Wake Up Dead Man (2025)

The third in the Knives Out series surrounds a murder in the ranks of a parish when a young priest butts heads with the thorny Monsignor. It's a locked-room ("impossible crime") mystery where Benoit Blanc attempts to prove innocence and clear their name. Daniel Craig settles into the role like an old comfortable shoe, while the film itself feels tonally different from the rest, but it's very much worth a spin in all of its complexity and density. I hope Rian Johnson keeps making these films forever because he has a real knack for the genre.

3½ roads to Damascus out of 5

The Batman (2022)

Does a Batman movie need to be 3 hours? No. No, it doesn't. This film takes the "throw everything at the wall and see what sticks" approach. It brings the series to an even darker and grim direction than Nolan did, managing to make it feel dreary and depressing. And, it's simply not enjoyable. The recent trend of reboots seems to be to suck all the fun out of these movies and make it as miserable for the audience as possible. My biggest gripe is that it takes itself way too seriously. Everyone talks and moves slowly, as if they're underwater. Robert Pattinson does a serviceable enough job as Emo Batman, but he's even duller as Bruce Wayne. Zoë Kravitz feels like she's going through the motions as Catwoman, Colin Farrell is buried beneath pounds of make-up and a fat suit as Penguin, while Paul Dano's trash bag makes Jim Carrey's Riddler seem absolutely inspired. It all feels like a pale imitation of what's come before. At this point, it's just a rehash upon a rehash. Everything we've seen here has already been done better.

Anyway, barring all that, if you're a ride or die fan, you'll probably enjoy it. I didn't, but I can see why others might. This is basically Batman meets Zodiac. There is a decent movie to be found within this mess, but unfortunately you have to sort through a lot of fluff to get there.

2½ thumb drives out of 5

The Ides of March (2011)

US Politics = yawn. But when the cast includes Philip Seymour Hoffman, Paul Giamatti, Marisa Tomei, and George Clooney (who also directed the feature and contributed to the adaptation of the source play, Farragut North, by Beau Willimon) then I'm damn well going to watch it regardless!
It's a well-made melodrama, but unfortunately the main focus of the story is a junior campaign manager played by Ryan Gosling who's about as interesting as a paper cut, although it's a welcome relief that it isn't all about the election campaign itself. Gosling's character comes alive a little during his interactions with a young female intern named Molly (great work by Evan Rachel Wood), but not enough to make me care about his role.

3 job descriptions out of 5

THE GOOD DINOSAUR [2015]

2015 saw one of Pixar Animation's greatest achievements with Inside Out and, now with director Peter Sohn's feature length debut The Good Dinosaur, it's seen one of it's biggest fumbles as well.
The touching story of a dinosaur & his cave-boy, who bond as they journey through the savage wilderness in hopes to find their ways back home doesn't quite make it's mark.  
It features all the usual Pixar ingredients to make for a good time, including humor, a wide variety of colorful characters, beautifully rendered animation and a unique look at the world.  However it's missing the inventive storytelling full of depth and sophistication we've all come to expect from the studio, making it far from memorable compared to it's more mature predecessors.
It might not live up to the studios usual standards but it never feels like you're wasting your time because you could probably being doing a lot worse when it comes to the family-friendly films.

3 oddly placed drug trips out of 5

THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY - PART 1 [2014]

Director Francis Lawrence returns to The Hunger Games series with Mockingjay - Part 1, the first part of the adaptation of the final book.
With nary a game being played, the film is pretty much just overly drawn out scenes of Katniss Everdeen going from place to place looking horrified at the bleak world around her.  It's few action sequences lack the intensity of the first two films while the dramatic arcs feel padded with pointless filler dialogue, I presume mostly to fill up time to chop the book into two films.  Thankfully it's littered with great performances embedded into this fascinating world that is lessened by it's unfortunate bland execution.

2 lucky cats out of 5

ONLY LOVERS LEFT ALIVE [2013]

There are no sparkly bloodsuckers to be seen in director Jim Jarmusch's oddball vampire love story Only Lovers Left Alive.
With it's subtle sense of humor, love for music, wicked fashion sense, vast knowledge of literature, claustrophobic photography and some particularly fantastic performances from Tom Hiddleston and Tilda Swinton, Jarmusch crafts a refreshing take on the vampire genre.  It's gloomy but manages a sly smirk on it's face throughout which makes for a delightful experience that any fan of the actors and director will revel in.

4 sunglasses out of 5

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)

Catching Fire is both an excellent adaptation and a sequel that improves on its predecessor in every way. Gone is the shaky cam and the confusing narrative. In its place is a two and a half hour movie that doesn't feel boring for a second.

The movie isn't perfect - there's a lot more telling than showing, and a few of the performances aren't stellar - but as a whole, it's pretty great. The cast is stuffed with good actors and Jennifer Lawrence is especially fantastic. I'm not sure this would be enjoyed by anyone who's not a fan of the franchise, but it's a solid film I look forward to seeing again.

3.5 hilarious faces in elevators out of 5.

A SINGLE SHOT [2013]

Director David M. Rosenthal really lays down the dreary atmosphere in the slow-burn backwoods suspense film A Single Shot.
Sam Rockwell is exceptionally excellent as a poverty-stricken hunter that stumbles upon a small fortune of cash after he accidentally kills a girl mistaking her for a deer.  It's beautifully shot with it's muted colors and haunting landscapes, which is all complimented with composer Atli Örvarsson's chilling Penderecki-esque score.   Quite a bit of the dialogue is difficult to understand, due to the character's mumbling and many will find it too slow to fully appreciate but it rewards with Rockwell's performance.

3½ dead girls wrapped in plastic out of 5

EXTREMELY LOUD & INCREDIBLY CLOSE [2011]

Director Stephen Daldry puts on his schmaltzy Oscar suit for the adaptation of Jonathan Safran Foer's 9/11 aftermath novel Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close.

The story itself could have had great intentions but got lost along the way to ruthlessly tug at the heart strings and make us feel good.  Those intentions are so crystal clear it's pretty offensive the producers didn't think anybody would see right through this Oscar bait bullshit.
What a manipulative pile of shit.  

1 answer in the palm of the hand out of 5

LADY IN THE WATER [2006]

M. Night Shyamalan's "bedtime story" Lady In The Water is a universally panned film that I find hard not liking.  

Sure it's got an uneven plot, questionable dialogue and terribly written characters, but the mood, performances and music are great.  Shyamalan had balls to make a film like this when the big thing in mainstream cinema were manboy superheros and boy wizards.  It's nothing more than wide-eyed storytelling that serves it's purpose in entertainment.

3 giant fap-arms out of 5