Gone in 60 Seconds (2000)

In order to save his reckless younger sibling from a fate worse than the film itself, brother Nick is tasked with stealing many cars, an activity that he retired from six years previously. But he's the selfless hero type, so after some badly scripted and hackneyed soul searching he obliges.
To its credit it adds a lot of story that wasn't in the original H.B. Halicki version (1974), but none of the additions are particularly interesting - some are even ruinous, nonsensical and weigh the plot down rather than lift it up.
One thing it does almost as well as its source is manage to be representative of the era in which it was made. Unfortunately, that means it replaces 70s chic with woeful 00's action clichés. The last half hour is particularly bad.

2½ dirty ladies out of 5

Swordfish (2001)

Travolta embarrasses himself with a silly line of hair on his chin. Everyone else has to work a little harder at it, but still manage to embarrass themselves one way or another. Hugh Jackman uses a keyboard like the rest of us play air guitar. Don’t be fooled, there are no fish in the film. It's a Joel Silver production, so there are some boring explosions and dumb plot threads flaffing in the wind. Don't watch sober.

2 ball-bearing jackets out of 5