Stay Tuned (1992)

One of my favorite films as a kid that probably won't connect with everyone. If you were obsessed with television in the '80s and '90s, it'll strike a certain chord. A suburban couple is hooked up with a big screen TV and a satellite dish promising 666 channels, but the price is their immortal soul. They must survive 24 hours in the television landscape as they bounce from channel to channel. All of this is an excuse to parody everything from sitcoms, cartoons and music videos. This movie is amazing and I won't listen to anyone who says otherwise.

Feels a bit like a love child between Beetlejuice and Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

3½ horrifying meta realizations out of 5

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

Fourth-wall breaking Ferris is a confidently cocky role model for liars and phonies. He decides to take a day off school, but needs others to share in his fun lest his calculated brilliance go unnoticed. Enter the reluctant Cameron (Alan Ruck), the film's best character. On the surface Ferris is well-presented, but surface is all he is, whereas Cameron has depth and learns from his experiences. The third member of the group is Ferris' girlfriend (Mia Sara), whose role is mostly to smile wryly or sympathetically in reaction shots.
The determined school Principal (Jeffrey Jones), an authority figure that's mocked not just by students but by his own ill-considered actions, serves as a counterpoint to Bueller's carefree cleverness, but he's borderline slapstick. All in all, FB is an entertaining but much overrated John Hughes flick.

3 close calls out of

HOWARD THE DUCK [1986]

The big-screen adaptation of Marvel's Howard The Duck was Willard Huyck's last directing credit to date and with good reason: it's as bad as everyone says it is.
It tells the same old story of an alien duck who's dragged kicking and screaming from his home-world and into ours where he learns of our planet's good and bad attributes.
With a better script it might have been a hokey but hilarious study of our people but instead it attempts to make us laugh with horrible one-liners and very little substance.  With it's mildly adult jokes (and duck tits) it's clearly not for children but the film is so inane it can't possibly be for anybody older than 12 either.  Executive producer George Lucas said it'll probably be more appreciated in the future but this is coming from the guy who brought us Red Tails, Strange Magic and the midichlorians.

1 Cajun Sushi joint out of 5

Ed Wood (1994)

A ‘mostly true’ biopic of film maker Ed Wood, known affectionately as the world’s worst director. It’s one of the many Tim Burton films starring Johnny Depp, so you’ll likely know right off the bat if you’re going to love it or hate it. Depp occasionally acts like Christian Slater, which is a little irritating, but mostly he’s on fine form.
What makes the film extra special for me is Martin Landau; his performance as a crotchety old washed up horror actor is filled with a deeply tender pathos that gives the film much needed heart. Seeing him act alongside his daughter Juliet was also fun. I like her.
Is Burton’s wife in it? Yes, of course she is. Stupid question.

4 painted pie plates out of 5

SLEEPY HOLLOW [1999]

Director Tim Burton and Se7en screenwriter Andrew Kevin Walker loosely adapt Washington Irving's The Legend Of Sleepy Hollow and turn it into a slasher flick homage to the Hammer films.

It's visually stunning, musically powerful and features a top-notch performance from Johnny Depp, but a script that stinks of multiple rewrites and an awkward performance from Christina Ricci drags it down a bit, sometimes brining nearly bringing the pacing to a complete halt.  

It's not quite a film to lose your head over but enough to please Burton/Depp fans.

3½ bleeding Trees Of Death out of 5

Devil's Advocate (1997)

Keanu steps out of his comfort zone and plays a smart guy for a change. He does it well, which is doubly impressive as he shares screen time with Al Pacino and still manages to impress. Pacino gets to overact as usual, but the role calls for that kind of hoo-hah, so it’s most welcome. The film has some great dialogue and if not for the facepalm ending (which admittedly would've worked well on paper, but sucks ass on screen) I'd have scored it higher. Hit stop five minutes before the end and make it a better film.

3½ money turns people into assholes out of 5

Beetlejuice (1988)

This was the movie that made Tim Burton a household name for me. I watched this so many times as a kid, it borders on creepy/psychotic. Michael Keaton is inspired as the "Ghost with the Most" and Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis have great fun as the dead couple who have to deal with the gaudy new family that move into their house. Winona Ryder is equally amazing as the dark, Gothic girl (decades before emo). I love this movie so much, I can't even verbalize it into words. So I'll have to settle for: "It's showtime."

5 Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice's out of 5

Ravenous (1999)

Haven't seen this one in over a decade. It holds up. Starting out as what seems to be a promising dark comedy ("Eat me!"), it soon takes on a deadly serious (and sick) tone. Like any good movie about cannibalism, the gore factor is up there and this one does not disappoint. The memorable score by Michael Nyman and Damon Albarn sets up an unsettling atmosphere that elevates the movie above its source material. Not a perfect film...but you are what you eat. (?)

3.5 Bloody, Gnawed Off Femurs out of 5