Wrongfully Accused (1998)

Leslie Nielsen is the Lord of the Violin, aka Ryan Harrison, on the run from the law after being wrongfully accused of murder in this parody on The Fugitive, which also lampoons everything from Mission: Impossible, The Usual Suspects, North by Northwest, Braveheart, Titanic and even Baywatch. At a certain point, these movies just become about cramming in as many references as possible, which isn't funny in of itself; it's only when finding subversive ways around it that the humor really lands. Like with Spy Hard, this is pretty dumb common denominator stuff, and you have to be attuned to this kind of humor, although it pales in comparison to the great spoofs of years past. But Nielsen is having fun with it and that type of silliness is contagious under the right conditions.

There are plenty more parodies to go, but I'm too spoofed out at the moment.

2½ one-armed, one-eyed, one-legged men out of 5

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1977)

An adaptation of H. G. Wells' 1896 novel of the same name, this version of the story stars Michael York as unlucky sailor Andrew Braddock, who ends up on the titular island after a shipwreck somewhere in the middle of the Pacific. The island is home to many types of animal and many secrets, overseen by the studious Dr. Moreau, a man driven by his obsession with biology and science.
We're supposed to sympathise with York's character the most, but it's Burt Lancaster as Moreau that dominates. The actor's performance communicates the scientist's ability to weigh his wickedness against his ultimate goal and come up with an imbalance on the side that's favourable to him. It feeds into musings on things such as morality, society, theocracy and law, but the film lost my attentions more than once, which is never a good sign.

2½ cell instructions out of 5

54 (1998)

Starstruck Shane O'Shea (with a name like that he could be Marvel’s own Captain Irish), a Jersey hopeful, wants more than the working class, suburban lifestyle his father provides for him; the ungrateful shit wants to mingle at Club 54, a place where the beautiful people are free to indulge their vices alongside the stars of stage and screen.
Music plays a big part, and is arguably the best part. The V/O, the characters and the story fail to meet the targets set by similar films.
The only real memorable elements were Mike Myers, who plays it straight even though his character isn't, and the aged Disco Dotty.

2 party favours out of 5

The Riddle of the Sands (1979)

A lone yachtsman correcting out of date coastline charts in German waters meets up with another ship by chance and develops feelings for the Captain’s daughter (played by Jenny Agutter).
It’s a slow-paced film that was initially bordering on tedious, but it takes a rather dramatic turn into something totally unexpected about halfway through; if you make it that far you’ll be rewarded.
The characters aren't very exciting but that’s part of their makeup.
I can’t say how faithful the cast or the film in general is to Erskine Childers’ source text because I haven’t read it. A reading may well enhance the emotional connection that I lacked.

2½ personal guests out of 5

Logan's Run (1976)

The future. 2274. A hedonistic utopia that demands a price of its citizens: on your thirtieth birthday you must take 'Carrousel' in a gamble to be ‘renewed.’ If, instead, you choose to flee, the Sandmen will hunt and terminate you. Logan is a Sandman and he’s nearing his ‘Last Day.’
LR is classic 70’s sci-fi with pertinent social commentary that’s obvious but isn't forced down the viewer’s throat; you can ignore it completely and still have fun with the campy, colourful sets and imaginative story.
Some of the decisions taken by the protagonists may seem a little stupid at times, but they aren't very bright by nature.
If dying at thirty is the price asked for having Jenny Agutter appear in your room at the press of a button... I’d be very tempted.

4 palm lights out of 5

Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)

Austin’s first flirtatious outing is an effective slice of James Bond parody and irreverent comedy sketches that never feel like they’re separate from the larger whole, but it’s dragged down by one thing: Liz Hurley. She sure looks good in clothes, but as an actress she’s worse than useless. It's Mike Myers as the paradoxically auspicious Austin that holds the attention and keeps the laughs coming.

3 conveniently placed objects out of 5

Austin Powers: Goldmember (2002)

The first half hour is eye-torture. The middle section, which stops all the asinine cameos and gets on with the 'story', is the most entertaining part.
What I like most about the Austin character is he’s a parody not just of the British, his antics highlight how America view the British, who are nothing like that in reality, so it secretly rips the ass out of both cultures; Myers is Canadian, so has a unique view of both.
The Dr Evil character lacks that duality and there's a lot of him in this one.
Too much flaffing around. Not enough Fat Bastard. It's a turd.

1½ gilded tallywhackers out of 5

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

A James Bond spoof that for me is a hell of a lot more entertaining than 90% of the real James Bond movies. Austin has to travel back to the swinging sixties to reclaim something that the baldy Dr Evil, the Blofeld-esque villain, has stolen from him. In typical Bond bullshit style he'll save the world and get the girl with the innuendo name.
Unfortunately, everything that takes place in Dr Evil’s lair is more miss than hit, except for the wonderful Frau Farbissina. However, the Austin Powers character is piss-inducing funny, so makes up for the failings of the other.
Comedy is one of the most subjective genres, so many will hate it.

3 pairs of machine gun jubblies out of 5