pretend exorcism (and made cinema history as a result), director William Friedkin filmed a "real" one performed by Father Gabriele Amorth, a revered and respected member of the Diocese of Rome. Friedkin presents and narrates his own footage, referencing often the film that made his name, so expect spoilers for The Exorcist (1973).
Prior to the main event there's interview footage of authors William Peter Blatty and Jeffrey Burton Russell. Afterwards the medical community, experts in the fields of neurosurgery and psychiatry, comment on what the viewer has just seen. There's no definitive resolution. Instead, as with the fictional film, a viewer will likely see in the footage their own beliefs reflected back at them, with regards both sides of the incident; i.e. authenticity or artifice.

2 trance states out of 5

The Duel (2016)

Texas Ranger David Kingston (Liam Hemsworth) is sent to investigate the disappearance of a number of Mexican citizens in Mount Hermon, a Texan town, which brings him into contact with a man he's not seen for twenty-two years. The man is Abraham Brant (Woody Harrelson), who, since their last meeting in rain and blood, has supposedly been "touched by God".
There's a decent sense of hostility in the townsfolk, but Hemsworth is pretty bland much of the time, coming alive only when armed and angered. In contrast, there's a hint of Colonel Kurtz about Harrelson's Abraham, leading with a hospitality that's threatening. The supporting characters feel very 'written' for purpose, including Abraham's son Isaac (Emory Cohen), who's both a thorn in the Ranger's side and a bitter disappointment to his father.

2½ dust coverings out of 5

Ponyo (2008)

aka Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea

A creepy human-faced fish hitches a ride on a jellyfish, leaving behind its equally creepy-faced siblings. Ponyo, as the free-loader comes to be called, is rescued by five-year-old Sōsuke, and so begins a magical friendship.
At least, that was the idea, but it didn't feel very magical to me for a long time. Besides a spectacular scene involving Ponyo and a storm, the first hour felt more like two. But things changed for the final third. The relationship between the two children grew deeper and it became reminiscent of My Neighbour Totoro (1988). Ponyo's 'everything is new and exciting' attitude became uplifting, and the adventure took on new life. The destructive tides and planets situation seemed a step too far, but the story redeemed itself emotionally, which is what saved it in my eyes. But I won't watch it twice.

3 nap times out of 5

Talaash: The Answer Lies Within (2012)

Not a sequel to the similarly titled Talaash: The Hunt Begins... (2003), The Answer Lies Within is a search for a different truth. Namely, why popular film star Armaan Kapoor (Vivan Bhatena) was seen speeding in a car through a shady part of town, before veering off the road and into the ocean depths.
Inspector Surjan Singh Shekhawat (Aamir Khan), a man with a crippling tragedy in his past, leads the case. The tone of the film reflects Surjan's feelings mostly, with moody lighting and music to match. The investigation becomes two-tiered, professional and personal, affecting the inspector's life and that of his wife Roshni (Rani Mukerji), who deals with the past in her own way.
One crappy train station scene aside, I feel that Dir. Reema Kagti respected both the psychological and unnatural threads of the story equally.

4 white petals out of 5

The Wizard (1989)

Corey (Fred Savage) accompanies his half-brother Jimmy (Luke Edwards) to California, for reasons that only one of the children understand. Along the way the siblings meet travelling teen Haley (Jenny Lewis) and, without going into detail why, video games become an important feature of their world.
It's a road movie for kids that seems rooted in the era it was released because of the video games (arcade Double Dragon, NES Ninja Gaiden, TMNT, etc), but its themes of bonding, self-realisation and awakenings of self-worth are timeless. The handling of each one is varied, but there's enough to make the journey worthwhile. Its attempt to make the Nintendo Power Glove seem cool are less successful, but it's nothing to be ashamed of - Nintendo failed too.

2½ happy wanderings out of 5

Powaqqatsi (1988)

aka Powaqqatsi: Life in Transformation

Dir. Reggio's follow up to Koyaanisqatsi (1982) is another spellbinding assemblage of real life captured on film but with a focus this time on the affect of agriculture and industrialisation in third world countries.
The expert eye of the filmmaker is cast over various locations and activities, in CUs and aerial shots, while the music of Philip Glass adds deeper allusions.
The second half of the film, in which cars interrupt and obscure the focal point was obviously purposeful, but it lacks the emotional power of the first half.
Overall, though, there's a feeling that a shared experience, even one that can be described as a burden, can perhaps be a kind of dance that takes on new meaning when observed from a specific vantage point.

3½ distributions out of 5

Invaders from Mars (1986)

Young David Gardner (Hunter Carson) watches a meteor shower from the safety of his bedroom window one night, but in addition to falling rocks he sees an alien spaceship land not far from his home, on Copper Hill. Not long afterwards, the adults in the surrounding area begin to act oddly.
A remake of the 1953 film of the same name that on paper has a lot going for it: directed by Tobe Hooper, it co-stars Karen Black, has creature effects by Stan Winston and music by Christopher Young. The result is a peculiar PG rated movie with glorious 80s FX and some set-bound campness in the later half. It's not usual for a youth in a movie for kids to be braver than the adults, but in Black's case it's because her character (a school nurse) understands the implications more than the child, which successfully adds some depth.

2½ sinkholes out of 5

The Flintstones (1994)

I occasionally watched repeats of the original Hanna-Barbera cartoon as a kid, but I don't consider myself a fan of the show. I tried the film for one reason only: Liz Taylor, who plays Pearl Slaghoople (Fred's mother-in-law); but in reference to casting it's John Goodman who's most perfect in his role.

The story sees the 'modern Stone Age family' have their loyalties tested when an unexpected class division causes a rift between best friends Fred and Barney (Rick Moranis). Its U rating means it's mostly average kids stuff, but there are some genuinely funny gags, and a few very dark humoured ones.

The star of the show for me was the props and sets — the majority of which would've had to have been built and/or moulded from scratch — and the practical creature effects provided by Jim Henson's Creature Shop.

2 dictabirds out of 5