PARKER [2013]

Taylor Hackford steps a bit out of his comfort zone by directing his first "gritty" crime thriller, the Jason Statham vehicle, Parker.
The film starts off like it could be intriguing but quickly slides off that notion and gets painfully predictable and boring as it begins feeling slapped together and uninspired.  Surprisingly, Jennifer Lopez is the shining light here, as she serves as comic relief in tight skirts while The Stath is beginning to get just a little too comfy by never pushing himself to do anything but collect a paycheck these days.  In the end, the film is nothing short of boring and dull, with the exception of feeling embarrassed for The Stath as he tries to pull off a Texan accent.  Feck.

2 Fish camps out of 5

BLOOD CREEK [2009]

I have to give it to director Joel Schumacher for constantly exploring different genres and styles.

In Blood Creek, Schumacher goes all out with the gore and an unusual amount of animal cruelty.  

While the film isn't necessarily very good, it certainly is unpredictable.

I went in expecting pure shit and came out mildly amused and entertained.  

2½ stomach fluid surprises out of 5