The 3 Worlds of Gulliver (1960)

Based on Jonathan Swift's famous Gulliver's Travels (1726) novel, the three worlds of the title refer to Gulliver's (Kerwin Mathews) own and just two others, Lilliput and Brobdingnag. If you've read the book, you'll know that it had more worlds thereafter, but the two chosen do at least keep the opposites theme that Swift's adventure relied heavily upon; likewise in their defining traits, with the Lilliputians being complicated and the Brobdingnagians naïve and simplistic. The themes of the novel are lessened but not excised and those that remain are integrated well enough, with Gulliver's observations criticising societal attitudes more often than they do specific individuals.
The things that might not be suitable for children have been altered, as has the ending, opting instead for an ambiguity that I wasn't particularly fond of.

2½ wrong rights out of 5

The Boy and the Beast (2015)

Shaken by a recent tragedy, nine-year-old runaway Ren ends up lost and alone, confused and angry on the streets of Tokyo. More than that, although maybe not aware of it at the time, he's in need of a parental figure to look up to. When he encounters Kumatetsu, a resident of the Beast Kingdom in search of a disciple to train, Ren’s hunger and curiosity get the better of him.
Dir. Mamoru Hosoda's film is a coming-of-age tale in an unusual guise, that being it's set mostly in a world that's populated by anthropomorphic beasts.
It took me a long time to warm to it, but its exploration of what constitutes 'strength' in the eyes of others and oneself, and showing how differences can be celebrated and learned from won me over eventually. If it had achieved the same in a lesser time, I'd have liked it more. As is, it felt too long.

3 dishrags out of 5

Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea (1961)

Scientific genius Admiral Harriman Nelson's Seaview super-sub is conducting trials in the frozen Arctic when an Irwin Allen disaster situation rears its movie-plot head, forcing the admiral to change his plans. In a reversal of expectations the sub becomes one of the few places that isn't under great threat. Furthermore, it may be the one thing that's capable of saving the day!
At its best it has a jolly Saturday morning TV adventure feeling about it, but it's one that's stretched a little thin, and besides Walter Pidgeon and Peter Lorre the movie doesn't have the same calibre of actors to keep things interesting that some of Irwin's other disaster flicks have. There's a clever lure that may keep a viewer seated until the story's end, but don't get your hopes up for anything tremendously memorable, because it really isn't there.

2½ temperature readings out of 5

Battlefield Earth (2000)

aka Battlefield Earth: A Saga of the Year 3000

Given BE's shitty reputation I expected bad acting or incompetent editing, but what struck me as the worst aspect was the direction! Bloody hell, the word 'amateur' doesn’t apply — it could aspire to that — it's downright atrocious. The majority of the film is shot in canted angles, which makes no rational sense, adding nothing of value to the story. If I'd not been viewing it in a 2.35:1 ratio (on DVD, bought for 10p sealed from a charity shop) I'd have thought there were shenanigans afoot because the blundering CUs make it look like an unwatchable 'zoomed-in to avoid copyright detection' video on YouTube. Oh, and yes, the editing and acting, especially Travolta, are mostly awful, too. Even the 'so bad it's good' category has standards, which BE didn't meet.

0 rat meals out of 5

N. a Pris les Dés... (1971)

aka N. Took the Dice

Music lovers will probably be familiar with the concept of a remix. Alain Robbe-Grillet did something similar with his L'éden et Après (1970) film. Constructed from outtakes, alternate and unused footage, N. a Pris les Dés... is essentially the same story but from a different character's perspective. It comments on its own design, how in scripted drama one thing follows another thing according to a set of rules. Then, equated to a dice roll, it arranges itself in a less straightforward manner. More than just a professed justification for being non-linear, it develops meaning through repetition and reinvention, unified by self-analysis and its relationship to the original film. The bizarre soundtrack helps the imagery gel, but as a narrative in its own right it may confound. As a companion to L'éden et Après, however, it's effective.

3½ stolen gazes out of 5

Fantastic Voyage (1966)

The story concerns a five-man team who get shrunk to the size of a microbe and injected into the body of a comatose subject in order to perform surgery deep inside the sleeping victim. The contrast between inside and outside the body, between trippy 60s visuals and militaristic ones is amusing, but the lack of atmosphere and immediacy in either environment is a handicap.
The location-specific problems and solutions are sometimes well-placed, but when it attempts some philosophy it succeeds mostly in grinding the plot to a standstill. I enjoyed the film as a kid but not so much as an adult. Now I loved only the opening credits and the teasing cold-war vibes of the beginning.

2½ unknown factors out of 5

Street Hawk: The Movie (1985)

A pilot for a short-lived TV series about motorcycle-cop Jesse Mach (Rex Smith), a man with a "test pilot mentality" who gets injured in the line of duty but finds new purpose as a well-funded anonymous do-gooder named Street Hawk! The bike can reach speeds of 300 mph, which, on public roads is as ridiculous (or as amazing) as it sounds. The action is packed with clichés, including tons of empty cardboard boxes on side streets that cars scatter dramatically as they roar through them in hot pursuit of speeding bad guys. While not as good as the 12 episode series that ultimately followed, if you're a fan of 80s stuff you may have some limited fun. It won't take up much of your time; despite being called 'The Movie' it's only about 70 minutes long.

