Hell House LLC: Lineage (2025)

In a departure from the first four films in the series, we abandon the found footage angle in order to tell a traditional narrative about a woman haunted by visions. Intended as the final entry in the series, all it does is leave us with more questions. Removing the action from the claustrophobic constraints of found footage quickly exposes the limited appeal of this franchise to begin with. Nothing much at all happens during the duration of this film. This is an atmospheric mood piece that goes nowhere. It's an empty, hollow experience.

½ a premise squandered out of 5

Hell House LLC Origins: The Carmichael Manor (2023)

Part 4 attempts to shine a light on the origin story, but it's diminishing returns. A paranormal investigator stays at a haunted manor with possible connections to the Abaddon Hotel. They see the scariest shit imaginable and walk towards it instead of out of the house. It makes no fucking sense. And it always annoys me how no one ever reviews the footage they shot. And even when they do, they never take it seriously, so what's the point of recording everything in the first place?

2 dead ends out of 5

Hell House LLC III: Lake of Fire (2019)

By the third film, all the events have repeated to the point that there are no fresh ideas left. It's obvious what's going on because they keep reiterating the same plot points. The more these movies try to explain it, the less scary it is. We're basically just tuning in to see that clown moving its head creepily. 

The thing that annoys me the most is that these are either the bravest or dumbest motherfuckers who ever lived. They keep seeing all this unexplained phenomena captured on camera and they still refuse to take the threat seriously. They were given PLENTY of warning, so it's basically on them.

2 gateways out of 5

Hell House LLC II: The Abaddon Hotel (2018)

A journalism team breaks into the Abaddon Hotel, the site of the mysterious deaths that took place 8 years ago. Like the original, it's filled with creepiness and is surprisingly effective for such a bare bones production. As long as you buy into the mythology, it'll keep your interest hooked, even though the characters themselves never seem to take the threats seriously enough.

2½ barricades out of 5

Hell House LLC (2015)

In 2009, an accident occurs at a local Halloween haunted house attraction, claiming the lives of 15 people. A documentary crew investigates the tragedy while examining video captured by the staff. If you're not a fan of found footage, this won't convert you. But if you have patience made of steel, you earn the scares. It's low tech as fuck, basically a camcorder being pointed and shot, but it's effective. That are some parts that genuinely put fear into your chest, but you're mostly cursing the stupidity of the characters the entire time.

2½ clown mannequins out of 5