GLEN OR GLENDA [1953]

Ed Wood's Glen or Glenda is a highly unusual film that is difficult to stop watching once you start falling down the hallucinatory rabbit hole.
It follows a story about a man who secretly enjoys wearing woman's clothing and another man who undergoes a sex change, all surrounded by a drugged out Bela Lugosi tripping through "narrative" dialogues of mumbo jumbo.
There's an extended dream sequence that gets a little rapey, creepy devils, haunted houses and the obligatory transexual film staple: a buffalo stampede.  It feels like it was intended to be a forward thinking documentary but I guess Wood forgot and headed in fantasy-driven directions that only made sense to him.  The inconsistencies are nothing short of hilarious and make it all the more entertaining for the truckloads of whathtefuckery.

2½ big green dragons that sit on your doorstep out of 5

PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE [1959]

Vampire zombies.  Flying saucers on strings.  Wobbly gravestones.  A single scene turns from night to day 9 times.  An actor is clearly replaced by someone else.  It can only be Ed Wood's Plan 9 from Outer Space.
An alien race, who tried to conquer Earth eight times before, decide to resurrect only 3 corpses to take over the world and make it a better place.
It's been called "the worst movie ever made" and with good reason.  It's one of those films where I'm thinking "good it's almost over" only to find I just reached the half-way mark...and it's only 78 minutes long!  However, part of it's charm is where director Ed Wood genuinely believed he was making a good film and not purposely shoveling shit at the viewer to sell their own stupidity back to them (I'm looking at you Sharknado).  If you're going to watch really bad films for the laughs, then go for the real deal because Plan 9 is a gold-mine of cinematic crap.

1 alien grave robber out of 5