Legend (1985)

The tale of a fair maiden, a boy who is pure at heart, and an unholy presence who casts a shadow over their love, descending the world into eternal winter.

I unabashedly defend this film despite all its flaws. And there are many. It's a family friendly fantasy full of wonder and darkness. Not much happens for a large part of this film. Intellectually and emotionally shallow, the strength of its charm comes through gorgeous visuals and evocation of mood. The bloated budget lends to its broad appeal, filling its halls with goblins, elves and fairies, while Tim Curry is an intimidating presence as Lord of Darkness. It's not quite The Princess Bride and it isn't Labyrinth, but it exists somewhere in between those worlds in my mind. I would want to live within any frame of this film.

3½ unicorn horns out of 5

Note: Infamously, there are three different versions of this film (not unlike Blade Runner and Brazil), from the shorter U.S. theatrical version (with music by Tangerine Dream) to the longer European and director's cuts with the original, restored score by Jerry Goldsmith. In an attempt to be as fair as possible, my rating represents an average mean across all three iterations.

The Life of Chuck (2024)

Mike Flanagan continues his successful collaborative effort with Stephen King in this spellbinding esoteric mystery revolving around a dude named Chuck.

Truth be told, the less said the better. Go into it blind as I did. It had a profound effect on me, even as I discovered how it all pieced together early in Act III.

This one won't be for the Materialists.

Proves that there are still great King adaptations to come.

4½ multitudes out of 5

Timecop (1994)

Often cited by Jean-Claude Van Damme devotees as being one of the star's better efforts, Dir. Peter Hyams' film is a time-hopping sci-fi actioner with some awful fight scenes that are badly shot and even more poorly assembled. The film relies on clichés built atop clichés and the comic-booky plot frequently makes little sense and/or contradicts its own established rules.
As for Van Damme, he brings nothing of value to the role that many equally physical actors couldn't have did just as well (or better). His chemistry with onscreen wife Mia Sara, his love for whom is supposed to be a crucial aspect of characterisation, is laughable, as is her unsurprisingly bad acting. If you're not a JCVD fan, there may be very little to interest you in Timecrap.

1 breakable window out of 5

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

Fourth-wall breaking Ferris is a confidently cocky role model for liars and phonies. He decides to take a day off school, but needs others to share in his fun lest his calculated brilliance go unnoticed. Enter the reluctant Cameron (Alan Ruck), the film's best character. On the surface Ferris is well-presented, but surface is all he is, whereas Cameron has depth and learns from his experiences. The third member of the group is Ferris' girlfriend (Mia Sara), whose role is mostly to smile wryly or sympathetically in reaction shots.
The determined school Principal (Jeffrey Jones), an authority figure that's mocked not just by students but by his own ill-considered actions, serves as a counterpoint to Bueller's carefree cleverness, but he's borderline slapstick. All in all, FB is an entertaining but much overrated John Hughes flick.

3 close calls out of