Wrongfully Accused (1998)

Leslie Nielsen is the Lord of the Violin, aka Ryan Harrison, on the run from the law after being wrongfully accused of murder in this parody on The Fugitive, which also lampoons everything from Mission: Impossible, The Usual Suspects, North by Northwest, Braveheart, Titanic and even Baywatch. At a certain point, these movies just become about cramming in as many references as possible, which isn't funny in of itself; it's only when finding subversive ways around it that the humor really lands. Like with Spy Hard, this is pretty dumb common denominator stuff, and you have to be attuned to this kind of humor, although it pales in comparison to the great spoofs of years past. But Nielsen is having fun with it and that type of silliness is contagious under the right conditions.

There are plenty more parodies to go, but I'm too spoofed out at the moment.

2½ one-armed, one-eyed, one-legged men out of 5

Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993)

Inexplicably changing gears from Top Gun to an all-out assault on Rambo, we trade the military air base for the jungles of Iraq (?), where Topper (Sheen) is lured out of retirement in order to infiltrate a POW camp. It takes great care to lampoon other hits of the zeitgeist, such as Apocalypse Now, The Godfather, Basic Instinct and Terminator 2. Some of the novelty may have worn off by this point, but this is still an above average, top notch spoof comedy. Featuring unapologetically sophomoric, lowbrow humor, you either love it or hate it.

3½ Geronimos out of 5

Death Ship (1980)

A small group of survivors from a sunken cruise ship in the Atlantic think their rich bacon is saved when a ship that's still afloat appears. But the mysterious, rusted, seemingly abandoned vessel is... dun dun duuun... Death Ship!
The out-of-the-frying-pan survivors are a varied bunch, different in age as well as temperament. Perhaps the most notable is George Kennedy, who's his usual dependable self. Kennedy plays a Capt. Moodypants who's approaching retirement but not quite ready to accept what that means for his ego.
My heavy-eyes and insomnia-addled brain didn't cope well with the swaying, seasicky camera movements, but at least there's some justification for them.
At times it's a little like King's Overlook Hotel but on a ship, within which are a few standout scenes that are effectively dramatic.

2½ cold crew out of 5

WAIT UNTIL DARK [1967]

Olde Tyme 007 director Terence Young enlists Audrey Hepburn in her last film before semi-retirement for the suspenseful thriller Wait Until Dark.
Hepburn portrays a blind woman who's life is invaded by three dangerous crooks searching her home for a doll filled with heroin.
The film is a bit dated and takes it time getting to where it needs to but once it gets going the guessing game it becomes is a gripping delight.  If you're willing to accept that the whole set-up is the definition of an 'Idiot Plot' then it can be pretty fun, especially when you revel in Alan Arkin's nasty piece of work villain that is two steps away from twiddling his mustache.  If not for it's inventively tense climax the film might not be so fairly remembered but it's a great little yarn nevertheless.

3½ ways to defrost a fridge out of 5

Rambo III (1988)

Rambo goes to Afghanistan.
Rambo blows shit up.

1½ enemies of America vanquished out of 5

Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)

This is what happens when you let James Cameron help write your screenplay. Rambo, now literally a one-man army, gets sent back into Vietnam on a half-assed top-secret covert mission that enables him to crank the action genre clichés to maximum, and beyond. He creeps and plods through a jungle that was better lit than my back garden on a summer night, before initiating a maiming montage.
It was even worse than I remembered. The only saving grace was the almost complete lack of Arnie style one-liners.

1½ exploding arrows out of 5

First Blood (1982)

The name Rambo has become synonymous with the action hero genre, but the first film isn't like that at all. John Rambo is just a guy trying to survive in a world that doesn't want him. The enemy isn't a foreign power or a moustachioed villain intent on taking over the world, it’s small town prejudice and fear, it’s asshole cops that think a little power gives them the authority to dictate how everyone else should live.
Stallone isn't renowned for his acting ability, but to his credit he gives a chilling performance in one pivotal scene that is the film highpoint.

4 sharp edges out of 5