Leprechaun Returns (2018)

This "requel" attempts to do what the Halloween series did by pretending the rest of the sequels never happened and continuing the story after the first movie. The result is one big fat green shit on the face of every Leprechaun fan. The new guy (filling in Warwick's lofty buckled shoes) is a joke. They try to give him cheesy one-liners, but it reminds you why these movies only work with certain actors in the role.

Seriously, maybe I'll give those "Hood" movies another chance after seeing how low this series could sink.

½-assed attempt out of 5

Stream (2024)

It's always charming watching a shitty low-budget slasher film on the big screen (a one-night only event!). As an old school horror fan, I found it enjoyable for the B-list cameos alone. 

From the producers of the Terrifier series comes this schlockfest about residents of a hotel under attack, all the while being livestreamed out to the world (think Hostel). Jeffrey Combs is always a manic delight, although it looks like he's slowly transforming into Ed Wood or John Waters at this point. The kills in this movie are gory and tongue-in-cheek (playing Tic-Tac-Toe on a dude's torso was a highlight). Also, nothing makes me happier than seeing gratuitous nudity in a movie theater! So it worked for me on a certain level, though I'm fairly sure I enjoyed it 100% more than I would have streaming it at home.

2 split-screens out of 5

Leprechaun (1993)

It's the role Warwick Davis was born to play.
Holy shit, this brings back memories. An evil leprechaun goes looking for his missing gold shilling after being released from under the curse of a four-leaf clover. Cheesy laughs ensue. Notable for being Jennifer Aniston's first major movie role just one year before she struck gold on Friends. Bet she wishes she could bury this one. I actually find it very entertaining, however. This is one of those movies I class under "so bad, it's good."

3.5 lucky charms out of 5

Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985)

Greatest Movie Ever Made. Period.

This is the most fun I've ever had with my pants on (and sometimes off). I saw it for the first time when I was a wee lad—and over and over again—and more than two decades later, it still holds up as well as the first time as I saw it. Paul Reubens is maniacal fun, and the pairing of Tim Burton and Danny Elfman was a match made in heaven. Informed so much of my weird, twisted sense of humor as a kid. Still as inventive and funny as ever.

"I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel."

5 movies within a movie out of 5