2 vertical lifts out of 5

It Came from Beneath the Sea (1955)

We're told that the US Navy submarine on which leading man Kenneth Tobey operates is "man's greatest weapon of the seas", so naturally in the depths there exists something more destructive: a hungry cephalopod, giant size.
The scientist phase of the story is paired with the romance sub-plot, but the real treasure is the 'It' of the title. It's not until near fifty minutes have passed that we get a first real glimpse of the creature. When it returns later to lay waste to a famous landmark — because the law of giant monsters states that non-famous ones aren't worth bothering about — it steals the show! Or rather, its animator Ray Harryhausen does. To be frank, the non-creature parts of the film are okay, but the many-tentacled terror is the high-point. It's by far the best stop-motion animated octopus that I've personally ever seen.

3 closed beaches out of 5

Police Story: Lockdown (2013)

aka Police Story 2013

Another reboot of the Police Story series, with Jackie Chan once again playing a different cop. It begins with a situation that's even more grim than before, then jumps back to show how events got to that point in time. Within that jump are further flashbacks showing how events got to that earlier point in time. It's less confusing than it may sound when written down, but the structure is perhaps the least of the film's problems because they do at least add depth to the principals, sometimes even putting a new spin on how we view them.
It's set largely in one cluttered location, but, alas, it's not an interesting one. To its credit it has a very different feeling than the previous film, but the Michael Bay car chase and South Korean-esque final third feel forced.

2½ calm talks out of 5

Death Race 2050 (2017)

aka Roger Corman's Death Race 2050

A sequel to Death Race 2000 (1975). The main objective seems to once again be satirical commentary on the political, social and cultural state of America, with emphasis on news and media entertainment. Story for the colourful racers takes a back seat; the returning Frankenstein character (originally David Carradine, now Manu Bennett) gets the most attention, though it's still pretty meagre. The others get mostly rivalries. The flip-side of OTT characters is their being irksome, but none of them exasperate too much.
Overall, it lacks the era-specific charm of the 70s original, but its blackly humorous attacks on the class system, deforestation, racial and religious issues, etc, is entertaining - provided you liked the previous film.

2½ proxies out of 5

Father Christmas (1991)

The answer to what Father Christmas does with the 360+ days of the year that he isn't working comes courtesy of another Raymond Briggs adaptation.
The red-nosed gift-giver sounds remarkably like comedian Mel Smith (because it is) and lives in England, which was news to me. We witness him holidaying in Europe and America, indulging his passions at the expense of his suffering wallet. His antics make him somewhat relatable, but he's too much of a complainer to actually like very much. It has a slight connection to The Snowman (1982), but it isn't in the same league. And while the character designs are similar, the animation is less pencil-esque pretty than the other.

2½ bloomin trots of 5

The Snowman (1982)

Based on Raymond Briggs' picture book (1978) of the same name, the beautifully hand-drawn frame animation The Snowman has become a British national treasure over the years. My version has David Bowie trying to fool viewers into believing that he was the kid who went on a magical moonlit adventure; if that's true, why was he opening James Brighton's present?
I love how the snowman is as awed by the peculiar world of man as much as the kid is awed by the walking snowman, and I love how music takes the place of words. Only once is there lyrics, a single song that's come to define the entire production. It's used during the scene that's referenced and parodied most, but in tandem they capture the magic of youth superbly. But for me it's the animation's memorable ending that really makes it special.

3½ chilled revellers out of 5

Tsotsi (2005)

Tsotsi (Presley Chweneyagae) is an opportunist gangster who lives in a Johannesburg slum. An impromptu nighttime carjacking is a doorway to great change for the thug, unearthing a streak of compassion that results in some truly believable human emotions played out onscreen, supported by flashbacks to hardship that give a deeper insight into his state of mind.
A woman named Miriam (Terry Pheto) adds a welcome sensitivity to the story, a point of contrast that is itself shaped by poverty and personal struggle.
The setting, the doleful but comforting voice of Vusi Mahlasela, the contextual skies, and the inner-struggles of not just the primaries but some of the more interesting secondary characters each make Dir. Gavin Hood's film an absolute joy to experience. If you've access to the alternate endings, give them a look because some are as good as what was ultimately chosen.

4 environmental triggers out of 5

The Story of Yonosuke (2013)

aka A Story of Yonosuke

Yonosuke Yokomichi (Kengo Kora) travels from Nagasaki to Tokyo to study at the city's university. He's a little shy, slightly naïve and subjectively strange, but he makes friends easily, sometimes without even trying.
In later years the people that Yonosuke met reflect on the time spent with him, appreciating how he touched and enriched each of their lives in a unique way. In service of that the story jumps back and forth in time to show how an event in the past shapes the future (i.e. the present); a mature understanding of how time seasons those kinds of memories will increase your enjoyment. It's a beautiful idea, overall, but the result is a little underwhelming at times.

2½ sambas out of 5

Dog Day Afternoon (1975)

A film about a bank heist that doesn't go to plan probably won't seem like much of an original concept to a modern audience weaned on QT, but Dog Day Afternoon sells itself as being true, which is unusual. I've no idea whether it's as factual as it claims to be, but it's an enjoyable journey, nevertheless.
Al Pacino's rifle-wielding character is a kind of likeable rogue that somehow manages to turn amateur hour at the bank into a public media extravaganza, morphing a desperate hostage situation into one that highlights a number of social problems. His partner in crime (John Cazale) is more reserved but leaves a dent all of his own in viewer sympathies. Things increase at length, but Dir.  Sidney Lumet's no-frills approach keeps the heart of the story to the fore.

3½ state-employed con-men out of 5