Apartment 7A (2024)

New York City, 1965. A young dancer injures herself during a performance and is promptly blacklisted from future opportunities. Unable to pay her rent, she accepts an elderly couple's kind offer to come stay in their spare room at the ominous Bramford Apartment. The other tenants also get involved in her life, yadda yadda yadda, suddenly she feels her belly start growing. 

In case it hasn't become clear yet (and the poster above didn't tip you off), this is the prequel to Polanski's Rosemary's Baby (1968). This one had lofty shoes to fill, but it feels too distinctly glossy and modern to build up the necessary dread and creepy atmosphere. Since we already know everything that's coming, there are very few surprises, and it doesn't do anything to stand out on its own. The lead performances are strong, but unfortunately, it fails to make an impact like the original.

2 tannis roots out of 5

SISTERS [2015]

Pitch Perfect director Jason Moore's Sisters reunites SNL vets Tina Fey & Amy Poehler with much greater success than their previous big screen effort, Baby Mama.
Two 40-something sisters decide to throw a raging house party before their parents sell their cherished childhood home.
It's a humorous twist to have "mature" adults instead of the usual frat-pack partake in this sort of debauchery, even if does occasionally it does forget that's part of the joke and comes off as just plain sad.  There's plenty of great laugh out loud moments amidst the alcohol & drug-infused chaos but it grows a little thin at it's overly long 2 hour running time.  Thankfully, the chemistry of it's two leads and funny supporting cast make the trip seem a little shorter.
Like the drunken characters, you'll come out of it knowing you had fun but don't remember much.

2½ queefs on a yoga ball out of 5

PASSENGERS [2008]

If it weren't for click-and-instantly-watch-them services like Netflix and Video On Demand, I'd probably never see ho-hum films like Rodrigo Garcia's snoozy supernatural thriller Passengers.
A grief counsellor is assigned to work with a group of odd-ball plane-crash survivors that all seem to be part of something bigger.  Well. I'll tell you I had the whole thing figured out not even 10 minutes into the what was supposed to be a suspenseful story.
For what it lacks in originality and mystery it somewhat makes up for with a well-rounded cast that seem to be giving it more than what the material really deserves.  If you like any of the actors involved then it might be worth watching for that...if not, then skip it.

2 barking dogs out of 5

SYNECDOCHE, NEW YORK [2008]

Like a melding of a Proust and Kafka novel adapted into film by Fellini, writer Charlie Kaufman's  post-modern drama directorial debut Synecdoche, New York is a dizzying tale that saunters between depression, dementia, death and decay.
The late Philip Seymour Hoffman plays a dying theatre director that becomes so consumed by his work, his grasp on the difference between fiction and reality are heavily blurred.  The film explores so many themes and motifs in it's unconventional plot, it'd be a task to list them all off but with some dedication to the film, the viewer will find all sorts of thoughtful goodies on it's many puzzling street corners.  It's a difficult film to enjoy as entertainment but an enticing one from a film-making and creative writing standpoint.

3½ ends built into the beginnings out of 5

DAN IN REAL LIFE [2007]

Writer/director Peter Hedges does such a good job at writing family turmoil I'm not quite sure I'm always comfortable with it, even when it's a harmless comedy-drama like Dan In Real Life.

Steve Carell and Juliette Binoche do an exceptional job as the realistically written pair unwillingly falling for each other.  It's simple and not particularly original but the cast and the characters keep it from getting too stale or tiresome.  Just a pleasant view and nothing more or less.

3 murderers of love out of 5

THE LOST BOYS [1987]

Joel Schumacher is a real hit and miss filmmaker. Fortunately, his venture into the vampire lore is a supremely entertaining and funny one.
It's slick, stylish and silly with a kick-ass '80's soundtrack to boot.
Normally you'd ask yourself what the hell am I watching, with lines like "Holy shit! It's the attack of Eddie Munster" or "We trashed the one that looked like Twisted Sister" but somehow The Lost Boys pulls it off with smirking grace.
Corey Feldman and Jamison Newlander steal the show as self-proclaimed vampire hunters, Edgar and Allen Frog.
It's not necessarily scary but it's a wild romp and funny at all the right moments.
Just the way teen vampire flicks should be.

3 ½ Greased up muscly saxophone players of 5

Edward Scissorhands (1990)

Boy with scissors for hands meets girl, falls in love, and is promptly ostracized by society for being different. There's not much else I can say about this. It's simply my favorite movie of all time. Dark, moody, brooding, sad, happy, innocent, inventive, tragic, funny. Contains all the pathos and visual splendor to be found in my heart and my soul. Edward will always be representative of how I feel about the rest of the world...cut off, lonely, and misunderstood.

5 Ice Dances out of 5