In a Nutshell. Mini reviews of movies old and new. No fuss. No spoilers. And often no sleep.

Tuesday, 2 August 2016

A TALKING CAT!?! [2013]

David DeCoteau wisely hides under the guise of Mary Crawford as the director of the undeniably shit-sational A Talking Cat!?!
Duffy (meticulously portrayed by Squeaky the Cat) has the power of slurred speech so he uses it to help a pack of human waste come together.
Nobody in this movie acts or talks like a normal human being, leading me to believe Squeaky was the mastermind behind this baffling script that seems like it's 40% of overly long establishing shots.  Eric Roberts as the voice of Duffy, sounds so defeated in life I wonder how often he could be found crying in the bathroom in between takes.
Besides it's unintentional homo-erotic undertones and the fact that it's clearly filmed on the set of gay porn films, the movie is pretty safe for the kidlets.  That's if you need to rapidly dissolve their unsuspecting brains into a quivering puddle of feline diarrhea.

1 cheese puff out of 5


Dr Faustus said...

Even the cover is bad.
It's like My First Photoshop Project (for ages 5 and under).

budarc said...

Save some of that venom for Nine Lives with Kevin Spacey.

cuckoo said...

Bud, even you didn't see this one?


Yeah...Nine Lives...
...if it shows up on the movie channel before the end of year I might Nut it but if not, it's just going to get buried.

Neg said...

The cover only drives home what I was talking about. The kids look literally copy and pasted.

budarc said...

Le Cuck,

I gave up on the talking cat genre in 2004 around the time Garfield: The Movie came out. It's the closest any movie has come to "ruining" my childhood memories of such a beloved character. Although they too are rebooting that one in a new Peanuts-style animated movie in 2017, so I may finally be able to forgive past transgressions. :P

cuckoo said...

XD I never saw the Garfield movies.
I actually think this was the first talking cat movie I've ever seen.
...probably the last one too.

budarc said...

Yeah, the only other one I can think of is Grumpy Cat's Worst Christmas Ever, which I almost want to see just so I can hear Aubrey Plaza's voice coming out of that ugly mug.

cuckoo said...

"Almost want to see" is exactly how I feel about Grumpy Cat too. XD
I quite like Plaza but not enough to sit through Grumpy Cat and all it's shittiness.