Love Actually (2003)

I have a troubled personal history with this movie going all the way back to 2003, but it is strangely irresistible, magical and charming in a way that most ensemble romantic comedies manage to fail at. I credit that to Richard Curtis embracing the adult humor and R-rated spirit of the material, while somehow comfortably fitting into that cozy Christmas mold. The music in this film is also spectacular and manages to elevate it to new heights. While I'll never shake the pain of watching this alone for the first time (or the last), there's no denying it's become a classic at this point. I won't even try to resist anymore.

Audiences love to try and re-analyze films through the lenses of modern sensibilities and criticize some of its choices for being "tone-deaf" at the time, but that's just a lazy cop-out. It's aged remarkably well and has only gotten better in time. There's only one storyline in this film which I find abhorrent (it's not the one you think), and that's the only reason why I docked it half a star. It's an absolutely perfect romantic comedy aside from it. 

4½ hand-made signs out of 5

Genie (2023)

A bland, cookie-cutter remake of Bernard and the Genie. It's cute, I suppose, but very formulaic and lacking in genuine warmth (it didn't pass the litmus test of inspiring those "Christmas feelings" in me). Alan Cumming (who portrayed Bernard in the original) plays the role of the evil boss here (originally played by Rowan Atkinson). This time, the genie is Melissa McCarthy, who basically plays herself as a fish out of water. Whereas the charm of the original felt simple and effortless, this update feels forced and compelled to shove the Christmas spirit down your throat, and the whole thing ends up backfiring. 

If nothing else, I'm grateful that this movie introduced me to the original.

2 triangles of red bread out of 5

Bernard and the Genie (1991)

Bernard has just been sacked from work, found out his fiancée is fucking his best friend and is left with nothing...except an antique lamp which happens to house a disgraced genie imprisoned for thousands of years. Luckily, it's not one of those lame "three wishes" genies, but an infinity wish genie, which restores Bernard back to grace. This charming tale was created by that core talent responsible for Blackadder, Mr. Bean and the like. Lenny Henry inhabits the genie as a boisterous presence with a love for 20th century marvels. More than anything, it's just fun. I'm a sucker for these old made-for-TV movies. They sure don't make 'em like they used to.

4 Mr. Successes out of 5

That Christmas (2024)

An animated ensemble film about the residents of a small town experiencing their individual ups and downs. Most of the stories feel like vignettes that don't interconnect, so it lacks an altogether cohesive structure, while Santa (featured front and center in the advertising) merely narrates and hardly gets involved. This movie takes its damn time and meanders about, by which point I had already checked out. Normally, I'm able to give saccharinity a pass during Christmas, but this was just plain grating and corny. It had its opposite intended effect and put me in a bad mood.

1 turkey out of 5

ABOUT TIME [2013]

Writer/director Richard Curtis has the habit of making irresistibly adorable movies, just as Rachel McAdams manages to find herself in more than her fair share of time travelling rom-coms.
Mash the two together and you get the harmlessly delightful pip-pip comedy About Time.
Sure it's riddled with plotholes (as most time-travel stories are) but it's the inspirational casting, wonderful soundtrack and soft-hearted laughs that make it worthwhile.  Most rom-coms are about whether or not the couple will get together in the end while this film is more about already living together and a moral message that isn't quite clear until the final frame.
It won't blow your mind or change your life but should give you the warm & fuzzies that won't insult your intelligence.

4 ping pong games out of 5