Blink Twice (2024)

Two women are invited by a charming billionaire to his private resort for a holiday in debauchery. Strange, unexplainable occurrences take place around them as one of the women disappears and none of the other tenants can recall her presence. Zoë Kravitz's directorial debut is a slick mystery-thriller with an all-star cast and more than a few tricks up its sleeve. Unfortunately, my screening of the film contained a trigger warning at the very beginning which gave away certain plot details that effectively spoiled the twist and undercut its themes. I cannot for the life of me understand why we have to be so sheltered, even in mass-produced, mainstream Hollywood entertainment, but here we are.

In all honesty, it's not a bad flick, but it loses a ½ rating for the patronizing TW.

2½ red rabbits out of 5

The Wizard (1989)

Corey (Fred Savage) accompanies his half-brother Jimmy (Luke Edwards) to California, for reasons that only one of the children understand. Along the way the siblings meet travelling teen Haley (Jenny Lewis) and, without going into detail why, video games become an important feature of their world.
It's a road movie for kids that seems rooted in the era it was released because of the video games (arcade Double Dragon, NES Ninja Gaiden, TMNT, etc), but its themes of bonding, self-realisation and awakenings of self-worth are timeless. The handling of each one is varied, but there's enough to make the journey worthwhile. Its attempt to make the Nintendo Power Glove seem cool are less successful, but it's nothing to be ashamed of - Nintendo failed too.

2½ happy wanderings out of 5

The Legend of Billie Jean (1985)

It's a hot day in Texas and without trying Billie Jean raises the temperature of the local horn-dogs ever higher. One dumb-shit act of machismo by the worst of them leads to repercussions, which in turn leads to a teen-movie outlaw situation that’s utterly ridiculous but somehow entertaining.
Eighties teen movies were different to their modern equivalent; they were simpler, less hurried and usually a lot more fun.
The music of Billy Idol and Pat Benatar that’s used in the soundtrack fits the film’s vibe perfectly: an orchestrated story of safe rebellion in response to the underlying sting of acquiescence that accompanies growing up.

3 handwritten I.O.U notes out of 5

Pump Up the Volume (1990)

Happy Harry Hard-on is a faceless voice on a pirate radio station speaking directly to the disaffected youth of a small town in Arizona. His listeners connect to what he says because he’s one of them; he goes to the same school and sits in the same classes day after day assimilating the same shit. The adults, feeling their hold threatened, move to hand out sentence.
Slater was excellent in the outsider role back in those days. He could remain calm on the surface but secret into his tones instances of Jack Nicholson violence, which, when you think about it, is a perfect fit for radio anarchy.
See it first when young (if it’s not too late) for maximum appreciation.

3½ jams kicked out of 5

Untamed Heart (1993)

Marisa Tomei plays a pretty, friendly waitress who chases after love often, but in spite of her nature is never able to catch and hold onto it. She seldom sees the sweet guy with a weak heart who works as a busboy at the same diner as she does. But he notices her, every day.
There’s not much more to say. It’s mostly predictable, but that doesn't make it boring. It’s a simple, heartfelt story told beautifully. People allergic to that kind of thing will likely hate it. Alternatively, people with a heart suffering from neglect may find it's just the treat they need to nourish it.

4 walks home out of 5

El Gringo (2012)

A tough guy with a bag full of money gets stuck in a dusty Mexican town full of people who want the bag. You can guess the rest.
Flashbacks flesh out the hero’s past and introduce some extra players.
It’s similar to Robert Rodriguez's Mexico Trilogy, but the horrible, exaggerated glare of the sun bleaches everything ugly, making even the interesting scenes a struggle to endure. Plus, it’s too long. It's a low budget film and it feels as if whoever assembled it wanted to use every inch of footage they could. A more discerning editor could've shaved twenty minutes off the running time to the film's betterment.

2 stray dogs out of 5

Interview with the Vampire (1994)

Anne Rice’s homoerotic fantasy vampire novel got gelded somewhat for its transition to the screen but it retained much of the atmosphere that was prevalent in the source. It succeeded in both keeping the gothic allure while simultaneously stripping the immortal of his mystery and painting him as a pained and tragic character.
Having read the novel, I’d not have picked Cruise to play Lestat, but he did a fine job at being a prick. Reports say Brad Pitt was miserable during the shoot, and it shows. It suits his character, but there are times a little more passion for the material would've elevated it to even greater heights.

3½ strange comforts out of 5

BULLET TO THE HEAD [2013]

Sly Stallone and The Fast & The Furious' Sung Kang drive around killing people in director Walter Hill's Bullet To The Head, an adaptation of Alex Nolent's graphic novel Du Plomb Dans La Tete.
It's pretty much cinematic trash that seems like it was scripted by an uneducated adolescent with absolutely nothing worthwhile to say.  With films like these you would at least expect some sort of thought put into the kill sequences or the one-liners but there is none of that to be seen.  The film is simply void of any appeal whatsoever.

½ headshot out of 5

Heathers (1988)

Once upon a time Christian Slater made good films. Heathers is one of them. It’s a darkly satirical comedy set in a typical American high school that experiences a sudden upsurge in teen suicide.
Parts of it have aged badly, like most 80's movies, but the biting satire is still relevant and the subject matter equally as controversial.
It’s like a John Hughes high school movie gone bad.

3 bitches deserved it out of 5

Dolan's Cadillac (2009)

Christian Slater plays a mobster with his fingers deep in trafficking. His bad acting clashes with Wes Bentley’s bad acting and it’s left to Emmanuelle Vaugier to keep the film from falling into a giant-sized pot hole. They should've used her more. She was one of three things that kept it from being ejected from my player. The second thing was the director's passion for the material. And finally, the material itself; it was based on a Stephen King short that owed a huge debt to Edgar Allan Poe. I love Poe.

2½ specific varieties of Sherry out of 5

Broken Arrow (1996)

One of John Woo's American films. It’s light on the traditional Woo motifs, meaning it has little to interest his fans. Instead, it appealed to a popcorn-munching audience who prefer to see a helicopter blow up than a protagonist torn between duty and honour.

2 bad actors and a rabble of butterflies out of 5

SLIPSTREAM [2007]

Sir Anthony Hopkins writes, directs and stars in this surreal piece of cinema suitably titled Slipstream.
Feeling like a David Lynch narrative edited by the drug-inspired side of Oliver Stone, Hopkins never allows the film to plant it's feet in reality long enough for viewer to grasp onto anything meaningful. It's an interesting experience, from an artistic point of view but the effect wears off pretty quickly and becomes borderline irritating.

2½ doll heads out of 5

TRUE ROMANCE [1993]

Hookers. Cocaine. Guns.
...and Elvis.
Quentin Tarantino's first screenplay for the Tony Scott directed True Romance is a wild and stylish romp of a road movie. Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette lead an all-star ensemble supporting cast through a fantastical, glamorized violent world that looks more fun than intimidating. It's a little immature and offensive at times but this is Tarantino so it should be expected.
Filled with characters so stereotypical it's gleefully absurd, an in your face "too cool" soundtrack and Gary Fucking Oldman in one of his best roles, True Romance is a pulp cult classic that is pure guilty fun.

4 tips of the hat to Gassenhauer out of 5